20 Hidden Jokes in Kids Movies That Will RUIN Your Childhood
#20:The Boss’s Baby
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“How the Grinch Stole Christmas” (2000) Towards the beginning of this live action adaptation, we learn where babies come from in the world of Whoville. Thankfully, it’s not a Who sex ed lesson; Who babies float in from the sky in an umbrella basket or “pumbercellas”. It’s sort of like a variation on the old story of babies being delivered by storks. Innocent, right? But this film comes armed with plenty of adult appeal, and so as the first baby is discovered on the doorstep by its presumed father to be, we get a not so wholesome revelation. [“It looks just like your boss”] Most kids hopefully aren’t familiar with the concept of extramarital workplace affairs, but it definitely gets a laugh if you rewatch the film when you're older.
#19: ...Like Rabbits
10 Hidden Jokes in Kids Movies That Will Ruin Your Childhood
“Zootopia” (2016) Rabbits are known for many things. They’re cute and cuddly. They’re a popular symbol for speed. And - veering into slightly more adult territory- they’re also known to be seriously prolific procreators. Meaning… they have a lot babies and do it quickly. When Officer Judy Hopps calls Nick Wilde out for tax evasion, she throws in a little species-specific sexual innuendo. He’d previously called her a “dumb bunny” but this mental math shows that she is anything but, and before he can question her calculations, she reminds him that bunnies “are good at multiplying”. We adults see what you did there Disney… and it was funny stuff.
#18: Sugar Honey Iced Tea
“Madagascar” (2005) You can squeeze a lot of sexual innuendo and other types of adult jokes into movies for kids. Swearing however, is one of the big no-nos. Foul language is all but guaranteed to get you a PG-13 rating - higher if it’s sexually-related. But screenwriters are a creative bunch and so they usually manage to find nontraditional ways to fill the void left by the absence of swear words. In “Madagascar”, Chris Rock’s character, Marty the Zebra, says a series of words that, although innocent at face value, come together as a convenient acronym. “Sugar Honey Iced Tea?” “S. H. I. T.”. Those sneaky writers.
#17: Rex to Rachel
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“Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs” (2009) The third instalment in 20th Century Fox’s hugely successful Ice Age film franchise introduced Simon Pegg’s Buck, a one-eyed weasel with a habit of going after creatures much larger than himself. This dinosaur hunter is more than a little rough around the edges and seems utterly without mercy or remorse when it comes to his life calling. At one point, he regales Manny, Diego and company with tales of his exploits, and quite frankly, it sounds like something out of a gory horror film. [“the time I used a sharpened clam-shell to turn a T-Rex into a T-Rachel”] Though it’s played for a laugh, he’s talking about castrating a T-Rex. This is one messed up weasel.
#16: A Dirty Hoe
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“The Cat in the Hat” (2003) Like 2000’s “How the Grinch Stole Christmas”, this live action adaptation aimed to take a Dr. Seuss classic and turn it into a feature length film that would appeal to kids and adults alike. Unfortunately, it wasn’t nearly as successful as The Grinch, and although there’s a plethora of adult-oriented jokes, they’re far from subtle . . . After landing in the yard and threatening two dogs, Mike Myers’ titular Cat in the Hat looks at the garden tool he’s been brandishing and aggressively calls it a “dirty hoe” before smiling knowingly at the camera. Kids likely thought nothing of it, but for adults, it’s a surprisingly random and inappropriate bit of wordplay.
#15: Flying High
“The Santa Clause” (1994) In 1994, Tim Allen starred in this critically acclaimed Christmas film and box office success. It’s become something of a classic in the decades since and is undeniably a fun film for the whole family. Of course, like so many family films, it squeezes in a few jokes just for the adults. When Tim Allen’s character, Scott Calvin, starts flying, he reassures his son that’s he’s fine because of past experience. [“It’s OK, I’m used to it. I lived through the ’60s!"] Apparently Mr. Calvin did some hard partying and experimentation with drugs before becoming the suit and tie we meet in the film. Adding to the joke is the fact that Tim Allen was actually arrested for drug trafficking in the ‘70s.
#14: Busy Boy
“101 Dalmatians” (1996) Cruella De Vil has always been a memorable villain, but Glenn Close makes us really love to hate the character. She oozes malice and villainous charisma, delivering many a memorable line. There’s one statement in particular that children in the audience likely thought nothing of, but which surely raised the eyebrows of their accompanying parents. When she learns that Roger and Anita are expecting puppies in addition to a child, she says that Roger has been a “busy boy”. Is she suggesting Roger had something to do with the puppies? Gross Cruela, real gross.
#13: A Compromising Position
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“The Road to El Dorado” (2000) This film follows troublemakers Miguel and Tulio who, in 1519, travel from Spain to the New World armed with a map to the City of Gold. Naturally, nothing goes as planned, but being the conmen that they are, they usually manage to spin the unexpected in their favor. When a local woman by the name of Chel enters the picture however, things get even more complicated. It turns out that Chel can be just as manipulative as Miguel and Tulio. When she initiates a massage with Tulio, it quickly escalates to something far more suggestive off-camera. And based on the sounds, Tulio’s expression and their body positions, well, you get the idea.
#12: The Topless Woman
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“The Rescuers” (1977) Rumors abound about inappropriate content being snuck into Disney films, from the phallic towers in “The Little Mermaid” to that much-debated line from “Aladdin”. However, there’s nothing subjective about this adult addition to 1977’s “The Rescuers”. In 1999, a massive recall of VHS copies of the film was announced due to an inappropriate image which had been added to the film in post-production. Disney initially refused to say what the offensive image was, but word got out fast that it was a picture of a real life topless woman in an apartment window visible as our mouse protagonists Bernard and Bianca fly by. Incredibly, this was in the original version of the film.
#11: A Lemon Party
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“Cars 2” (2011) Pixar’s “Cars” franchise has never shied away from sliding in a few raunchy jokes for the adults. In the first film, there’s a deleted scene of a road sign for a “Top Down Truckstop” that advertises “ALL convertible waitresses”. In a world inhabited by automobiles, this is clearly intended as a topless bar/restaurant. Without a doubt the dirtiest joke in the entire series however, is the Lemon Party. This likely went right over the heads of most adult viewers. Lemonparty is a reference to an early 2000s shock website which depicted a bunch of old men having an orgy. We’d love to think that this was just a coincidence, but the internet has deemed that unlikely.
#10: A Castle That’s Compensating for Shortcomings
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“Shrek” (2001) Part of what’s made this beloved animated franchise so successful is its ability to balance kid-friendly jokes with adult-oriented references and knowing winks. With that being said, there are a few moments that might raise some eyebrows in hindsight. For example, there’s this scene that really makes it seem like Lord Farquaad is a little more than excited while looking at Princess Fiona’s picture. Thankfully, viewers can’t see any movement in the sheets . . . so maybe Shrek wasn’t so far off the mark when he made his locker room joke about a big castle for a little man. It might have just been a jab at Farquaad’s height . . . but we doubt it.
#9: Evil Desires
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“Hocus Pocus” (1993) There are number of jokes meant for adults in this classic Halloween film, like references to Max’s virginity and Emily talking about Alison’s “yabbos”. But there’s no moment more inappropriate than when the witches announce their desire for children. To be clear, they want to kill them to steal their youth, but this horny bus driver just sees it as an invitation to something else. He makes it clear that he’s more than willing to oblige the strange trio. The life of a bus driver can be a lonely one, so who knows, maybe he was just hoping for some quality conversation.
#8: A House with Female Anatomy
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“Monster House” (2006) So … who thought it was a good idea to let “Rick and Morty” creator Dan Harmon co-write the screenplay for a kids film? To be fair, this was years before he created “Rick and Morty”, or even “Community” for that matter, but still, the man isn’t exactly the kind to play it safe. This is the sort of joke that’s guaranteed to go over the head of pretty much every kid in the audience, but we suspect the parents who caught it choked on their popcorn or soda. “Monster House” is a solid, fun and often intelligent film, but this reference to the female anatomy was a risky inclusion.
#7: Performance Issues
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“Space Jam” (1996) Apparently in the world of “Space Jam”, talent is like energy. It can’t just be created out of nothing. And so in order to win this epic high stakes basketball game, the Monstars steal the talent of professional b-ballers Charles Barkley, Shawn Bradley, Patrick Ewing, Larry Johnson and Muggsy Bogues. Suddenly without the skills that made them stars, the players undergo a battery of physical and mental exams in this funny montage. The filmmakers managed to slide an adult joke into the mix when one doctor asks a player if he’s had other performance issues. Not cool Doc!
#6: Mr. Potato Head Doesn’t Like to Share
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“Toy Story 3” (2010) Pixar has never shied away from slipping adult jokes into their films, and for the most part, they play well. This line however, is so crude that we really hope it was accidental. In the third Toy Story film, the villainous Lotso removes the mouth of an understandably angry Mrs. Potato Head. Jumping to his wife’s defense, Mr. Potato loudly declares that “nobody takes my wife’s mouth!” Nothing wrong with that, right? But then he follows it up with the words “except me”. Literally, he might just be saying that he steals his wife’s mouth to get some peace and quiet, but it also evokes another image we cannot unsee.
#5: Sucked to Death
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“The Brave Little Toaster” (1987) This 1987 animated film had some heavy moments that likely left a lasting impression on you as a young child. The scene in the spare parts shop is horrific and the song “Worthless” comes paired with some similarly upsetting imagery. The clown ... was pure nightmare fuel. But nothing quite compares to the fate of the air conditioner. While his explosive final moments are likely what stuck with you, he also says something rather provocative to the vacuum cleaner before making his exit. When Kirby confronts the aggressive appliance, the AC asks if Kirby is going to “suck [him] to death”. That’s an uncomfortable choice of words.
#4: The Chef with a Tiny Little . . . Something
“Ratatouille” (2007) Another Pixar film, another joke that soars over the heads of younger viewers, while raising the eyebrows of their parents. When the bumbling and culinarily-challenged Linguini tries to come clean with Colette, he struggles to explain his situation with Remi the cooking rat. By his own admission, he’s not good with words, but boy does he ever misspeak here. He admits he has a “disturbing” secret, a “tiny little” . . . Before he can say “chef” Colette has already glanced straight down at his crotch. Owch. At least as embarrassing as the moment is, it’s not as gross as what Chef Skinner seems to be suggesting with this line about intimacy and vegetables.
#3: Diaper Humor
“The Rugrats Movie” (1998) In a list of all the places we didn’t expect to come across a circumcision joke, the 1998 Rugrats movie would be pretty high up there. But there it is nonetheless. In this musical number, a newborn baby is disappointed and outraged that he’s had his umbilical cord cut . . . but another newborn in the room looks down his own diaper and tells the first baby to consider himself fortunate. There’s nothing subtle about this reference, and we can’t help but wonder what kids made of it when they watched the scene.
#2: Nice Headlights
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“Cars” (2006) Alright, we can see how this was a tempting joke to make . . . even though it’s totally inappropriate. After a big race, rookie Lightning McQueen is bathing in the attention of the fans and cameras, when two gushing young girl cars burst through the crowd and introduce themselves as Mia and Tia. They’re his biggest fans, so what do they do? Pop up their headlights - and FLASH him. Get it? The arrogant McQueen is in heaven . . . but we’re guessing this one might have elicited more groans from the parents than laughs.
#1: Buzz Experiences Involuntary Wing Spring
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“Toy Story 2” (1999) There are lot of ways to show that characters in a kids’ movie are attracted to one another. After all, romance and attraction are perfectly natural. But this scene from the second Toy Story movie is more than a little brazen. When Buzz meets Jessie the Cowgirl, it’s clear that he’s into her, especially from the way he freezes when she puts her hand on his chest. But when he sees her in action, it proves too much and he “gets sprung” as shown by his wings popping out. It’s a strangely common trope in kids movies, also seen in “The Little Rascals” and arguably dating all the way back to 1942’s“Bambi”.
