Top 10 Cringiest Ads That Actually Aired on TV

After these singing rodents went viral in the Noughties, they were quickly picked up by Quiznos for an incredibly bizarre advertising campaign. Most of their other strange ads have slipped under the radar, but the Spongmonkeys have enjoyed fresh waves of popularity because of how insanely odd they are, especially from a marketing perspective. While at the time it was certainly still weird, but also new and quirky, today it just comes across as a company trying to use an internet meme to look cool . . . which NEVER works. Did anyone rush to buy a Quiznos sub after witnessing this?

Another strange, hybrid creature featured in this Super Bowl ad for Mountain Dew Kickstart. While Mountain Dew has made itself a reputation for churning out weird ads, this one takes the cake. It shows three guys hanging out watching TV, when the Puppy Monkey Baby comes in, carrying a bucket of Mountain Dew and chanting its own name. The guys are much less weirded out than the viewers, abandoning their plans for a quiet night in and following the Puppy Monkey Baby out of the apartment. Perhaps “three awesome things combined” is a few things too many?

This Xbox ad was so controversial it wound up getting banned in the UK. But during its time on air, it sure made an impression. It opens with an already-risky scene of childbirth - childbirth so powerful that the baby is launched out of the window like a missile. That alone is surely enough to invite complaints, but the biggest offense had yet to come. Flying through the skies, screaming, naked, and ageing rapidly, the boy becomes a man and then an old man, before crashing down into a grave. It’s a powerful image, but . . . for the take-away to be that you should play more video games? Yikes.

From the same animator behind Quiznos’ Spongmonkeys, this one also features poorly-photoshopped, singing and dancing animals - but this time they’re cats. A British ad for Crusha, a liquid milkshake mix, it’s been confounding people for years. The choice to feature cats in a milkshake advert doesn’t really make sense, since adult cats are lactose intolerant, and their gravelly, incomprehensible voices don’t make matters much better. Regardless, the ad was inoffensive and memorable, so memorable that they made more than one of these, including one set in a gym.

Get ready to never sleep again. In this 80s ad for Kinder Surprise, a grotesque animatronic version of Humpty Dumpty tries to tell us about the exciting toys available inside Kinder Eggs. But he’s speaking nonsense the whole time. While you can guess at his meaning, it’s an uncomfortable watch because you know how it’s going to end. Predictably, he falls off the wall he’s sitting on, and while he might not be too worried about this, we know that nobody could ever put Humpty together again. Also, isn’t it a little weird that he’s an egg and he’s eating eggs? This is pure nightmare fuel.

Fair warning, this ice cream commercial may put you off ice cream forever. As a person covered in ice cream stares deeply into the camera, an unnerving narration describes how the ice cream makes them feel. Eventually they take out a spoon and start scooping and eating the ice cream from their own head, maintaining eye contact the whole time. As you do . . . Believe it or not, the company were actually going for the creepiness on purpose, and despite how disturbing it all is, their aspirations of going viral were certainly achieved.

Celebrity endorsements are almost always a little bit cringey, but seldom as much as this weird ad for a local bakery chain featuring Major League player Hunter Pence. Back when he still played for the Phillies, he was roped in to sell bread for Liscio’s, though his wooden acting isn’t even the worst part. It’s also notable for showing him using bread in a way nobody has ever used bread, like as a paddle while he rows, as a way to measure his socks, and as weights. Strange that they missed the opportunity to have him use a baguette as a baseball bat, though.

Local commercials are always a treat thanks to their apparent lack of budget and the absence of creative polish. This ad for a gold-buying business in Toronto, Canada is no exception. Russell Oliver himself comes out to advertise his store, desperately begging you to bring him your old jewellery in exchange for plenty of money. It gets worse though, as halfway through he breaks into a song about his business with an array of dancing girls in the background. The dancers are a lot more enthusiastic than Oliver is, even as he waves his wads of cash around, despite the fact that it’s his commercial.

Even for the 70s, this ad is seriously uncomfortable. In fact, it’s a struggle to get through the whole 30 seconds. In this ad for Love’s Cosmetics, a creepy narrator promises women that the sexiest fragrance around . . . is the scent of a baby. All the while, an adult woman stares into the camera licking a lollipop and a lullaby plays in the background. It’s hard to put into words how truly disturbing this commercial is, and it’ll make your skin crawl with every viewing. Hopefully, whoever thought this was a good idea was blacklisted from the advertising industry.

Before we unveil our top pick, here are a few Honorable Mentions:

Tonsils
PlayStation (2000)

Magic Potty Baby
Magic Potty Baby (1992)

Clipart Animation
Health Hotline (2015)

Androids
Duracell (1995)

Eye of the Squirter
Mio (2013)

This Super Bowl commercial is already cringe-material, thanks to the way it reinforces gender stereotypes. But that’s not the only thing that makes it uncomfortable viewing. No, the WEIRDEST thing is that it’s essentially an erotic fantasy featuring Mr. Clean, the brand’s mascot. Rather than cast an actor, they decided to fully animate him the way he appears on the packaging, sending us all right down into the uncanny valley. The wife in the ad just can’t get enough of this CGI monster, but it left viewers feeling seriously confused.