Top 10 Cringiest Twilight Moments
twilight, cringiest moments,
Script written by Nick Spake
We apologize in advance to Twilighters, Twihards, and Twi-Moms. Welcome to MsMojo, and today we’ll be counting down our picks for the Top 10 Cringiest Twilight Moments.
For this list, we’ll be looking at the most cringe-worthy, problematic, and downright ridiculous moments from the “Twilight” movies. Whether you like these films or not, you have to admit that they’re ripe for satire.
#10: Bella First Sees Edward
Upon release, teenagers everywhere hailed “Twilight” as a romance for the ages, to which many critics replied, “Seriously?” Bella’s relationship with Edward is gawkish from the get-go and it doesn’t get much better from there. Edward bewitches Bella the second he walks through the cafeteria door, sporting a brooding demeanor and a hairdo that makes Jean-Ralphio look subtle. After exchanging blank glances from across the room, they’re later paired together in biology. This immediately makes Edward uneasy due to Bella’s um… enticing stench. Love at first sight is one thing, but love at first smell is definitely a weird way to kick off a relationship. The way Edward intensely stares at Bella in silence until the bell rings only adds to the creep factor.
#9: Jacob Is Hotter
In “Eclipse,” Bella finds herself in the middle of a bloodthirsty battle. Not the Battle of the newborn army. We mean the battle between Team Edward and Team Jacob. When Bella is chilled to the bone while camping, Edward and Jacob are forced to put their heated love triangle aside. Since Edward doesn’t exactly have the warmest body, a topless Jacob steps up to the plate. This amounts to arguably the funniest line in the movie, although we’re not sure if it’s funny for the reasons that the writers intended: [broll: “I am hotter than you.”] Although the guys do briefly bond, Jacob kind of spoils the moment when he tells Edward that even if Bella was out of the picture, he still wouldn’t like him. Talk about a cold shoulder.
#8: Jacob Kisses Bella Without Consent
Spelling out his feelings - as if they weren’t obvious already - Jacob pleads with Bella to choose him. Although Bella makes it clear that she loves Edward, Jacob won’t take no for an answer and forces a kiss. This scene was uncomfortable back in 2010 and viewing it through a modern lens, Jacob’s actions really haven’t aged well. Bella rightfully responds by punching Jacob in the face. This might be an empowering moment for Bella if it didn’t break her hand. We know werewolves have enhanced strength, but is Jacob’s skull made of titanium? Either that or Bella needs a lot more calcium in her diet. The only thing more cringe-inducing than the scene itself is listening to Jacob recount what happened to a dazed Charlie.
#7: Bella & Edward’s Wedding
If you never got into “Twilight,” chances are you weren’t especially ecstatic when Bella and Edward’s wedding day finally came. The same can be said about Bella herself, as an equally discomforted Charlie walks his daughter down the aisle. Granted, Bella always had reservations about this wedding. Still, she looks less like someone who’s about to get married and more like Mike when he got sick at the movies. Bella does lighten up once she sees Edward, but have you ever listened closely to the song in the background? Of all the songs to play at a wedding, why choose one with the lyrics, “Now I’m a fat house cat?” Luckily they didn’t get to the verse about “poison rats” “pissing on magazine photos.”
#6: Jacob Reveals His True Nature to Charlie
We’re just gonna say it. Charlie totally stole the show in these movies and that’s mainly thanks to actor Billy Burke’s priceless reaction shots. Charlie’s most memorable moment comes in the final film when Jacob introduces him to the supernatural world. Being Jacob, this of course involves taking his shirt off. When Charlie woke up that morning, we doubt he expected his daughter’s sort-of-ex-boyfriend to strip down in front of him. How can you not crack up when Charlie matter-of-factly tells Jacob to put some clothes on? Even more surreal than Jacob’s striptease is when he turns into a werewolf in front of Charlie. This scene isn’t helped by the terrible CGI, but we dare you not to smile at Charlie’s startled response.
#5: Bella, Edward & The Bed
There’s absolutely nothing wrong with waiting until marriage, but this can amount to an awkward honeymoon, especially when the bride is a human and the groom is a vampire. After skinny dipping on a moonlit night, Bella and Edward take things into the bedroom. Edward doesn’t know his own strength, however, and destroys the bed’s headboard. While this would normally be enough to kill the mood, Bella and Edward carry on anyway… only for the scene to cut to black. We weren’t expecting much from a PG-13 rating, but for a moment that had been built up for almost three years, this was a pretty unsatisfying climax. Then again, given the state of the bed, maybe we should be grateful that the deed occurred offscreen.
#4: The Wolves Start Talking
As mentioned before, few would use words like “state-of-the-art” to describe the special effects in these movies, particularly when it comes to the CGI wolves. Just when you think that the wolves can’t possibly get any sillier, ugh … just listen. Keep in mind that this is the fourth “Twilight” movie and up until this point, we’ve never heard the wolves talk to each other like this. Not only is this moment jarring, but it’s unintentionally hilarious. The voice actors all try way too hard to sound tough and the over-the-top sound effects make matters infinitely more laughable. The goofiest part is that the wolves communicate telepathically, meaning their dialogue doesn’t sync up with their mouth movements. What is this, the gritty reboot of “Homeward Bound?”
#3: Sparkle, Sparkle, Sparkle
One of the biggest problems people have with “Twilight” is that it ignores most of the characteristics vampires traditionally have in folklore. Instead, Stephenie Meyer made up several traits that many would argue are… well, lamer than anything we’d ever associate with Dracula. A key example is when Edward and Bella find the only glimmer of sunlight in the dreary woods. Stepping into the light, Edward shows Bella what he really is: the human incarnation of a disco ball… er, we mean a vampire. The cringey imagery is complemented by some of the franchise’s worst dialogue. Plus, when you put the words “Twilight” and “Sparkle” together, all anyone is going to think about is “My Little Pony”; but even that franchise doesn’t have glittering vampires.
#2: Renesmee
The closest “Twilight” ever comes to legitimate horror territory is when Bella gives birth to her daughter, who sadly must go through life with the name Renesmee. As difficult as the birthing scene is to watch, it’s what comes after that gets under our skin. Now a vampire, Bella awakens to find her baby happy, healthy, and 100% CGI. It’s hard to get invested when Renesmee looks like a reject from “Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2.” Would it have been that hard just to get a real baby? As if the scene wasn’t tonally confused enough, Bella rips into Jacob upon finding out that he’s imprinted on Renesmee and given her a nickname. This amounts to both the worst and most amazing line in the movie: [broll: “You nicknamed my daughter after the loch ness monster!”]
Before we unveil our top pick, here are a few dishonorable mentions.
Aro’s Laugh, “The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 2” (2012)
Michael Sheen Is Clearly Doing Whatever He Wants Here
Jacob Imprints on Renesmee, “The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 1” (2011)
Edward Got the Girl, But Jacob Got His Daughter
Bella & Jacob in the Rain, “The Twilight Saga: New Moon” (2009)
We Miss Jacob’s Long Hair
Keeping It In the Family, “Twilight” (2008)
We Agree with Jessica, It’s Weird
Sam Imprints on Emily Despite Being with Leah, “The Twilight Saga: Eclipse” (2010)
We Guess It’s a Werewolf Thing
#1: Edward Watches Bella Sleep
2008 was a simpler time when it was considered socially acceptable for a boy to break into a girl’s house and watched her sleep. Actually, that was NEVER okay; but for some reason, Bella doesn’t see a major problem with Edward stalking her at night. When Edward tells Bella that he’s been doing this for months, it feels more like something out of a psychological thriller than a teen romance. Honestly, if Edward wasn’t “totally gorgeous,” we don’t think Bella would find this charming. We think she’d call the police… or her father who’s a cop. This scene sums up why “Twilight” is so cringe-worthy. Edward’s a creeper, Bella has no common sense, and their first kiss should’ve been one of the many red flags.
Top 10 Cringiests Twilight Moments
We apologize in advance to Twilighters, Twihards, and Twi-Moms. Welcome to MsMojo, and today we’ll be counting down our picks for the Top 10 Cringiest Twilight Moments.
For this list, we’ll be looking at the most cringe-worthy, problematic, and downright ridiculous moments from the “Twilight” movies. Whether you like these films or not, you have to admit that they’re ripe for satire.
#10: Bella First Sees Edward
“Twilight” (2008)
Upon release, teenagers everywhere hailed “Twilight” as a romance for the ages, to which many critics replied, “Seriously?” Bella’s relationship with Edward is gawkish from the get-go and it doesn’t get much better from there. Edward bewitches Bella the second he walks through the cafeteria door, sporting a brooding demeanor and a hairdo that makes Jean-Ralphio look subtle. After exchanging blank glances from across the room, they’re later paired together in biology. This immediately makes Edward uneasy due to Bella’s um… enticing stench. Love at first sight is one thing, but love at first smell is definitely a weird way to kick off a relationship. The way Edward intensely stares at Bella in silence until the bell rings only adds to the creep factor.
#9: Jacob Is Hotter
“The Twilight Saga: Eclipse” (2010)
In “Eclipse,” Bella finds herself in the middle of a bloodthirsty battle. Not the Battle of the newborn army. We mean the battle between Team Edward and Team Jacob. When Bella is chilled to the bone while camping, Edward and Jacob are forced to put their heated love triangle aside. Since Edward doesn’t exactly have the warmest body, a topless Jacob steps up to the plate. This amounts to arguably the funniest line in the movie, although we’re not sure if it’s funny for the reasons that the writers intended: [broll: “I am hotter than you.”] Although the guys do briefly bond, Jacob kind of spoils the moment when he tells Edward that even if Bella was out of the picture, he still wouldn’t like him. Talk about a cold shoulder.
#8: Jacob Kisses Bella Without Consent
“The Twilight Saga: Eclipse” (2010)
Spelling out his feelings - as if they weren’t obvious already - Jacob pleads with Bella to choose him. Although Bella makes it clear that she loves Edward, Jacob won’t take no for an answer and forces a kiss. This scene was uncomfortable back in 2010 and viewing it through a modern lens, Jacob’s actions really haven’t aged well. Bella rightfully responds by punching Jacob in the face. This might be an empowering moment for Bella if it didn’t break her hand. We know werewolves have enhanced strength, but is Jacob’s skull made of titanium? Either that or Bella needs a lot more calcium in her diet. The only thing more cringe-inducing than the scene itself is listening to Jacob recount what happened to a dazed Charlie. #7: Bella & Edward’s Wedding
“The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 1” (2011)
If you never got into “Twilight,” chances are you weren’t especially ecstatic when Bella and Edward’s wedding day finally came. The same can be said about Bella herself, as an equally discomforted Charlie walks his daughter down the aisle. Granted, Bella always had reservations about this wedding. Still, she looks less like someone who’s about to get married and more like Mike when he got sick at the movies. Bella does lighten up once she sees Edward, but have you ever listened closely to the song in the background? Of all the songs to play at a wedding, why choose one with the lyrics, “Now I’m a fat house cat?” Luckily they didn’t get to the verse about “poison rats” “pissing on magazine photos.”
#6: Jacob Reveals His True Nature to Charlie
“The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 2” (2012)
We’re just gonna say it. Charlie totally stole the show in these movies and that’s mainly thanks to actor Billy Burke’s priceless reaction shots. Charlie’s most memorable moment comes in the final film when Jacob introduces him to the supernatural world. Being Jacob, this of course involves taking his shirt off. When Charlie woke up that morning, we doubt he expected his daughter’s sort-of-ex-boyfriend to strip down in front of him. How can you not crack up when Charlie matter-of-factly tells Jacob to put some clothes on? Even more surreal than Jacob’s striptease is when he turns into a werewolf in front of Charlie. This scene isn’t helped by the terrible CGI, but we dare you not to smile at Charlie’s startled response.
#5: Bella, Edward & The Bed
“The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 1” (2011)
There’s absolutely nothing wrong with waiting until marriage, but this can amount to an awkward honeymoon, especially when the bride is a human and the groom is a vampire. After skinny dipping on a moonlit night, Bella and Edward take things into the bedroom. Edward doesn’t know his own strength, however, and destroys the bed’s headboard. While this would normally be enough to kill the mood, Bella and Edward carry on anyway… only for the scene to cut to black. We weren’t expecting much from a PG-13 rating, but for a moment that had been built up for almost three years, this was a pretty unsatisfying climax. Then again, given the state of the bed, maybe we should be grateful that the deed occurred offscreen.
#4: The Wolves Start Talking
“The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 1” (2011)
As mentioned before, few would use words like “state-of-the-art” to describe the special effects in these movies, particularly when it comes to the CGI wolves. Just when you think that the wolves can’t possibly get any sillier, ugh … just listen. Keep in mind that this is the fourth “Twilight” movie and up until this point, we’ve never heard the wolves talk to each other like this. Not only is this moment jarring, but it’s unintentionally hilarious. The voice actors all try way too hard to sound tough and the over-the-top sound effects make matters infinitely more laughable. The goofiest part is that the wolves communicate telepathically, meaning their dialogue doesn’t sync up with their mouth movements. What is this, the gritty reboot of “Homeward Bound?”
#3: Sparkle, Sparkle, Sparkle
“Twilight” (2008)
One of the biggest problems people have with “Twilight” is that it ignores most of the characteristics vampires traditionally have in folklore. Instead, Stephenie Meyer made up several traits that many would argue are… well, lamer than anything we’d ever associate with Dracula. A key example is when Edward and Bella find the only glimmer of sunlight in the dreary woods. Stepping into the light, Edward shows Bella what he really is: the human incarnation of a disco ball… er, we mean a vampire. The cringey imagery is complemented by some of the franchise’s worst dialogue. Plus, when you put the words “Twilight” and “Sparkle” together, all anyone is going to think about is “My Little Pony”; but even that franchise doesn’t have glittering vampires.
#2: Renesmee
“The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 2” (2012)
The closest “Twilight” ever comes to legitimate horror territory is when Bella gives birth to her daughter, who sadly must go through life with the name Renesmee. As difficult as the birthing scene is to watch, it’s what comes after that gets under our skin. Now a vampire, Bella awakens to find her baby happy, healthy, and 100% CGI. It’s hard to get invested when Renesmee looks like a reject from “Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2.” Would it have been that hard just to get a real baby? As if the scene wasn’t tonally confused enough, Bella rips into Jacob upon finding out that he’s imprinted on Renesmee and given her a nickname. This amounts to both the worst and most amazing line in the movie: [broll: “You nicknamed my daughter after the loch ness monster!”]
Before we unveil our top pick, here are a few dishonorable mentions.
Aro’s Laugh, “The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 2” (2012)
Michael Sheen Is Clearly Doing Whatever He Wants Here
Jacob Imprints on Renesmee, “The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 1” (2011)
Edward Got the Girl, But Jacob Got His Daughter
Bella & Jacob in the Rain, “The Twilight Saga: New Moon” (2009)
We Miss Jacob’s Long Hair
Keeping It In the Family, “Twilight” (2008)
We Agree with Jessica, It’s Weird
Sam Imprints on Emily Despite Being with Leah, “The Twilight Saga: Eclipse” (2010)
We Guess It’s a Werewolf Thing
#1: Edward Watches Bella Sleep
“Twilight” (2008)
2008 was a simpler time when it was considered socially acceptable for a boy to break into a girl’s house and watched her sleep. Actually, that was NEVER okay; but for some reason, Bella doesn’t see a major problem with Edward stalking her at night. When Edward tells Bella that he’s been doing this for months, it feels more like something out of a psychological thriller than a teen romance. Honestly, if Edward wasn’t “totally gorgeous,” we don’t think Bella would find this charming. We think she’d call the police… or her father who’s a cop. This scene sums up why “Twilight” is so cringe-worthy. Edward’s a creeper, Bella has no common sense, and their first kiss should’ve been one of the many red flags.
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