Top 10 Worst Movie Villain Plans EVER

THAT is your master plan? Welcome to WatchMojo, and today we’re counting down our picks for the top ten Worst Villain Plans.

For this list, we’ll be looking at not necessarily the most evil, but the dumbest villain plans in movies. These plans can be ill thought out, doomed to fail, or just flat-out nonsensical.

This is certainly one of the most over-the-top Bond films out there. And that’s saying something. You’ve got invisible cars, Bond surfing a tidal wave, DNA replacement therapy, and of course, a massive satellite that can shoot beams of solar energy at the Earth. The main villain, Gustav Graves, plans to shoot this solar energy at the Korean Demilitarized Zone in the hopes of allowing North Korea to invade South Korea. What a horrible, horrible idea. For one thing, what is guaranteeing the North’s success in this invasion? And surely South Korea’s allies would immediately come to their rescue? Graves’s father tries to tell him that his brilliant plan will only result in a devastating nuclear war, but of course Graves doesn’t listen.

“Blade” is a great vampire movie, but it has one really shortsighted villain in Deacon Frost. Dare we even say . . .stupid? So, Deacon’s big plan is to turn everyone on Earth into vampires. That’s certainly a scary threat, and it makes for a suitably apocalyptic story. But if all the humans on Earth were turned into vampires, what would the vampires eat? And yeah, maybe he planned on keeping bags of blood or humans in cold storage, but that limited supply would run out eventually. Isn’t Deacon just ensuring the extinction of his own race with this inane plan?

Plans that begin with “let’s start a nuclear war” are never well thought out. Sebastian Shaw’s maniacal proposal is to instigate a nuclear war between the United States and Russia so the mutants can rule the world. There are just so many things wrong with this, we don’t even know where to start. Wouldn’t a nuclear war also kill the mutants? Even if they’re immune to radiation, they probably aren’t immune to nuclear vaporization. And say he was successful, and the mutants lived. So what? They would reign over a nuclear wasteland, be forced to live through a nuclear winter, and would be cut off from most food supplies. Talk about perplexing.

Voldemort needs to kidnap Harry and steal some of his blood. So, they get Barty Crouch, Jr., kidnap Mad-Eye Moody, brew a years’ supply of Polyjuice potion, have Crouch infiltrate Hogwarts, teach DADA for a year, manipulate the goblet, push Harry in the right direction throughout the tournament, and turn the trophy into a portkey. Whew! Why not just enchant a pen or something? Maybe a hair brush? Or how about a different and easier impersonation for Barty? It just doesn’t make a lot of sense as a nefarious plot. This whole extended contrivance just seems like a whole lot of effort for not very much.

Jerry Lundegaard needs a substantial amount of money, so he orchestrates to have his own wife kidnapped. The plan is to get his rich father-in-law to pay the ransom and he’ll give some to the kidnappers while keeping the rest. It’s a horribly stupid and incredibly dangerous plan, and it goes about as well as you’d expect. There are also numerous warning bells that Jerry ignores, like the fact that his criminal connection brings along an unidentified companion who isn’t properly vetted vouched for. Sure enough, said companion blows the entire operation, out of sheer stupidity and carelessness. These guys make for hilariously terrible criminals. But then again, that’s the point.

Man, the Batman movies really went off the rails. First was “Batman Forever,” which saw the Riddler making himself smarter with, y’know “brainwaves” and so forth. And then there was the wildly infamous “Batman & Robin.” This movie squandered two fantastic villains in Mr. Freeze and Poison Ivy with groan-worthy one-liners and laughable motivations. Freeze was going to cover the world in ice because he was mad about his dying wife? Why? And Ivy was going to repopulate it with mutant plants? Again, why? To rule together as“Adam and Eve-il,” as Freeze embarrassingly calls them? But there’d be no one to rule, and these two have very different motivations. This movie is legendary silly.

Most people praise the writing and performance behind Hans Gruber. He was certainly a different kind of action movie villain – stylish, cultured, and wickedly intelligent. Well, maybe not so much that last one. What on Earth was his escape plan? First off, was he hoping on stuffing all his henchmen and the numerous duffel bags of bearer bonds in that tiny little ambulance? And even if some henchmen had “accidents,” they’re still leaving behind an empty vault. Surely when the authorities investigate the building and find an empty vault, they’ll immediately suspect Hans and his team – especially if there are no bodies or proof that they died in the explosion?

In the middle of Sam Raimi’s “Spider-Man,” the Green Goblin kidnaps Spidey and proposes that they team up. The way he sees it, they form an alliance and “create” things together, or keep battling and kill innocent civilians in the process. But what exactly does he plan on creating? What does he hope to accomplish with Spider-Man? Some type of dictatorial power? Destroying New York? And even if they succeeded, surely the authorities would have something to say about it? Spider-Man and Goblin are exceptional men, but men, nonetheless. In a battle between them and the United States Army, our money is on the latter.

Bond villains always have big plans. As noted, Gustav wants to destroy the Demilitarized Zone. and Goldfinger wants to irradiate all the gold in Fort Knox. And Elliot Carver wants to start a war between the United Kingdom and China. Why? So his media empire will be granted broadcasting rights from the new government in China. It’s a stupid motivation, but it’s even dumber when you think about the implications. Like Gustav, Elliot’s entire plan hinders on a predicted outcome – in this case, the British winning the war. And if that fails? Also, surely the respective countries would call on their allies for aid, and in that case, instigate a potential nuclear war. What good is his media empire in a nuclear wasteland?

The more modern Superman movies don’t exactly have the greatest of villains. If Zod’s senseless political machinations in “Man of Steel” weren’t weird enough, we also got the complete mess that was Lex Luthor’s scheme in “Batman v Superman.” Many things have been written about Luthor’s shockingly incoherent plan, like the fact that it’s needlessly complex and requires an ungodly amount of luck, from the bomb not being discovered to manipulating the heroes into battling. It’s stupidity in the guise of exalted intellect. And in the end, Lex creates Doomsday to go after Superman. Why not just do that in the first place and be done with it? And hey Lex, what happens to you if Doomsday wins?