Top 10 Video Game Characters We Let Die
#10: Solaire of Astora
“Dark Souls” (2011) This poor soul was doomed to die the second we met him. As one of the few hopeful faces we encounter in the first “Dark Souls”, we had the hunch that something terrible was going to happen to him, and sure enough, not helping him in Lost Izalith will put him on a path towards death. Yes, it is possible to save him. However, you’ll have to go through a very specific set of conditions. Thing is that the game’s combat is too much fun, and Solaire’s story is too good despite how depressing it is. So, no. We’re not gonna save him. We want to bathe in the sorrow!
#9: Most of the Cast
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“Trover Saves the Universe” (2018) “Trover Saves the Universe” pulls almost every trick it can to make you out as the bad guy in the story. You and the purple pervert basically wreak havoc just to stop Glorkon from destroying the universe all while collecting an elusive set of Power Babies. Popping the Platinum Trophy on PS4 will require some heinous acts, though, which includes killing every character you meet. Knock Doopy Dooper off a cliff, crush Mr. Pop-Up and his house, even your cranky in-game landlord. Spare no one and you’ll be one step closer to achieving that digital trophy of significant importance!
#8: Our Dumbest Soldiers
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“XCOM” series (1994-) We’ll be the first to admit that the “XCOM” games can be incredibly frustrating. It feels like no matter what you do to improve your soldiers, they’ll always screw up in the most ridiculous ways possible. Missing a shot from point-blank range, succumbing to mind control, it all gets our thyroids pulsating. Eventually, it gets to a point where we care less about what happens to the dumbest members of our squad. We’ll use them as fodder while the big boys pull the weight and flank aliens. Either that or we just end up quitting the game and restarting our campaigns for the hundredth time.
#7: Little Sisters
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“BioShock” (2007) Upon reflection, there isn’t much reason to be so mean to the Little Sisters. They’re just little girls who have been possessed and become little demon children with big needles. Plus, saving all of them leads to “BioShock’s” good ending, which is arguably the best of the three games in the series. Still, harvesting them for more Adam sounds like a much better option. Look, if we’re a few measly Adam away from being able to shoot freakin’ killer bees out of our hand, then it’s time for little Sally to go! She had a good and psychotic life in Rapture! Sorry, not sorry!
#6: Steve Harrington
“Dead By Daylight” (2016) It’s no question that Steve is one of the most popular characters of the “Stranger Things” cast. But how he was relegated to “troll character” status in “Dead By Daylight” is beyond us. Before the “Stranger Things” content was pulled from DbD, it wasn’t uncommon for Survivors to be grouped with a Steve, and if you were, you were either in for a good time or a really, really bad one. Griefing Steve players had a reputation for bullying Killers with meta perks, intentionally screwing up skill checks, shining flashlights into the sky, or just being useless in general. If you were a Killer, you most likely tunneled and hooked him before anyone else, and the Survivors probably voluntarily let you get away with it.
#5: Matt
“Until Dawn” (2015) Matt’s purpose in “Until Dawn” is clear - he’s just a rebound for Emily to make Mike jealous and nothing more. Even Matt seems a bit unsure of how he fits with the group and his boundaries with Emily. Before we knew it, his end came just as quick as his introduction. If you gave the flare gun to Emily, you had also determined Matt’s fate. After the tower falls, Matt will wake up in the abandoned mines and fall victim to the Wendigos. Admittedly, his character isn’t all that interesting, so even if he did survive, you’d realize you didn’t miss much of an ending for him.
#4: The Adoring Fan
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“The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion” (2006) There are many characters in the world of “The Elder Scrolls” that we will unabashedly admit to offing early. Of them all, the Adoring Fan is the most irritating! This obsessive little dweeb shows up after you’ve become the Grand Champion of the Imperial City’s Arena. Problem is that he won’t shut the hell up! He will constantly kiss your ass and get in the way of combat as he tries to hide and cower. Even if you let him die or kill him yourself, he will show up three days later as if nothing happened. That’s fine - we’ll just treat him like Bill Murray in “Groundhog Day”.
#3: Slippy Toad
“Star Fox 64” (1997) The “Star Fox” team is a heck of a squadron to call in for assistance during intense dogfights! Fox has the determination and leadership, Peppy has the experience, Falco has the grit and attitude, and Slippy… Well, he’s a target. Throughout “Star Fox 64”, Slippy seems to be the one getting attacked the most as he will frequently call for your help. “Whoa!! Help me!” That is all you’ll hear for the majority of your journey to Venom. Sure, his ability to analyze a boss’s health meter is kind of useful, but eventually, we just shot him down ourselves and sent him to the docking bay.
#2: Yoshi
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“Super Mario World” (1990) Don’t get us wrong. We absolutely LOVE and adore Yoshi! Have you ever played “Yoshi’s Story” or “Crafted World”? He’s so cute that it’s almost unbearable! But that’s our feeling about him in his own games. When it comes to “Super Mario World”, on the other hand, he is nothing more than a tool. Not only are we gonna force him to eat nearly every enemy in the level, we will absolutely use him for emergency jumps if we have to! Traitorous? Maybe. Efficient? Totally. In the end, our goal is to rescue a princess. Dinosaurs are supposed to be extinct anyways.
#1: ACTUAL HUMANS
“Katamari” series (2004-18) “Katamari” is perhaps the biggest lie in games. You think this is some innocent, goofy game about rolling stuff up to make stars? Yeah, it kind of is...until you get to the later levels. That’s where you’re not just rolling up objects - you’re rolling up actual human beings! Adults, sailors, children even! And at the very end of it all, we’re rolling them up just to launch them into space and turn them into a star! You know, those tiny dots in the night sky that heat up to incomprehensible temperatures. And we would absolutely do it as many times as we desire.
