Top 20 Best Coming Out Scenes in Movies

Living in 1980’s Ohio, Eric comes to terms with his sexuality at his summer job, where he becomes friends with his lesbian manager, Angie, and falls for a college boy named Rod. When school starts back up again, he changes his hairstyle and buys a new wardrobe, fully leaning into his newfound orientation. This aesthetic transformation makes his parents suspicious, but it’s not until the film’s end that he actually comes out to his mother. He debates telling her it was all a phase, but ultimately decides the truth is better than fiction. Her response? She doesn’t quite know how to handle the news beyond that affirmation, but she holds him close and tries her best to understand.

Olaf “Gunn” Gunnunderson may be out as gay to his peers, but he still hasn’t worked up the courage to tell his parents. He decides to finally do the deed at Christmas, while his boyfriend, Nathan, and his parents sit around him at the dinner table. At first it seems like his parents may have a negative reaction, as they silently move around the table and exchange glances, but then it’s revealed that they were betting on his sexuality the whole time! Years prior, Gunn’s parents had bet on whether or not he was gay and his mom won with his coming out. After laughing about the situation, the pair comfort their son, telling him he’s an honest man and reassuring him that they love him.

Sometimes figuring out your sexuality isn’t as easy as going from point A to point B - a fact that Alex Truelove knows all too well. The protagonist of “Alex Strangelove” originally thinks that he may be bisexual, and tests this theory by sleeping with a girl at a party. The experimental encounter leads to an understandably awkward situation with his girlfriend, Claire, but finally confirms his lack of attraction to women. A realization that’s only reinforced by the sudden recollection of a traumatic moment in his childhood. Claire finds Alex shortly after, and he says he’s gay out loud for the first time. When she finally finds the words to respond, she’s initially defensive, but eventually comes around to accepting their new dynamic.

It’s no surprise that “Latter Days” was controversial upon release. The film, which is about a closeted gay missionary, only screened at nineteen theaters, and was constantly under threat of protest. Nonetheless, its depiction of gay love continues to ring true for many formerly-religious members of the LGBTQIA+ community. The movie’s most memorable scene comes around the halfway point, after one of Aaron’s fellow missionaries is badly injured. His gay neighbor, Christian, comforts him with a hug… which then leads to a kiss between the two men. Aaron has barely accepted his sexuality at this point, but is forcibly outed when his roommates walk in on the intimate moment. While Aaron’s parents and church cast him out, Christian’s found family welcome him with open arms.

Before someone can come out to other people, they must first come out to themselves, and this scene from “But I’m a Cheerleader” perfectly illustrates that lightbulb moment in its protagonist, Megan. Although Megan’s parents send her to True Directions in the hopes that it makes her straight, the conversion therapy camp ends up having the opposite effect. Surrounded by other gay and lesbian teenagers, she’s finally able to accept herself as a lesbian or, as she exclaims, a “homosexual!” She falls in love with a girl named Graham and, after a very public display of affection at their graduation ceremony, her parents reluctantly begin to come around to their daughter’s sexuality.

Alike’s turbulent home life makes it difficult to find the right time to come out. Near the end of “Pariah,” an argument between her parents about her father’s alleged infidelity turns into an argument about her style of dress and sexuality. Alike’s father tells her to deny her mother’s assertion that she is a lesbian, but instead she confirms it. In response, her mother gets violent. The traumatic scene is a harrowing reminder of an unfortunate reality for far too many in the community. Thankfully, Alike is able to escape her bad situation, and chooses to forge her own path as her authentic self.

Joe doesn’t like to wear dresses - a fact he makes clear every time he’s told to put one on. After years of playing dress-up, he finally hits his limit, and tells his dad that he’s not a girl. His father, Troy, is initially taken aback by the assertion, thinking that Joe must mean he’s a “tomboy,” but Joe is adamant that he’s just as much of a boy as his father is. Joe may not know the word “transgender,” but his passionate plea for acceptance is enough to convince Troy that his child is serious. With so few trans coming out stories in film and television, the combination of Troy’s support and Sasha Knight’s authentic performance feels like a breath of fresh air.

When Bobby’s brother, Ed, finds him in his room with pills strewn across the floor, he expects the worst. Thankfully, Bobby couldn’t go through with taking the pills, but still has a huge weight on his shoulders. He fears that he’s going to Hell for reasons he’s afraid to tell his family. After a short but emotional conversation, Bobby’s brother finally coaxes him into saying what’s bothering him - he’s gay. Bobby insists that the secret stay between them. Ed promises, but immediately tells their mother about the conversation. Although Ed’s outing of his brother is well-intentioned, it directly causes a downward spiral for the protagonist from which he never recovers, epitomizing the dangers of outing someone to an unsupportive parent against their will.

When Jamie’s crush, Ste, winds up in a bad situation, Jamie’s mother allows him to sleep in their home. Without an extra bedroom, the two are forced to awkwardly share a bed. On the second night, Jamie gives Ste a massage and the two get to talking. Jamie reassures Ste that he’s not ugly. After a period of tense silence, Jamie kisses Ste. Ste asks if Jamie thinks he’s queer, to which Jamie replies With no further elaboration needed on either boy’s sexuality, they fall asleep in each other’s arms. The interaction feels incredibly natural, and proves that you don’t have to have things fully figured out to come out.

Sometimes coming out is a big deal. Sometimes it’s more casual. Throughout “ParaNorman,” Courtney makes no secret of her crush on Mitch. It appears as if the movie’s leading up to the two being romantically paired by the end, but when she finally asks him to go out, the audience is thrown a huge curveball. Mitch is gay! He agrees to hang out with Courtney (whom he believes is named “Cathy”), but adds that she’s going to love his boyfriend. Courtney may be disappointed by this revelation, but we’re delighted by such nonchalant representation in a children’s movie!

No, this movie isn’t about the popular California-based burger chain. It’s about Howard, a small-town Indiana high school teacher who’s outed at the Oscars by a former student. Due to late-90s ignorance, bedlam erupts, leaving Howard to deny the claim at every turn. Only, he really is gay, and can’t seem to admit it to himself until he’s standing at the altar with a woman. So, instead of saying “I do,” he says… Sure, not the best time to come out with it, but it proves to be something of a relief, and something he might not have been able to do had he not been lip-locked by a hunky Tom Sellick a few scenes prior.

Strange as it may seem, we really should be saying “Academy Award Nominee Dennis Quaid,” because he absolutely kills it alongside Julianne Moore in a movie about a ‘50s housewife who discovers her husband is gay. Dropping in unexpectedly at the latter’s office after hours, Moore’s Cathy Whitaker is shocked to see her husband with another man and promptly runs home. There, the two have an appropriately tense moment where Quaid’s Frank admits to having had incidents when he was younger. Not finding the exact words, Frank is unable to come out completely, and it’s this inner turmoil and emotional resonance that makes this such a powerful scene.

A sex worker who struggles with crippling bouts of narcolepsy, River Phoenix’s Mike Waters has a constrained relationship with sexuality and love. After sleeping with various clients earlier in the film, Mike finally has a tender moment with his friend Scott when they reach the titular state. Sitting by a campfire, Mike takes a quiet moment to reflect upon what it would mean to love someone without being paid for it. While Scott says that he only sleeps with men for money, and doesn’t think that two men can love each other, Mike maintains that he loves him anyway, as much as it hurts. It’s a heart-wrenching scene, one that’s elevated by the agitation going on underneath Phoenix’s nuanced performance.

Unable to come to grips with her nascent bisexuality, Jessica keeps her relationship with Helen a secret. However, when that reticence puts a strain on their relationship, she can’t hide her emotions. Comforted by her mother - who’s previously tried to set her up with men - Jessica gets the catharsis she needs without having to say very much at all. In a touching scene, the elder Stein woman is able to infer the subtext, and gives Jessica her approval to be with Helen. The two then hug, as Jessica is finally able to accept and embrace who she really is.

Coming out can be even more difficult when it conflicts with a previously established religious belief, and more difficult still when family members struggle to understand for the same reason. In this biographical drama based on a memoir, Jared has it especially hard when the classmate who assaulted him outs him to his Baptist parents. Initially, Jared is defensive and denies it. But then he storms into the kitchen and tells his parents the truth. It’s an especially sober moment, one that leaves his parents speechless and in shock. Unfortunately, things would only get worse for Jared, who’s later forced into an abusive conversion “therapy” program. But in this brave moment, he refuses to compromise his honesty.

This movie has so many coming out scenes, we hardly knew where to begin. In fact, we might have more in store for later. For now, though, we simply had to appreciate this straightforward coming out that sees the titular Simon confide in his friend Abby. Feeling secure talking about intimate things, Simon pulls over the car and does what he’s been dreading the entire film. And we’ve gotta say, Abby’s reaction is spot on; unflinching but not making a big deal out of it as the two come closer together. Unfortunately, he’s unable to come out on his own terms to his other friends later on, but Simon definitely deserved this win while it lasted.

Having your parents track you down on prom night to prevent you from having sex would be the worst. But fortunately Sam’s situation is a little bit different. Convinced that she’s a lesbian and that she’ll reluctantly give up her virginity to her male date, Sam’s father Hunter barges into her hotel room expecting the worst. Fortunately Sam has better judgment than he thinks, as her date has already left. But the encounter leads to a surprisingly tender moment. After Hunter apologizes for his behavior in the wake of his divorce to Sam’s mom, Sam takes the opportunity to do something she’s never done. Of course Hunter already knows, but her official coming out brings the two together in a way that’s funny and sweet.

Through the narration of Ewan McGregor’s character, we learn that his father only came out after his mother’s death. They’d been married for forty-four years. Being a snippet of a memory, it’s a quick coming out scene, but the alternate remembrances and takes featuring Christopher Plummer lighten the moment so that it matches the quirky humor of the film. Not only that, but it sets up Hal’s transformation in his final years into what he’s always wanted to be, and is part of a performance that would win Plummer the Oscar for Best Supporting Actor.

Kevin and Chiron’s abbreviated romance begins on a beachfront at night. The two joke around, but the talk soon turns introspective and sees Kevin put his hand on Chiron. The moment quickly turns romantic as the two share a kiss, ending with Kevin giving Chiron his first sexual experience. While neither verbally come out per se, they’re able to express such feelings to each other that they never could to their peers. It’s a passionate scene, and one that’s made all the more emotion in light of their subsequent falling out and reunion.

Told ya we had more in store. While this scene is by no means the climax, it certainly feels like it since the whole coming-out-to-your-parents thing was hilariously established in the movie’s intro. Taking place on Christmas morning, Simon gives his parents perhaps the greatest gift of all by letting them know a side of him they hadn’t previously. While his mother plays it cool, his father tries to hide his emotions with ill-timed humor. While it’s not the most joyous reveal, it proves especially cathartic later on when Simon speaks to his father privately, who now can’t hold back the tears. This time they embrace, with his father saying he wouldn’t change anything about Simon. Great, now we’re crying too.