Top 10 Disappointing Movies of 2018
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#10: “The Happytime Murders” (2018)
Based on the uproarious trailer, this buddy cop puppet parody looked like it might be one of the year’s most pleasant surprises, especially with Melissa McCarthy in a starring role and Brian Henson in the director chair. Alas, it opened with lower than expected numbers at the box office with many critics and audiences feeling the film was about fifteen years too late. Between “Avenue Q,” “Team America,” and “Greg the Bunny,” the novelty of seeing puppets being raunchy has worn pretty thin. While not without some inspired moments and impressive effects, “The Happytime Murders” either needed to be a lot smarter or more shocking in a market strangely oversaturated with dirty puppet shows.
#9: “Red Sparrow” (2018)
Although star power isn’t what it used to be, a name like Jennifer Lawrence can still get audiences excited. Since achieving mainstream success in 2011, Lawrence has been the girl on fire in more ways than one. Her presence alone was enough to peak our interest when this spy thriller was announced. While Lawrence’s performance as the domineering Dominika is every bit as captivating as one would expect, the film itself is bogged down by a convoluted plot and several scenes that simply drag on. It’s a shame since “Red Sparrow” is exquisitely crafted from a technical standpoint, but unless you’re willing to accept it as pure style over substance escapism, there’s not much here.
#8: “The Nun” (2018)
Where Universal’s Dark Universe was DOA, the Conjuring Universe has shown great potential over the past five years, introducing various monsters worthy of the spinoff treatment. That being said, this franchise hasn’t been without a few missteps and “The Nun” sadly has more in common with “Annabelle” than “Annabelle: Creation.” Granted, the spinoff was a box office hit, delivering solid performances and gothic production values. As an origin story for Valak, though, it adds little to the universe’s mythology and is unlikely to frighten anyone who’s become desensitized to jump-scares. Considering that 2018 also brought us instant horror classics like “Hereditary” and “A Quiet Place,” “The Nun” can almost instantly be erased from our memories.
#7: “The 15:17 to Paris” (2018)
We can’t overstate just how much we admire director Clint Eastwood, who’s still regularly making movies even in his late 80s. For every “American Sniper,” however, there’s a letdown like “The 15:17 to Paris.” A dramatization of the 2015 Thalys train attack, it’s clear that Eastwood and company went into this project with nothing but the best intentions. Although there’s certainly an interesting story here, there’s not necessarily enough material to fill a 94-minute runtime. What really stopped this film dead in its tracks was the decision to cast the actual people involved as themselves. You’d think this would contribute to the authenticity, but sometimes it’s better to leave the acting to… well, actors.
#6: “Pacific Rim Uprising” (2018)
“Pacific Rim Uprising” is a sequel everyone thought they wanted, but ultimately left most of us wishing the original remained self-contained. To be fair, if you just want to see more Kaiju vs Jaeger action, you’ll get your money’s worth. On a storytelling level, though, the film is full of facepalm-worthy moments. While the newcomers aren’t without charm, most of the characters from the original film are sorely missed. As for the ones who do return, they’re largely underutilized with one of them being unceremoniously killed off. Also, Charlie from “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia” is suddenly the villain? That’s got to be either the dumbest thing in this movie or the most amusing.
#5: “Mute” (2018)
“Moon” was one of those movies that you probably didn’t catch in theaters, but eventually heard about when it arrived on home video. A favorite of critics and cinephiles, this low-budget sci-fi flick put director Duncan Jones on the movie map. As a spiritual successor to his debut feature film, “Mute” seemed destined to become another cult classic. Unfortunately, this Netflix film lacks the tight plot and compelling characters of its predecessor, with the best performance coming from Paul Rudd’s mustache. While “Mute” is undoubtedly a stylish achievement, we’d be lying if we said it didn’t look an awful lot another science fiction film. We think it was called “Blade” something…
#4: “The Predator” (2018)
The original “Predator” is such a kickass movie that we can’t help but get pumped whenever a new installment is announced, even if we know deep down that it’s not gonna be too hot. After the poorly-received “Predator 2” and the divisive “Predators,” this Shane Black film had to be nothing short of mind-blowing. Instead of breathing new life into the franchise, “The Predator” generally left audiences sighing in disappointment. The film isn’t without a few humorous one-liners and the cast share a natural chemistry, but it’s difficult to get invested in anybody when it’s evident from the get-to who’s going to live and who’s going to die during the series of standard action scenes.
#3: “A Wrinkle in Time” (2018)
Disney was fortunately responsible for some of 2018’s biggest hits because they also delivered this box office bomb, which reportedly lost more than $86 million. Even with an A-list cast, gifted newcomers, and a director of Ava DuVernay’s caliber, it’s not surprising that “A Wrinkle in Time” couldn’t live up to expectations. Madeleine L’Engle’s novel has been described as unfilmable and Disney’s previous attempt to adapt it didn’t work either. Still, given its extraordinary visuals, diverse ensemble, and promising source material, this version seemingly had all the makings of a perennial classic. With a script that could’ve used more time in the incubator, however, the film is a wrinkle on Disney’s otherwise smooth track record.
#2: “Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom” (2018)
Unlike our previous entry, the follow-up to “Jurassic World” was a colossal box office smash, although that doesn’t mean audiences got what they paid for. After four movies, you’d think it’d be clear to everyone that dinosaurs and humans shouldn’t co-exist. In “Fallen Kingdom,” however, we not only have to watch characters make the same idiotic choices, but also make new mistakes that defy all logic. Between the volcanic eruption and Jeff Goldblum’s glorified cameo, the best moments are all in the trailer, with much of the action in the second half being restricted to a dimly-lit mansion. If it weren’t for the admittedly intriguing cliffhanger, we’d be ready for this franchise to officially go extinct.
Before we get to our top pick, here are a few dishonorable mentions:
“Gotti” (2018)
“Tomb Raider” (2018)
“The Equalizer 2” (2018)
#1: “The Cloverfield Paradox” (2018)
Like its predecessors, the third “Cloverfield” had one of the most brilliant marketing campaigns in cinematic history with its story and connection to the other films clouded in mystery. Originally announced under the name “God Particle,” we didn’t even know the film’s exact release date or official title for a while. Our jaws dropped when an ad for “The Cloverfield Paradox” appeared during Super Bowl LII, revealing it’d be available to stream right after the game. Assuming that you weren’t staying tuned for “This Is Us,” we all immediately logged into our Netflix accounts, pressed play, and… watched a generic sci-fi movie with no new ideas, engaging characters, or worthwhile plot twists. Well, that sucks…