Top 20 Worst Movies of the 90s
#20: “Troll 2” (1990)
The first “Troll” wasn’t exactly a good movie, but it’s a masterpiece compared to “Troll 2.” Calling this a sequel is misleading, as it has nothing to do with the original outside of the title. A family moves to the rural town of "Nilbog" only to face the wrath of vegetarian goblins who try to turn them into plants so they can eat them. If hearing that sounds ridiculous, try actually watching it. Filming was an ordeal, as the cast only spoke English, while the crew only spoke Italian. This explains why the dialogue - and the film - are so strange. “Troll 2” later inspired the making-of documentary “Best Worst Movie.” Watch that if you’re looking for a non-painful way to enter “Troll 2’s” world.
#19: “Cool World” (1992)
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If “Who Framed Roger Rabbit” is the pinnacle of live-action/animated films, “Cool World,” is the nadir. Gabriel Byrne plays Jack Deebs, a cartoonist who enters the titular animated world, which also includes Brad Pitt’s detective and World War II vet, Frank Harris, and Kim Basinger as animated seductress Holli Would. Directed by animation legend Ralph Bakshi, “Cool World” seems like it should be at least interesting. Unfortunately, both the script and the direction are unfocused, and it’s hard to tell who the intended audience is.
#18: “Striptease” (1996)
One of the most important things about making a movie is tonal consistency, which includes the performances. In “Striptease,” Demi Moore plays an exotic dancer and former FBI agent fighting for custody of her daughter, played by Moore’s real-life daughter, Rumer Willis. The trouble is, while Moore gives a very earnest and serious performance, the rest of the cast is completely over-the-top. As a result, “Striptease” ends up being a movie you’re not sure you’re supposed to laugh at or with. Despite netting Moore a then-record $12.5 million payday and making more than $100 million at the global box office, "Striptease" is mostly remembered as a complete failure, especially with the six Razzies it won.
#17: “Double Dragon” (1994)
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Video game movies are usually dreadful, but “Double Dragon” is bad even based on those low standards. Mark Dacascos and Scott Wolf play teen brothers trying to keep their half of a Chinese talisman from Robert Patrick’s villainous Koga Shuko, who wants it for his nefarious purposes. The special effects aren’t bad for the time, and the production design, for a then-futuristic 2007 Los Angeles, is certainly eye-popping. But the acting could be better, and the film is so hyperactive, it’s exhausting to watch even five minutes of. We can’t even call it a guilty pleasure.
#16: “Body of Evidence” (1993)
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In the right role, Madonna can be a decent actress. But “Body of Evidence” is not the right role. Then again, even Meryl Streep might have trouble if given such a poor script. The pop star plays a woman charged in her lover’s death, who prosecutors say she killed in the bedroom. She soon gets involved with her married lawyer, played by Willem Dafoe, and things only get more nonsensical from there. “Body of Evidence” is trying so hard to be the next “Basic Instinct” or “Fatal Attraction,” but there’s nothing erotic or thrilling about this so-called erotic thriller. Julianne Moore, who plays Dafoe’s wife, has voiced her regret about making this film. We certainly don’t blame her.
#15: “The NeverEnding Story III: Escape from Fantasia” (1996)
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It's no wonder the "NeverEnding Story" series ended with this installment. The third film is what some would call absolute worst in fantasy storytelling. Bastian Balthazar Bux, now played by Jason James Richter, goes to high school and is threatened by a gang known as “The Nasties,” led by Jack Black’s Slip, who get their hands on the titular book. None of the whimsy and wonder of the first film is remotely present, replaced by ugly effects and general unpleasantness. It’s hard to imagine even the youngest of viewers being entertained by this. While it’s not actually never-ending, it sometimes feels like it.
#14: “Godzilla” (1998)
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Before it was released, the hype for the new “Godzilla” film was off-the-charts. Roland Emmerich, director of “Independence Day,” was reviving one of the most famous movie monsters of all-time. How bad could it be? “Godzilla” is the worst kind of summer blockbuster: a loud bore that cares about special effects at the expense of its human characters. Many fans and former Godzilla actors hated the new monster's design, earning it nicknames like GINO, or "Godzilla In Name Only." Though it seemed destined to kick off a new franchise, the poor reviews and underwhelming box office returns put an end to those plans.
#13: “On Deadly Ground” (1994)
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Steven Seagal has a rep for not being a particularly good actor, and apparently he’s about the same when it comes to directing. “On Deadly Ground” finds the former action star both in front of and behind the camera, with disastrous results. The plot involves Seagal’s environmental agent fighting against an evil oil corporation, led by Michael Caine’s ruthless CEO. Although that premise has potential for legitimate social commentary, in Seagal’s hands, it’s just an overly-violent and horribly directed mess, one that not even talented actors like Caine, R. Lee Ermey, and Billy Bob Thornton can save. We can give Seagal credit for one thing: he hasn’t directed anything since this.
#12: “Bio-Dome” (1996)
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Some comedies are stupid in a good way. Others, like “Bio-Dome,” are so far from that, it’s basically impossible to laugh. Pauly Shore and Stephen Baldwin play a pair of nitwits who get trapped inside the titular dome, and hilarity does not ensue. Unlike classic buddy comedy duos like Wayne and Garth or Bill and Ted, Shore and Baldwin are so obnoxious, you can’t help but feel bad for the scientists forced to go through the experiment with them. But we really pity anyone who was naive enough to pay for a ticket to this unfunny mess.
#11: “Street Fighter” (1994)
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The "Street Fighter" video game series is exciting and has stood the test of time. The "Street Fighter" movie is obnoxious and only gets worse with age. Jean-Claude Van Damme plays Colonel William F. Guile, who faces off against Raúl Juliá's evil General M. Bison, who plots to take over the world. The poor acting and wooden dialogue make the viewing experience less than enjoyable. Though Juliá is quite fun in his final film performance, "Street Fighter" once again makes the case that some things are just better off as video games.
#10: “The Avengers” (1998)
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No, you will not find Tony Stark here. A remake of the classic ‘60s British spy show, this major-budget production lost its way the moment the cameras started rolling. For 89 minutes, we watch as three amazing actors bore their way through what seems to be an incoherent MTV fever dream, or a rejected Miley Cyrus music video, with giant teddy bears and all. Director Jeremiah S. Chechik was able to bounce back with an impressive career in television, but you can practically see Sean Connery lose all faith in Hollywood and prepare for his decline. No wonder Warner Bros. refused to let critics preview this.
#9: “North” (1994)
“Worst Movie” lists are usually riddled with remakes and sequels, but “North” in all honesty almost looked like heartfelt “Forrest Gump”-style Oscar-bait. Since it was directed by the brilliant Rob Reiner and featured an incredible ensemble cast, the world was shocked when they finally laid eyes on this snooze-fest. Elijah Wood stars as North, a child genius who goes searching for more suitable parents than the ones he has as he travels around the world. Even with a $40 million budget, it was impossible to sit through such boring, forced humor, with each scene seemingly rushed and incomplete. We can certainly see why one particular critic “hated, hated, hated, hated, hated this movie.”
#8: “Super Mario Bros.” (1993)
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We can sometimes understand Hollywood executives. The “Super Mario Bros.” games spawned a huge franchise that had spread successfully to all forms of media. A major motion picture should be inevitable, and a huge hit to boot, right? Then why did they offer it to these people? In this science fantasy adventure comedy, Mario and Luigi are plumbers that travel to another dimension, and it’s a dinosaur-filled “Blade Runner” world that has no connection to the games whatsoever. It was as if the filmmakers had never seen a Nintendo game before, or as if Mario had been explained to the team by a 3-year-old.
#7: “It’s Pat” (1994)
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“Saturday Night Live” has turned many of its characters into movies, with very few hitting it big. After the success of the “Wayne’s World” films, someone had the brilliant idea to turn Pat, one of the most annoying characters in “SNL” history, into a film star. Maybe we can chuckle at a 2-minute sketch of the androgynous character, but 78 minutes of them? Although Julia Sweeney starred in and co-wrote the film, she was always reluctant to bring Pat to the big screen. The film was such a box-office disaster that it was pulled after its opening weekend…thankfully. Quentin Tarantino’s probably glad his screenwriting contribution went un-credited as well.
#6: “Speed 2: Cruise Control” (1997)
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Take one of the biggest blockbuster action successes of the mid-90s, remove the 2 best things about it - those being the bus and Keanu Reeves, of course - and what do you get? You get audiences wishing the bus had killed everyone in the first film! Oh, and let’s throw a boat into the mix, because why not? Nothing says thrilling like a slow-moving cruise ship. Although Willem Defoe was cheesy perfection as the villain, and the final crash scene, which made history as cinema’s most expensive stunt, was phenomenal, it seems nobody ever forgave director Jan de Bont for this “Speed” sequel… not even Hollywood.
#5: “Kazaam” (1996)
After you see Shaquille O’Neal demonstrate his acting chops in this kids’ flick, Michael Jordan’s performance in “Space Jam” may start to look Oscar-worthy. The only thing you need to know about “Kazaam” to make you run away in terror is that it’s about a genie that comes out of a boombox. Maybe the fantasy musical comedy is actually a metaphor for Shaq’s music career and how it should never have been unleashed onto the world. The b-ball player didn’t learn his lesson with this box-office bomb either, and brought us the equally disastrous “Steel” a year later.
#4: “Batman & Robin” (1997)
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What can be said about this film that hasn’t already been said? Director Joel Schumacher almost destroyed an entire genre with this campy nightmare. Although the previous flick, “Batman Forever,” had its merits, it’s almost blasphemous calling both of these movies sequels to the Tim Burton films that preceded them. It was as if the production team only watched the old ‘60s Batman show, and started filming. With George Clooney as arguably the most-miscast Batman in history, and everyone else hamming it up while trying to figure out if Schumacher was playing a joke on them, very few people found any humor in this slap in the face known as “Batman & Robin.”
#3: “Baby Geniuses” (1999)
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It’s shocking how a few toddlers can generate such hatred from audiences. With one single positive review on Rotten Tomatoes, “Baby Geniuses” is one of those comedic messes that completely embarrasses its major stars. It features Christopher Lloyd and Kathleen Turner as scientists who experiment on babies because they think that their babbling is a form of genius baby-language we cannot decipher. Its modest box-office return incomprehensibly inspired a sequel and a virtually unseen TV series. It also inspired us to shield our eyes for good…
#2: “Highlander II: The Quickening” (1991)
This one is so notoriously hated by “Highlander” fans that the filmmakers have tried to recut it over the years multiple times. Call that a major apology. The film is riddled with so many continuity errors, no logical connection to the previous film, and countless awkward comedic moments featuring Sean Connery that we forget we are supposed to be watching a sci-fi action flick about immortals chasing each other through time. It’s like seeing Gandalf stopping to get a makeover. The director himself walked out after the first 15 minutes of the premiere. And they expected us to watch it?
#1: “Mortal Kombat: Annihilation” (1997)
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Not that the original film was a classic or anything, but it was at least guilty-pleasure fun. There is so much b-movie straight-to-video-ness in the sequel that people were confused when they went to the movie theater. Denounced by “Mortal Kombat” co-creator Ed Boon, the video game adaptation was one of the worst reviewed films of all time. Starring another Caucasian portraying Lord Raiden, and other instances of white-washing, “Annihilation”’s terrible acting, script, effects, and completely boring fight sequences make us wish they would just finish us already. At least the planned sequel was cancelled - and we got the 2021 reboot, which made up for things in a lot of fans’ eyes.
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