Top 10 DUMBEST Changes in Death Note 2017

Despite its rather macabre premise, the original Death Note series did not draw any of its focus on the gruesome deaths of its victims. Instead, the hand of Kira is swift and just. His victims suffering a heart attack which serves as a sort-of calling card for the god of the new world. The Netflix adaptation must have seen a potential audience in the edgey teen department and so offered us some rather Final-Destination-esque death scenes. Now we’re not complaining because we’re squeamish – hell if anything these kills are laughable – but it just doesn’t seem to align with Light’s code of justice…however twisted it may be.

There’s a reason why people are still cosplaying our beloved idol turned killer in 2017 – and that’s because she was so endearing. Blissfully ignorant to her knight in shining armor’s cruel intentions, and displaying that sweet-as-sugar attitude, Misa Misa was cemented as one of the better anime heroines of the 2000s. So how does the adaptation handle that? Well by making Mia the antithesis of the original. She kills for the sake of killing, not for love – and seems to get off on it too. It’s a character we’ve seen done to death, and comes across as more of a Lady Macbeth rehash than anything else. Honestly, we wouldn’t be surprised if she was caught tipping the ol’ fedora…

The 80s spawned some absolute bangers, but ever since the debut of “Stranger Things”, there seems to be this weird trend of incorporating songs of this era into TV and Film. Let’s just get this on record: 80s Music does not equal aesthetic. In order to incorporate something as cliché as Berlin’s ‘take my breath away’ effectively, you at least need the right setting. From what we can tell, there’s no indication that the movie even takes place in the 1980s – so what is the reasoning behind the songs being used other than being trendy? Heaven knows the film would benefit from not having these unprovoked music-video segments.

In another spell of unnecessary modifications, the family structure of the Yagamis…uhh Turners… is completely shaken up. The absence of his sister Sayu is odd but the most notable of these changes is the Death of Light’s mama. It serves as a sort-of exposition for Light and his twisted moral compass – luring him into making his big kill on the cartoon-character mobster that did her in. But at the point in which Light acts upon this, he’s already taken a life and resolved to cleansing the world…and by time the deed is done that’s about all they explore of it – unless of course you think that ‘Hippy’ line by Jamesy-boy wasn’t complete fluff.

Honestly what was up with these two? Original Misa was loyal to no-end, first falling in love with the concept of Kira and then with Light, the man behind the mask. Light takes advantage of this by manipulating her to reach his goals and looking like a total POS at the same time. So… why not trade this extremely nuanced dynamic for some teen-romance bullshit? Yes, instead Light and Mia’s undying love for one another is banged into our skulls through the film in the form of sweet nothings and cringey sex scenes. Now you may argue “Light was playing her all along” like the ending suggests…but hold up, if he didn’t love her, why did he show her the note in the first place…and if he did love her why the FUCK did he kill her?

The movie opens up giving you the impression that L holds all the cunning and wit of the original…but oh how wrong you’d be to believe it. When faced with any sort of confrontation he crumbles like a bloody leaf. His near-tears expression can be seen when Watari is missing or when he contemplates using the note to off Timmy Turner - instead of coming up with another solution. He lacks the authority, adaptability and stoicism of Ryuzaki and instead, when he makes a boo-boo, he’s on the receiving end of a “you’ve been a very naughty boy” lashing. He may have been stupid enough to show his face to Light, but at least he does that squat-thing right guys???

If there’s one thing the adaptation can be praised for its Defoe’s brilliant performance as Ryuk. His chilling tones pierce our very souls from the moment he pops on screen, but here’s the problem – that’s not Ryuk. The role of the apple-eating death god is integral to the Death Note series – he is the enabler of Light’s desires but not the manipulator. In constantly having him goad kira, it essentially makes him the puppet-master – eliminating his role as the overseer and rendering all of Light’s actions pointless because its simply the will of Ryuk. But this is all turned on its head when we find out Light was the one who manipulated everything…meaning that when Light pretended to be mad at him for letting Misa kill the FBI agents, he knew the truth…and just took it like a bitch? Wha?

The original Death Note's recurring six minute and forty second rule meant that a victim only had that much time to play out the quote "humanly possible" actions leading up to his or her death. Not, you know, days. In the Netflix series, Light programs an elaborate series of events involving the spontaneous destruction of the ferris wheel, dictating how he and Mia fall and even a specific pages of the book itself getting ripped out and burned – and this we’re led to believe, is a lot more realistic than a shark in a toilet. Instead of being smart about the rules and having Light subtly manipulate situations, the Netflix film just straight up has it all play out in the laziest of manners.
And one more thing… If the rules let him force Watari into finding L’s name, why didn’t he just make him kill him? It’s not like the Death Note has stopped people killing other people in this film…

This is pretty much the reason why people hated the movie before it even came out. But some of us did give it the benefit of the doubt, cross our fingers, and hope for the best. Did it step up? Nah. Without sounding too weeaboo, in stripping the series of its Japanese setting it also loses a lot of its charm. Not just because of the alleged whitewashing but also because it instead falls into the category of high school horror, where our heroes are oh so teen-angsty and OH MY GOD ITS ALMOST PROM. On top of that, it’s hard to pinpoint why they decided to send L to Japan…or why every one of the extras in that scene was white…

Light Yagami: Cool, Composed, Meticulous, Fearless…
Light Turner: [Broll of Light Screaming]
Yes, indeed we knew from the get-go that we were bathing in a whole new ‘light’, but did we ever guess it’d be this bad? Turner makes dumb decision after dumb decision. He shows Misa his death note without hesitation, he NEVER denies he’s Kira, He even straight up TELLS L that there’s a page in the Calculus text book.
Death Note 2017 explores the idea of “What if a complete cretin found a Death Note”, and if the rumors of a sequel are true… Mr. Turner would realistically already be behind bars in the opening scene…if he’s not already bloody dead.
You stupid bastard.