Top 10 Funniest Cat Valentine Moments on Victorious
Hollywood Arts’ resident airhead definitely deserves a list of her own! Welcome to MsMojo, and today we’re counting down our picks for the Top 10 Funniest Cat Valentine Moments in Victorious.
For this list, we’ll be looking at Catarina Valentine’s most laugh-inducing moments from “Victorious” only! Sorry “Sam & Cat”.
#10: Cat Punches Tori in the Face
"Cat's New Boyfriend"
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Violent, is not a word we would use to describe Cat Valentine. Unpredictable, on the other hand, fits her character quite nicely. In the season one episode “Cat’s New Boyfriend”, Cat starts going out with Tori’s ex, Daniel. Tori acts like it’s no big deal, but her emotions eventually get the best of her. She winds up dousing Cat and Danny in melted cheese, and then proceeds to kiss Daniel - with Cat catching them in the act. Tori is quick to apologize, but Cat’s feelings are still hurt. So when Tori quips, “If I were you I’d just punch me right in the face,” Cat takes her advice to heart. In typical Cat fashion, she immediately acts oblivious to her actions.
#9: Cat & Trina's Rap
"Tori the Zombie"
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In the episode “Tori the Zombie", Cat accidentally applies superglue to Tori’s face just hours before she’s set to perform in a play. Furious, Tori demands that Cat and Trina drive to a glue factory to retrieve a remover. On the way, Cat and Trina kill time by rapping the lyrics to “Five Fingaz to the Face”, a song by fictional rapper Dr. Rhapsody – who would later make an appearance in the season three episode "Driving Tori Crazy". While the lyrics are definitely corny, the seriousness with which Cat and Trina take their rapping is what makes the scene so funny. That and the fact that Cat is too shy to rap the line “I'm a pirate and you're my booty”; claiming “it’s dirty”. Oh Cat.
#8: Cat Joins a Prison Gang
"Locked Up!"
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A trip to the fictional nation of Yerba takes a dark turn when Tori accidentally hits the country’s chancellor in the eye with her shoe during a performance. Blinded, the chancellor sentences Tori to four years in prison. When the rest of the “Victorious” gang tries to persuade him to let her go, they too wind up behind bars. Now prison doesn’t exactly feel like an environment where Tori and company would thrive, but somehow Cat manages to bond with a gang of female inmates. We don’t know what’s funnier: Cat’s bubbly declaration that she “joined a prison gang”, or the fact that she promised she’d make them all special t-shirts. It appears Cat’s like a Twinkie, in that she can survive anything.
#7: Riding the Giant Bunny
"The Gorilla Club"
In this season three episode, Tori prepares to audition for an important film role. She practices in front of Sikowitz and Cat, but they tell her she isn’t believable enough. To add a little edge to her performance, Tori decides to visit “The Gorilla Club”, an underground club known for its intense games and contests. One of these is a giant mechanical bunny (modelled after a mechanical bull), that contestants must ride for as long as possible. The fire-breathing bunny is meant to be intimidating, but when Cat Valentine hops on, it’s anything but. As Cat gleefully rides the machine, the owner of the club chastises Andre, screaming, “she’s not supposed to be laughing on the bunny!” Typical Cat, laughing in the face of danger.
#6: Cat's Spending Spree
"Robarazzi"
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In the season one episode “Robarazzi”, Cat becomes obsessed with ordering items from Sky Store, an in-flight catalogue she obtained on a flight to San Francisco. Her first purchase is The Snowbee, a snow making machine that projects toxic fake snow that “can cause abdominal bleeding” if ingested. Cat’s shopping spree only gets worse from that point on, as she enthusiastically purchases a slew of nonsensical items - including a tennis ball cleaner and an alarm necklace. The gang is forced to stage an intervention, ripping up Cat’s Sky Store catalog for good measure. But it’s Cat who gets the last laugh, pulling a spare catalog out of her back pocket and manipulating Sinjin in order to use his credit card. Damn, who knew Cat was so devious?
#5: Cat Interrupts Tori's Audition
"Beck Falls for Tori"
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This episode featured a subplot in which Cat takes a costume design class; using her newfound skills to make a number of hilarious outfits. One of these turns out to be a superhero costume, which she decides to wear to one of Tori’s film auditions. Despite having zero reason to be in the room with Tori, Cat can’t help popping in to check on her friend’s audition. Her attire causes confusion amongst the casting directors, one of which asks Tori why she brought a superhero with her. Cat barges in again shortly after, this time brandishing a coloring book and exclaiming that she colored her tiger purple. Boundaries, Cat!
#4: Containing Cat
"Cell Block"
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You can’t stop a person like Cat, you can only hope to contain her. That’s exactly what Tori and Jade attempt to do when Sikowitz offers the “Victorious” gang A’s if they can make it through a full week without using their cell phones. He later amends the challenge to be boys vs. girls, raising the stakes for all involved. While Tori and Jade are determined to win, Cat’s mental state rapidly deteriorates from a lack of technology, causing the other two to pin her down at one point. They’re later forced to put a leash on her…which Cat then proceeds to chew through like a wild animal. This is arguably one of Ariana Grande’s funniest performances, as watching Cat descend into madness is pure comedic gold.
#3: Cat Removes Jade's Eyebrows & Gets Her Head Shaved in Retaliation
"Crazy Ponnie"
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A quote often attributed to Gandhi is “an eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind”. And yet, when Cat accidentally shaves off Jade’s eyebrows in the season three episode “Crazy Ponnie”, the latter is consumed with thoughts of revenge. It doesn’t get much better than watching an eyebrow-less Jade chase Cat through the halls of Hollywood Arts High School, hell bent on making her suffer for her beauty crimes. Jade is so furious that Andre and Beck have to handcuff her to the table so that she won’t kill Cat during lunch. In the end, Jade gets her revenge by shaving Cat’s head, and the sight of a bald-headed Ariana Grande is something we won’t soon forget!
#2: Cat Gets Addicted to Bibble
"Tori Goes Platinum"
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Bibble is a fictional British food that Cat becomes hopelessly addicted to in the season three episode “Tori Goes Platinum”. And when we see say addicted, we mean it. Her cravings become so intense that her parents hire a man named Oliver to watch over her at all times. Oliver goes so far as to handcuff himself to Cat, whose addiction had gotten so bad that she was pulling around a wagon loaded with a massive sack of the British treat. In the end, Oliver turns out to be just as addicted to the stuff as Cat, and the two wind up stuffing their faces with Bibble behind a dumpster. In the real world, that’s what you’d call rock bottom.
Before we unveil our number one pick, here are some honorable mentions:
Did You Hear What My Giraffe Just Said?
"Prom Wrecker"
Cat's Shellfish Joke
"Wi-Fi in the Sky"
Cat Defends Her Hair Color
"The Birthweek Song"
Cat as Dorothy
"April Fools’ Blank"
Cat Invents Hot-Durgers
"Robbie Sells Rex"
#1: Cat Gets Accidentally Institutionalized
"Rex Dies"
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When Rex becomes badly “injured” in a freak “tornado” accident, Robbie insists that the ventriloquist dummy be taken to a hospital. While there, Jade convinces Cat to talk to the receptionist, who immediately assumes that Cat is mentally unhinged. She soon finds herself locked in a padded room with giant red cubes on her hands to stop her from hurting herself. In classic Cat fashion, she immediately finds a way to entertain herself; bouncing the red cubes off her head and then screaming “I am a Cube Fist Man!” Cat doesn’t help her situation when she later uses her feet to scratch her nose, as this causes the medical staff to think that a specialist is needed to fully assess her. Never change, Cat. Never change.
