Top 30 Worst Product Names Ever

Top-30-Worst-Product-Names-Ever

Welcome to WatchMojo, and today we’re counting down our picks for those product names that sound ridiculous, are fraught with innuendo or are just plain offensive.

#30: Pocket Fisherman

This is one of those product names that no doubt bring to mind multiple things instead of what the product actually is. Is a Pocket Fisherman an actual little dude who resides in your pocket and loves to fish? Or is it a lesser-common euphemism in the same vein as “pocket pool?” The answer…. It’s neither. The Pocket Fisherman is a compact, foldable, all-in-one fishing rod that at about 5 x 5 inches can technically fit into a large pocket. The as-seen-on-TV product has been around since 1972, so they must be doing something right. Just not the name.

#29: Vegetarian Swallow Balls

This one just leads to more questions than answers. Like, what are Swallow Balls? Do swallows actually even have testicles? And if so, do people eat them? And if they do, are they so popular that a vegetarian version was needed? And we assume we’re not alone in Swallow Balls being just too close to Schweddy Balls to not elicit a giggle and a smirk from “SNL” fans the world over. We’ve also all seen enough TV news bloopers to know that the word “swallow” alone is enough to get people going.

#28: Pee Cola

Obviously the idea of urine cola sounds completely unappetizing and the question then becomes who on earth would name their drink Pee Cola? The answer… someone in Ghana. Pee cola is a popular soft drink bottled and sold in West Africa’s second-most populous country. From what we could gather the word “pee” in Ghana is a local expression that means “very good.” And while Very Good Cola makes a lot more sense - there is one little fact that we find very curious when questioning how this product name exists. It’s one thing when an English word has a different meaning in another language. But how do explain this difference in meaning when the official language of Ghana is….. English?

#27: Booty Goo

We get it. This diaper rash ointment is goo you put on your baby’s bottom to get rid of the rash and make them feel better. But just because the name makes sense doesn’t mean it’s a good choice. You have to be careful - especially when you have the word “booty” in there. Because, while Booty Goo can be ointment goo that goes on a baby’s booty - it can just as easily (ask Urban Dictionary) be goo that comes out of a booty. And no one wants any product that makes them think about…that.

#26: Lovesac

The Lovesac company makes modular furniture and foam-filled bean bag-like sacs that - we assume - you’ll love. The sacs were how the company started. And sure, telling people they will love their sacs in the company name might sound like a good idea - and it obviously did to founder Shawn D. Nelson back in 1995. But how did Nelson (or any of his friends) not also see the obvious innuendo immediately… That being that the other “lovesacs” aren’t modular - and they are things that no man EVER wants to sit on. And this innuendo is made even more giggle-worthy in their unpacking videos when Nelson himself tells us that all we need to do to get our Lovesac out is to unzip the zipper.

#25: Brother P-Touch

Here’s a simple word of advice. If your company name is “Brother,” try not using the word “touch” in any of your product names. In this case we’re talking about the Brother P-Touch label maker. Which - now that we think of it - why did they call it the “touch” anyway? Come on, the thing uses physical buttons. It’s not even a touch screen. And while the “Brother” and the P-Touch next to each other is uncomfortable, it’s even problematic without the “Brother.”And last but not least, how are you supposed to tell this is a label maker from the name alone? Enjoy trying to give this as a gift without doing some serious explaining.

#24: Burning Love Pouch

How could any product name associated with an Elvis Presley song be a bad idea? When that song is “Burning Love” and you go ahead and put the word “pouch” after it, that’s how. The Burning Love company handmakes all of its sleeves, bags and accessories out of fine merino wool and Italian leather. They make, among other things, keychains, iPad sleeves, wallets and…. pouches. And while a Burning Love Pouch is a bad name, just the main company name “Burning Love” makes us think more about penicillin than fine leather accessories.

#23: GIMP

Have you ever used the free, open-source graphics editor, GIMP and thought about how unfortunate it is to have a name now so strongly associated with the leather-covered character in “Pulp Fiction?” Well, the truth is that the first iteration of GIMP came out after the Quentin Tarantino movie. The developers specifically added a G-word to the front of the product’s name in order to create the acronym GIMP as a direct reference to the film. If you have some photo editing to do you should definitely bring out the GIMP… just make sure it’s the right one.

#22: Barfy Burgers

When it comes to meat and Argentina, the country is widely known to have some of the highest-quality, best-tasting beef out there. But they also have Barfy burgers. Find yourself in an Argentinian grocery store in the frozen food section and you’re likely to see a box of Barfy burger patties. From what we can tell, it’s not like “barfy” is a Spanish word that means something other than what it sounds like - so we’re not quite sure what to make of it. Other than the fact that a food product should never have a name that reminds one of the results of food poisoning.


#21: Douchebags

What does Db mean to you? While most companies would be insulted were you to call their product douchebags, that isn’t the case for this “Db” company started in 2009 by a Norwegian engineering student and a Swedish freeski fan. And why wouldn’t the name insult them you ask? Well, because before the company was Db it was actually Douchebags. That’s right, the two guys created an adjustable, lightweight ski bag and called their company (and said ski bag product) Douchebags. It was only once the company got bigger and began making its way into America that they officially changed to Db. Also, the original Douchebag is now called the Snowroller (honestly, we might prefer Douchebag).

#20: Nad's

This is one of the biggest products on our list, so it would seem that unfortunate naming hasn’t held it back. Created and founded in 1992 by an Australian woman whose daughter wanted to wax her arms with less pain, it’s gone on to become one of the world’s leading hair removal products. However, “nads” is a slang term often used for something else - popularly used in sentences such as “oh man, that guy got hit right in the nads!” The success of Nad’s as a business just goes to show that a great product can indeed overcome a questionable name.

#19: TrekStor iBeat Blaxx

It’s hard to believe this name was even considered. In the 2000s, German company TrekStor came up with an idea for what to call their new MP3 player. And the outlandishly bad name they went with sounded like it was making light of prejudice and violence. Shortly after TrekStor was called out for its horrendously bad decision, the company issued an apology and promptly renamed their product. According to the company’s vice president, it was named “blaxx” because of its “elegant black piano finish.” But… it’s still mind-boggling that they missed the obvious problem there - even if English wasn’t their first language.

#18: Reebok Incubus

What do women want to wear on their feet? In the mid 90s, Reebok’s marketing team answered this question with: demonic spirits who take advantage of women in their sleep. In 1996, the company launched athletic footwear for women called “Reebok Incubus.” The male counterpart of a succubus, an incubus is a mythological demon said to prey on women at night while they’re unconscious. Clearly, no one bothered to research what the name actually meant. At least, we hope that’s the explanation. When an ABC News report broke the story, Reebok had to apologize and change the name.

#17: Dry Sack Sherry

“Dry” is an interesting adjective. When you use it to describe skin, you think of unpleasant things like bitter winter months. But when you combine the word “dry” with wine, you think of an enjoyable adult beverage. So we can see why Williams & Humbert wanted to use it to describe its sherry. But then they added the word sack. In this product’s defense, “sack” is actually a term that was historically used in the winemaking profession to describe certain fortified wines. But modern audiences are likely going to be too distracted by the words “dry” and “sack” together to recognize the historical meaning behind the name.

#16: K.U.M Hair Care

It doesn’t matter if you spell it with a “k” or a “c” - it comes out sounding the same when you say it out loud… or put it on a shampoo bottle. The intended use of this product, coupled with its unfortunate name, naturally invites a whole slew of dirty jokes that are too cheap and easy to bother making. The product line uses kumquat extract as a key ingredient – which was apparently such a distinguishing feature of this hair care line that the need to put “K-U-M” in the name trumped all business and marketing sense.

#15: IKEA’s FARTFULL Work Bench

No one makes furniture quite like IKEA—or as much of it. The home furnishing juggernaut has risen to prominence while committing to a specific naming system...that happens to include the word fartfull for a workbench. You see, IKEA mostly relies on common words from Sweden and neighboring countries to make product names. Rugs tend to be named after Scandinavian towns. Other products borrow plant and animal names. But while “fartfull” might mean “speedy” to those who speak Swedish, it has a far more unsavory implication for non-Swedish speaking shoppers. Based on the name alone, we’re keeping this workbench outside.


#14: 666 Cold Preparation

This is just one of those strange ones. Are the manufacturers of this seemingly run of the mill cold medicine intentionally invoking 666, the number of the beast? If so, there are multiple ways to interpret this. They could be looking to corner the Goth, Satanist or even heavy metal healthcare market. Alternatively, this could be an attempt at marketing this product as the right choice for a hellishly bad cold. Either way, it’s hard to imagine that the name helped with sales, especially within more religiously conscious groups. Apparently it tasted awful too!

#13: Wunder Boner (wonder)

Looking to put together a gift basket of unfortunately named products for a loved one with a penchant for puns? You’ve already got the Pocket Fisherman, so why not add a Wunder Boner! In all fairness, if you’ve ever deboned a fish, you’ll know that it is no simple task, especially if you’re inexperienced or don’t have the right tools. The Wunder Boner seemingly facilitates removing bones from a fish - and based on the commercial, any immature wordplay was intentional. Marketing 101 states that you should “know your target market.” If the product gets the job done and your target demographic is a couple of dudes on a fishing trip, who can blame them for throwing in a cheap laugh?


#12: The “Fischer's Automatische Gussstahlkugelfabrik” Detector III

Are you in need of the perfect tool to monitor and balance machine vibrations? No? Okay, this isn’t exactly a “must-have” consumer good for the average household. However, there’s the shortened version of the name that would definitely turn the heads of the masses. We agree that “Fischer's Automatische Gussstahlkugelfabrik” is a mouthful that warrants abbreviation. But sometimes, the acronym is not the way to go. The word that results when you combine the first letters of this product name has long been on the list of offensive, pejorative words you just don’t say. While the device probably works fine, we’re confident the name could use an alteration or two.

#11: Crea-Mass

This particular brand of creatine is a bodybuilding supplement that promises to help you gain mass. Now, we’re all for telling the people what they’re getting. It’s just good marketing practice! Do you know what else is good practice? Reading a product’s name out loud before you plaster it all over the place. Bodybuilders will go to all sorts of extremes to reach their goals and get those gains. But with Crea-Mass, well, it sounds like you’re getting a lot more than you bargained for. Like… maybe a laxative as well? If you notice someone using this product at the gym, maybe keep your distance when they’re doing squats.

#10: The Jew's Ear Juice

Mmmm, who wants a long warm draught of ear juice? Poured right from the source. The name of this Chinese beverage actually comes from one of its ingredients, a kind of fungus commonly called Jew's Ear. In 2010, Israel's Consul-General in Shanghai Jackie Eldan praised the name, saying that it reflected the Chinese perception of Jews as hard-working and successful. But according to a company spokesperson, it really was just all about the fungus. After the confusion, they decided to change the name to Black Fungus Juice. To be honest, it doesn’t actually sound that much more appealing ...

#9: Wack Off!

This heavy duty insect repellent makes a number of big claims. It promises tropical strength protection and is used by the Armed Forces. It also advertises itself as being “maxi-strength deet,” which, wilderness enthusiasts can clarify, is not a real measurement of Diethyltoluamide, but more akin to answering “a lot!” But with a real concentration of 346g/kg of DEET, this is honestly some seriously potent insect repellent. The only issue? The fact that “WACK OFF!” is written three times bigger than anything else on this tube full of gel. We shudder to think of the poor soul who read that label too quickly late one night.

#8: Mother Fukker's Salted Peanuts

We seriously doubt that the people behind this salty snack were completely unaware of how people would read this product name. But, in their defense, the questionable word is pronounced “Few-ker’s.” There’s not a ton of information available about these peanuts, but every now and then they’ll pop up on Ebay or an online vintage marketplace. What we do know is that the name was apparently problematic enough that the Norwich Packing Company felt the need to include the pronunciation in their trademark. In legal paperwork, the company emphasizes that it’s pronounced FEW-KERS. But despite the company’s tremendous efforts around its product’s name, we probably won’t be bringing these home for mom.

#7: Nintendo DS Touch Dic

Many of the poorly named products on our list today come from small to mid-sized companies. So we’re honestly shocked to see a mistake this uncomfortable from Nintendo. That’s truly shocking. Honestly, even researching this product was challenging. Those are NOT two words you want to be Googling on your work computer. Surprisingly, Nintendo DS Touch Dic is not, in fact, an adult game or even a dating sim. It’s actually just about the tamest thing that the company has ever put out—because it’s a dictionary. The game came out exclusively in South Korea. But pressure and probably a few laughs from Western audiences ensured that the title was changed to the completely safe “Touch Dictionary.”

#6: Golden Circle Sars

In the medical world, SARS stands for “severe acute respiratory syndrome.” However, it’s also the name of a beverage manufactured by the Golden Circle company. We know that the kids love a cool abbreviation, but in this case, more is more. Label a can as “sarsaparilla” and consumers will think you’re old-fashioned. Stamp the letters “SARS” across it—in all caps —and they’ll seriously second-guess your ingredients. Oddly enough, there were some claims that Golden Circle’s poorly named beverage experienced increased sales during the SARS coronavirus outbreak in 2003. A similar sales spike in Corona was reported shortly after Covid-19, another coronavirus, was declared a pandemic in early 2020.

#5: Finger Marie [aka McVitie's Cookies]

First of all, we don’t take too kindly to foods that tell us what to do. Second, when did cookies get so bossy?! While McVitie’s is a British snack food company, this particular name comes from the name of one of their products in Sweden. While Marie is the name for a type of biscuit, it’s probably not the first thought people have in mind when they see this product’s packaging. Finger cookies are great in all shapes, sizes, and flavors. But when you’re naming them, keep first names out of it!

#4: Alien Versus Predator: Child Predator Hands

Wow. Where do we even start with this one? Considering it’s merchandising for an established film franchise that takes itself seriously, we’re pretty sure the name wasn’t meant as a joke. It’s just a really bad sequence of words that should never have been brought together—let alone slapped on a product intended for children. On second thought though, who is the intended demographic here? We’re pretty sure there has yet to be a film in the Predator franchise that would rightly qualify as child-friendly. This product raises many questions, but there’s one thing that we’re absolutely certain about: its name should’ve never gotten the green light. Most listings have—unsurprisingly—since been updated.

#3: Cemen Dip

There are a number of unique bathing options out there. You can dip in hot springs, mud baths and even beer baths. The latter actually has a long history in Eastern Europe and has some health benefits! However, THIS kind of dip sounds … altogether dubious. Oh wait … this is a dip in the food sense? Wow. That’s... actually worse. Spelled with a “C,” cemen (pronounced “tcheh-MEN”) is, in reality, a popular type of dip or spread that hails from Turkey. It can be made from tomato paste, garlic and walnuts—nope, we’re not going there. Honestly, reading the ingredients, it actually sounds pretty good. But it would certainly benefit from a rebrand in English markets.

#2: Ayds

This appetite suppressant wasn’t just a real product—it was a hit! Originally produced by The Carlay Company, its roots date all the way back to the 1930s. It wasn’t until the 1970s and early ‘80s, however, that it really hit its stride and became an industry leader. But that all changed when awareness about “acquired immunodeficiency syndrome” or AIDS increased drastically in the ’80s. It also didn’t help that the primary function of the product - losing weight - was also one of the symptoms of the condition. The company tried to pivot by rebranding its product as “Aydslim” and “Diet Ayds.” But in the early ‘90s, the company gave up and ceased production.

#1: Rexona Girl 24H Intensive Pussy Wind Hello Kitty Anti-Perspirant

Where to begin with this product? Probably with general advice to all aspiring product marketers out there that while “pussycat” is a cute way to refer to a feline, you can’t take the word “cat” away and expect people to still understand. We can chalk up this lengthy name to a series of bad translations that serendipitously came together in one truly awful name. “24H Intensive” wouldn’t be so bad if it weren’t followed by those next two words. We can only assume that “wind” was supposed to mean that it’s an aerosol spray...? But by the time you read “Hello Kitty” and understand that that’s the feline they were referring to… it’s much too late.



Which of these product names had you asking yourself, “How did no one catch that?” Let us know in the comments.