Top 10 Anime That Could Never Be Made Today

One of those retro anime flicks that somehow avoids becoming a hentai by the narrowest of margins. Not that anyone really got deep enough into the plot to see any of the other gritty content, on account of the opening scene involving passionate bedroom action between our cocky detective and his new lady friend…only for her to suddenly transform into a spider hybrid, complete with a snapping maw and several rows of sharp teeth in some questionable areas. I mean, where can you really go from there? Certainly not towards any kind of remake!

Lucy’s bloody struggle in a world that wronged her is one of those dark and despairing series that really should have a full adaptation by now. It’s got a cult following, it’s mature themes certainly strike a chord, plus it has one of the most tragic anti-heroes in modern memory. What’s stopping it? Probably the impossibly high kill count, the countless decapitations, as well as an abuse sub-plot. It’s own darkness Is its own enemy when it comes to getting a second shot at the limelight.

This thing is a mini-miracle. Why? Because it’s a cop drama with some pretty slick, cell-shaded animation you’d think would go on to become a classic…if not for one particular scene. Turns out that in order to get this funded, Studio Arms had to ask publisher Green Bunny for help, who happened to make hentai for a living. Thus, we have the shoehorned scenes that are as gratuitous and detailed as you can possibly get. You’ve seen it. Don’t pretend you haven’t. As you can imagine, getting a helping hand from X-Rated distributors isn’t exactly a common practise these days.

If something as glorious as Interspecies Reviewers was cut from broadcast due to its mature content, then there’s no way in anime hell that something as blatantly fanservice driven as this would ever stand a chance. After all, everything is secondary to smut in this show, narrative included. Essentially it follows a female ninja roaming around as she absorbs the breast size of her enemies and adds it to her own, all the while all manner of lewd antics follow her and her pervy sidekick day in and day out. With none of the charm to hold up its gigantic bust, it wouldn’t be long before a second shot as this exploitive ninja parade of heaving cleavage was cut down.

#6: “Pom Poko” (1994)

Also in:

Top 20 Anime That Could Never Be Made Today

One of Studio Ghibli’s far more experimental flicks, there’s a lot to love about this fantastical take on the Japanese folktales surrounding Tanuki. Sure, the plot goes to all kinds of crazy places and makes no attempt to veil its pro-environmental messages, but come on, talking Tanuki have and always will be adorable! You want to know what’s not adorable? Seeing them swell their happy sacks to monstrous proportions so that they can be used as parachutes, or weapons to take down the police. Somehow, we just don’t see that flying nowadays.

Vulgar jokes combined with a not so subtle commentary on how repressing natural urges to obscene degrees is a terrible idea – this series was a gem. A very dirty gem, saturated in way too much of Anna’s love nectar. Personally we’d love to see a continuation of Blue Snow’s anarchist antics as she tries to bring erotic and r-rated content back into society, and yet we know that some groups would be up in arms for a show essentially prompting perv propaganda. Though to be fair Anna might have taken things a bit too far when she tried to have her wicked way with her bland bread protagonist against his wishes…

A tale of tragedies and triumph, an underdog’s desperate search for knowledge, Kintaro’s saga was truly one we’ll likely never see the likes of again…mainly due to the fact that every place he went to he ended up somehow enticing a busty beauty to such an extent they were willing to surrender it all just to get a piece of his golden boy. While it’s not that far removed from some of the ecchi content seen in today’s sleazier anime scene, we can see networks having some issue with how…vocal the ladies can get when it comes to their wanton desire.

#3: “Koi Kaze” (2004)

Also in:

Top 10 Anime Moments That Made You Die Inside

Brother-Sister relationships are nothing new to anime. It’s everywhere in the harem genre, it’s always being made fun of in comedies, or just being shamed for the icky and destructive subject it is. And then there’s this little anomaly; a series that portrays the folly and heartbreak that comes from two lonely souls who fall in love in earnest and are unable to suppress their desires…even though they’re blood-related. You feel such sympathy for these two even though you know this will never end well . With such a serious edge to it, we doubt we’ll see anything of its kind again, and that’s probably for the best.

Ultra-gory, ultra-violent, ultra-disturbing, this anime lives and breath shock value, especially if it involves humans betting torn apart in the most ludicrously brutal ways imaginable. What’s the plot? Does it really matter? Psychic girl meets homeless boy, illegal experiments, massacres ensues. While it's incoherent at the best of times, the sheer amount of depravity and body horror displayed is so obscene that there is no way something like this would be replicated. Even the most hardcore modern series have some kind of cap on how much blood and guts it can get away with showing. Something like this has zero filter, and zero chance of seeing any sort of resurgence.

Yeah, not sure we have to go into detail about how having a young student in love with her teacher and go to EXTENSIVE lengths to show it is…problematic. Seriously, how this got an original adaptation, we’ll never know. While they don’t cross all of the morally questionable lines, there are still scenes of Rin throwing herself at her teacher on numerous occasions, with her sole goal being to become his wife. Can you imagine the shitstorm this would cause if they tried to bring this back?!