Top 10 Movies That Make You Not Want To Have Kids
What a Brat! Join http://www.WatchMojo.com as we count down our picks for the Top 10 Movies that Make You not Want to Have Kids. For this list, we're looking at films that make the prospect of rearing children an off-putting proposition in any number of ways.
Special thanks to our user Matthew Thomas for submitting the idea using our interactive suggestion tool at http://www.WatchMojo.comsuggest
#10: “Joshua” (2007)
This psychological drama-thriller stars the exceptionally talented Sam Rockwell and Vera Farmiga as the parents of two children, one of which is an innocent baby girl, the other of which is their suit-clad son whom they love, but should really fear. This is demonstrated by the fact that young Joshua develops the type of sibling rivalry with his newly born sister Lilly that Stephen King could’ve written: basically, anyone who gets in the way has to go. Willing to kill and lacking any love for his parents, Joshua is a monster discovering what he is capable of – and thanks to this movie, which is also known as “The Devil’s Child,” by the way - we don’t want to know what it would be like to be his parents.
#9: “Eraserhead” (1977)
The filmography of David Lynch is filled to the brim with strange people and odd situations, but for anyone contemplating parenthood, “Eraserhead” really showcases what could be a nightmare. The film’s main character, Henry Spencer, is an odd man with a distinctive hairstyle who becomes the parent of a mutant offspring. The child is a horror to observe, refuses all food, cries day and night and drives its mother to abandon it - with Spencer being the only one who tries to care for it. Watching this tale of a monstrous being under the care of a parent who is helpless to aid it is sure to make you rethink a couple of things.
#8: “Village of the Damned” (1960)
After everyone in the village of Midwich falls unconscious, every fertile woman in the community soon becomes pregnant. A few short months later, all of them give birth - on the same day. The resulting children all share the same hair color and a number of other characteristics as they grow older; for example, they walk in sync and develop powers. Using their abilities, the offspring become more brazen and begin to exert control over their surroundings as well as the nearby people who clearly fear them. As adults and especially parents, we are supposed to protect children… but what if they’re emotionless, mysteriously conceived, telepathic killers?
#7: “Knocked Up” (2007)
When Ben and Alison meet in a club and go home together, all they had in mind was a night of sexy-fun time. However, when they discover their tryst has resulted in a pregnancy, everything changes. They attempt to turn their one-night stand into something resembling a relationship, but instead they spend the entire pregnancy failing miserably as a couple. They may think forcing themselves into this arrangement for the sake of the baby is the right thing to do, and they might even get something of a happy ending, but they’re such a terrible match we find it hard to agree. And it also makes us think twice about passing on our genes.
#6: “Mildred Pierce” (1945)
This film tells the tale of a mother and daughter with a strained relationship, to put it lightly. Mildred - the mother in question - does everything she can to give her daughter the la-de-da life-style she feels entitled to… but it’s never enough for Veda. When Mildred takes a job as a waitress, she is mocked, when she makes it big with a chain of restaurants, she is disrespected, and when she trades it in for a loveless marriage with a well-connected playboy, she is betrayed. No matter what she is given, Veda continues to demand more and more from her mother, which she’ll get through extortion, murder, and, well, just being a spoiled brat.
#5: “The Good Son” (1993)
When this film came out, Macaulay Culkin was known as that cute kid from “Home Alone”. So anyone who went into this movie looking for a similar story and role from him was in for a shock. A pre-teen who appears – at first - as a sweet and innocent young boy, Henry is able to evade suspicion while carrying on loathsome acts, like causing highway pileups and killing his baby brother. When he makes plans to kill his cousin Connie, his evil nature is revealed. We then find him on a cliff top in a life or death showdown with his mother. How strong do you think your parental instincts would be in that scenario?
#4: “We Need to Talk About Kevin” (2011)
If you enjoy feeling unsettled, you should definitely check this one out. From birth, Kevin and his mother never bonded the way we’ve been programmed to expect a child and parent to connect, and though she loves him, caring for him is difficult for her. After hiding his true nature from everyone but his mother (who guesses the truth), it is only once the titular character leaves his father, little sister and several students in body bags that anyone else sees the real Kevin. Of course, by then, everyone is also blaming his mother for his actions… as if she doesn’t have enough to deal with already.
#3: “The Omen” (1976)
When a couple suffers the horrible loss of having their child die moments after he is born, the boy’s father adopts a child, Damien, and passes him off as their own to the mother. Soon, after black dogs remain outside their home, thorns grow out of nowhere, and Damien’s nanny commits suicide, it becomes clear that something is seriously wrong. Ultimately revealed to be the Antichrist, the boy rips his adopted parents’ life to shreds and brings death to nearly everyone they encounter. As far as adoption goes this is pretty much the worst-case scenario.
#2: “Problem Child” (1990)
Wait, wait, wait; this is supposed to be a comedy? Another adopted son that torments his unsuspecting parent, Junior is not the spawn of Satan - he is just one of the biggest brats ever put on film. He’s ultimately revealed to be acting out because of the many, many times he has been abandoned by prospective parents but, really, does that make it any better? Sure, it all works out in the end, but just the thought of sharing a life with this annoyingly voiced, horrifically behaved child is enough to put many off breeding altogether.
Before we reveal our top pick, here are a few honorable mentions.
“Dennis the Menace” (1993)
“Cheaper by the Dozen” (2003)
“Friends with Kids” (2011)
“Children of the Corn” (1984)
#1: “Rosemary’s Baby” (1968)
Rosemary Woodhouse is a beautiful, intelligent young woman and her husband Guy is a struggling actor keen to be a daddy. Things head south, however, when they move into a new apartment building and make friends with the locals. Soon, Rosemary has a feverish nightmare of being raped by a demon in front of Guy. Unsure if the encounter was real or not, she later finds out she is pregnant. But the pregnancy is troubled and she eventually gives birth to Adrian, who turns out to be the spawn of Satan and upon which her cult member neighbors have sinister designs. While the child’s arrival means untold riches for the couple, it’s hard to say if the cost – and the consequences - are worth it.
Do you agree with our list? What movie puts you completely off having kids? For more kid-friendly Top 10s published daily, be sure tosubscribe to WatchMojo.com.