Top 10 Celebrity Roasts

You might be wondering WHY Comedy Central decided to host a redneck roast, but perhaps the bigger question is WHY Marcia Brady ended up on stage. The answer? The Nebraskan comedian’s name is actually Daniel Whitney, and his Blue Collar stage character was torched in 2009 by a full cast of opening acts, including his own in the form of someone named Reno Collier. As always, Lisa Lampanelli proved that women can make a career in comedy by screaming and continuously referencing their ass, while the late Greg Giraldo asked the most important question of all.

Wait, don’t you have to be relevant in AMERICA to get your own Comedy Central roast? Aside from his surprising music career, David Hasselhoff is most famous for his association with KITT and tits, and somehow this was reason enough to organize a group of C-level comedians and Hulk Hogan in a room. Well, actually it was Hoff’s drunken meltdown that led to the affair, but even so, it allowed Gilbert Gottfried to remind America that he was alive and well, and definitely not in jail for a sketchy offense. Perhaps the biggest name of the event was Seth MacFarlane, who brought justice to millions of ‘90s adolescent men by revealing that Mitch Buchannon was indeed a “boner killer.”

Has there ever been someone more embarrassed to be at their own roast? Not only did none of the Chevy’s old pals from “Saturday Night Live” show up, but he seemed oblivious to the concept of a “roast.” In one of the bravest moments ever seen on television, Lisa Lampanelli took the stage and proceeded to skewer poor Paul Schaffer until his last strand of hair fell off. In the end, it was all-star roaster Greg Giraldo who set the room on fire, including Sally Jesse Raphael’s hair.

How do you outperform a living legend of outrageous acting? Well, just ask Betty White, because she KNOWS a thing or two about Captain Kirk’s little rocket man. Ok, maybe this roast was a bit on the “elderly” side with George Takei, Leonard Nimoy and Lisa Lampanelli, however Comedy Central asked a young homeless man named Jeffrey Ross to reflect on his memories of Farrah Fawcett. In the end, Andy Dick creeped everybody out as usual, while Carrie Fisher simultaneously destroyed Patton Oswalt’s memories of Princess Leia’s gold bikini.

Jimmy Kimmel hosted this classic roast, or as the comedians called it – “Who wants to visit the Playboy mansion?” In fact, there was so much ass-kissing going on that Jimmy Kimmel actually managed to get a girlfriend out of the ordeal, but only after Sarah Silverman shattered his confidence and flaunted her deep cleavage for the elderly Hef. By the end of the night, Ice-T tried to come up with a good reason for his appearance and thoroughly confused every white person in the room, including Mr. Hefner, who was still very much alive.

We know what you millennials are thinking: “Who the F is Bob Saget?” Well, aside from playing Danny Tanner on “Full House,” he’s actually performed his raunchy stand-up routine since the ‘70s, and he’s truly a comic’s comic. Meaning that any comic looks good after following Bob Saget. This 2008 roast was notable for the anti-comedy set by Norm MacDonald, and also for the voracious segment by Greg Giraldo, who metaphorically – AND poignantly - described Saget as the “genital wart on the cock of American culture.” Wait, isn’t that Andy Dick’s claim to fame?

Speaking of culture vultures, the almighty King of Douchebaggery was roasted in 2015, and rappers such as Snoop Dogg and Ludacris appeared to remind Biebs of a harsh fact: he’s white. With all due respect to Justin Bieber, it takes a lot of guts to endure such a fiasco, and the one and only Ron Burgundy showed up to express his support. However, it was Jeffrey Ross who asked the most important questions about Bieber’s career and brilliantly labeled the cocky kid as the “King Joffrey of Pop.” Belieb it.

Long before James Franco became America’s Modern Day Renaissance Man, he starred as the iconic James Dean. And if you ask Seth Rogen, it was a perfect fit. This 2013 roast featured an all-star cast of giggling potheads, all of whom served as the laugh track for Andy Samberg’s vicious takedowns. Yes, it’s always funny to poke fun at James Franco’s artistic achievements, but it’s even more hysterical when the President of Hollywood does it. While everybody loves the stoner brand of comedy that made Franco, Rogen and Jonah Hill famous, a cornrowed Jeffrey Ross reminded us that stand-up comedy is where it’s at.

The late Charlie Sheen will forever be known as THE bad boy of Hollywood. (Ahem) He’s still alive? WELL. Everybody thought Charlie Sheen would be dead by the time of his 2011 roast, but he managed to survive and was winning in his own unique way. In fact, Jeffrey Ross reminded him as such. Led by roastmaster Seth MacFarlane, a collection of equally troubled individuals questioned the “idea” of Charlie Sheen along with the idea that he might have a dead hooker or two in the basement. In all seriousness though, is Charlie Sheen really still alive?

Before we unveil our top pick, here are a few honorable mentions.
- Muhammad Ali
- Joan Rivers
- Flavor Flav
- Johnny Carson

She became an international sex symbol for two simple reasons: the success of “Baywatch” and the sex tape of all sex tapes. Oh, and also her large set of breasts. So was it a big surprise when this roast featured set after set of constant sex jokes? Of course not, and it was extraordinarily spectacular. Especially when a hammered Courtney Love appeared on stage along with the Queen of questionable sex comedy, Lisa Lampanelli. This 2005 roast was hosted by Jimmy Kimmel, and while most resorted to jaw-dropping sex jokes, it was Greg Giraldo who shook things up and claimed his place as the ultimate celebrity roaster.

Do you agree with our list? What is your favorite celebrity roast? For more mind-blowing Top 10s published daily, be sure to subscribe to WatchMojo.com.