Top 10 Ian and Paul Moments on Have I Got News For You

Top 10 Ian & Paul Moments on Have I Got News For You 

Welcome to WatchMojoUK, and today we’re counting down our picks for the best moments shared by “Have I Got News For You’s” team captains. 

#10: Battle to the Bottom

The only show on TV that celebrates getting zero points is “Pointless,” hosted by Alexander Armstrong. Although he is the most frequent guest “Have I Got News For You” host, he wasn’t on hand for this episode–so why both team captains attempted to give the worst possible answers that they could is anyone’s guess. A simple buzzer came from Paul just to break the silence during the Odd-One-Out round, whereas Ian gave the most convoluted guess that he could muster. As Paul put it, it’s the worst answer in the show’s history, but Ian is quick to point out that his rival team captain didn’t do much better…

#9: Paul and Ian Holding Mensch to Task

Normally, it’s Ian that goes on the offensive–taking some more questionable guests to task if and when they need it. Paul is usually a bit more reserved, but in this episode–which aired around the time of the Occupy London protests, they both tore into a guest. Louise Mensch, former Tory M.P., was probably expecting her flak from her Team Captain, when she announced her disapproval over the protesters–but Paul fired the first shot. He was livid at her equating protesters’ choice of coffee with hypocrisy and only backed down to let Ian take over in his erudite way. It’s a rare moment of frustration from Paul–but certainly one he knew would be backed up by Ian.

#8: Val Doonican

Culturally, you wouldn’t ordinarily think the rival team captains have many shared interests–especially not in the early days of the show. So no one was perhaps as surprised as Ian, when he learned that Paul also had a shared appreciation of easy-listening pop singer and songwriter Val Doonican. After admitting it, Paul even started singing one of Doonican’s hits… and then joined in as Ian began a rendition of “The Marvelous Toy.” The surprise extended to host Angus Deayton, who had to know more about Paul’s knowledge of Doonican–but he quickly returned to his disguise of indifference when noticing that he and Ian had a new-found commonality…

#7: Rebellion

In May 2002, during filming of series 23, it was revealed that host Angus Deayton–had been up to no good. In an instance where commentators of the news became the news, the two team captains were quick to jump onto the scandal–making sure Deayton got the same treatment that anyone else who’d fallen foul of news coverage would. They admittedly planned ahead of the next episode filmed, and brought the incriminating newspapers with them… well, Ian did; Paul had his pressed onto a T-shirt. Unfortunately, more revelations would come out during filming of the following series, and Deayton was sacked before the third episode. The captains’ rinsing, whilst funny, was not without detractors–Stephen Fry has refused to appear as a guest ever since. 

#6: Last Week's Show

If Paul was hoping for any back-up from Ian, it would have been at this moment. Upon seeing a clip about Ikea furniture being assembled by robots, he is convinced that they’re repeating a segment from last week’s show; looking completely bemused and reading the autocue to confirm. It’s only when a producer corrects him that he realises he’s experiencing deja-vu. The reason why Ian didn’t even attempt to help him out wasn’t because he knew Paul was wrong, but because of the fear that he might’ve been right–and is therefore developing memory problems. However, Ian is gleeful to report that it’s actually Paul who has them.

#5: Ian's Acting Debut

Paul Merton isn’t an actor, but is a performer–regularly appearing on stage with his improv comedy troupe. This is in addition to his TV debut in “Whose Line Is It Anyway” in which he would have to act out scenes sans script. However, unlike his son Will, Ian Hislop, is definitely not an actor–a fact which was proven beyond all doubt when he appear   ed in Greek drama “To Nisi.” This revelation came up in “Have I Got News For You” to which Ian explains that his casting came about as a budget decision to play the role in the series, which was an adaptation of his wife’s book. But it’s not Ian’s performance that earns this moment into our list, but Paul’s stunned reaction…

#4: Ian Still Doesn't Win

The final scores of the show often fall Paul’s way. Despite being the editor-in-chief of British the most prominent satirist magazine, “Private Eye” and therefore having to be up-to-date on all current news, Ian Hislop rarely wins an episode of “Have I Got News For You.” Even though neither man knows who the show’s score-keeper actually is, Ian thought he was in with a chance when then-MP Roy Hattersley pulled out of Paul’s team at the last minute, and was replaced with a tub of lard. And yet–he still didn’t win: despite Paul being at a very clear disadvantage, somehow securing a comfortable victory with his solo efforts and dairy.

#3: What Injunction?

For a time, panel shows such as “HIGNFY” were under scrutiny not to break a court-mandated super-injunction. These were taken out by celebs as a sort of gagging order for various misdeeds–preventing anyone from talking about who raised it, and why–even if it was common knowledge. Naturally, this would be restrictive for topical comedians, unless the celebrity lifted it–which is what Jeremy Clarkson did prior to this 2011 episode. Of course, Ian Hislop admitted that he knew about all the details, but Paul decided to make matters worse–claiming Ian had told him all the saucy details, and implicating him as in breach of the super-injunction. A very badly timed phone call seemingly sealed Hislop’s story.

#2: Merton is Host

The aforementioned sacking of Angus Deayton prompted the then-novel idea of using guest hosts. Obviously, this is now the norm, but at the time, producers had encountered a bit of a pickle–especially as “Have I Got News For You” was on its third episode of series 22 when the host chair was vacated. At the last minute, Paul Merton stepped up, going from team captain to presenter duties. Unsurprisingly, Merton took no time in suggesting Ian Hislop’s team now had a better chance against Paul Merton’s team–which he still referred to as his despite supposedly being impartial. Surprisingly, Ian won that week. Merton’s hosting allowed more interaction between the two–including a great outtake where Ian provided voices for Paul’s miming.  

#1: The Coalition

In six hundred episodes, Paul and Ian have only been on the same team once; for ten minutes. In a special episode airing the day after the 2010 General Election, the two team captains put their differences aside and joined forces–with Paul pointing out that Ian’s chances of winning that week had just gone up. This was all in honour of the Conservatives forming a majority Government with the Liberal Democrats as the previous day’s events had returned a hung parliament. So, in a similar vein, host Jo Brand suggested they form their own “coalition” which, arguably unlike the then-incumbent Government, didn’t disappoint. Sound bytes mirroring the Tory-Lib Dem speeches, and plenty of back and forth–or rather, side-by-side, made for a truly one-off show.

Will you be tuning in to the sixty-eighth series of Have I Got News For You? Or was your favourite moment decades ago? Let us know, in the comments.