Somethings Just Aren’t Meant To Be
There aren’t many downsides to games hopping over to various other platforms. Aside from the occasional flub, the majority of the time game get ported over to their neighbouring consoles while retaining all their original features and visual splendour. Unless of course you’re talking about smartphones, that’s a whole other can of worms, which sometimes results in a great game being twisted into disaster…
#5: “Wolfenstein 3D Classic†(2009)
Due to their popularity, it only makes sense for FPS games to make the jump to mobile, but despite how good the game is, the actual port is terrible. For some mind boggling reason, movement speed is tied to your aiming sensitivity, meaning you’re either going way too fast, or laughably slow. It’s a serious problem when walking from point A to point B is a challenge in and of itself, and it makes shooting Nazis the most tedious and unfun activity. We know it can be done well since there’s plenty of better options available, so what the hell happened here?
#4: “Mortal Kombat X†(2015)
We all know that the real console experience would never work on smartphones, but despite NetherRealm Studios’ tinkering, the radical gameplay changes in an effort to make this title mobile-friendly ruined the core mechanics and controls. Fights are much shorter and more chaotic, and while X-ray attacks and fatalities all made it in the final version, executing them is basically just a quick time event, which completely takes the skill and sense of accomplishment out of perfroming the special moves. We want to outsmart and outplay our opponents, not tap the screen as fast as we can until their team is dead.
#3: “Resident Evil 4†(2009)
It’s on every other device in your home, but the version in your pocket is by far the worst one. The series has never been the most fast-paced of shooters, but this port takes that notion to a whole ‘nother level. Switching between running, aiming, shooting, the inventory, and knifing down your enemies makes every encounter an insane drag. Since all the enemies are slowed down to compensate, even the bosses don’t pose a threat, completely removing the tension. We shouldn’t be breezing through a game which focuses on struggling to survive.
#2: “BioShock†(2014)
If there was ever a game everyone should experience, this would probably be the one. We wouldn’t call this a lazy port by any means, but it is a very disappointing one. The downgraded visuals are to be expected, but the constant stuttering is incredibly annoying, and the game is way harder than it needs to be. Switching between your plasmids and weapons on the fly takes much longer than on consoles, which really hampers the experience in many boss fights. Another daunting problem is the fact that a game like BioShock requires immersion, and atmosphere is a tough sell on a 5-inch screen.
#1: “Painkiller: Purgatory†(2011)
If you’ve never played the franchise, it’s all about fast-paced demon killing in closed-off arenas, and it’s awesome. The weapons, soundtrack, and senseless violence all kick serious ass. Which is why it hurts so much that all of it was thrown out the window for the mobile port. Sure, it tries, but with imprecise movement, clipping through enemies when performing melee attacks, and the unbearable lag that occurs when running on mid-range hardware, this is a Painkiller game in name only. Being a bad port is one thing, but with so few enemy varieties, ugly graphics, and poor optimization, this is also a lazy one, and that’s inexcusable.
Be sure to check out the video below to see our picks for the Top 10 Best Smartphone Horror Games.
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