Top 10 Funniest Dodgeball Moments Everybody Remembers

Watching White Goodman trying to smooth talk someone is like watching a car crash. And in this scene where he tries to ask Kate out on a date, while casually sipping vitamin water, we get White turned up to 11. Not only does he pump up his ego before she arrives, but he goes on to boast about reading the dictionary, claim he wrestled a bull by the horns, misspell his name and ‘jokingly’ offers to shackle Kate up. It’s pretty much all of the White Goodman-isms you can think of, at the same time.

Washing a car while wearing swimwear can help draw in customers, right? Well, yeah we guess, unless you are these guys. In an attempt to make some money - so they can save their gym - the guys of Average Joe’s slip on their slickest summer wear and offer to wash cars . . .only to find that there’s a group of women across the street doing the same thing. Although this moment is terribly embarrassing, the crown jewel is Jason and that guy with his truck. Well, at least he’s paying him, which is something, right?

If only all of the educational videos in school were this much fun. In an attempt to bring the guys up to speed on the rules and history of dodgeball, Patches O'Houlihan shows them this cheesy, retro video - with Hank Azaria brilliantly playing a young version of him. Young Patches talks us through the rules and gives us a bit of advice on who to pick - and who not to pick - for the team. And he tops off his rallying speech by giving us the ultimate winning dodgeball formula in the form of the 5 Ds.

Speaking of picking your team, there’s always that one team who ends up with all the biggest and strongest players - and they’re usually captained by an insecure jackass like White Goodman. Flaunting his new collection of athletes, White gatecrashes the Average Joes drinking at a bar and introduces his team one-by-one, including his deadly secret weapon - who Owen just so happens to have the hots for. After massaging his own ego, White decides to hit Peter with some put downs in the form of mimicking him, which is once again, classic White Goodman. Touché indeed.

Although White talks a good game, he’s mostly all talk. And he reveals in this scene that he’s clearly scared that Average Joe’s can whoop his Purple Cobras. And so, he hatches a plan to bribe Peter - but not before spouting absolute nonsense and giving us some of the most infinitely quotable dialogue in cinema. Including a line that proves he clearly is not dumb. We love the fact that the whole cash-in-a-suitcase reveal completely mocks the Hollywood cliche - and even White is onto how misleading it is. At least he’s not completely clueless.

Let’s just take a moment to appreciate perhaps the most Average Joe of all - Justin Redman. At pretty much every turn, Justin gets a smack in the face - more on that later. And in this flashback scene, Justin recounts how a cheerleading tryout went terribly wrong, leaving him embarrassed in front of a girl he liked. The scrawny Justin gets partnered with someone who is probably twice his size and weight - and with him having to lift her above his head, it was only going to end one way. At least he didn’t completely suffocate.

We learn early on in the film that White Goodman has a bit of a complicated relationship with food. He talks about how he used to be overweight. And we see how he uses electrodes to keep his willpower in check when it comes to eating donuts. Ouch! But this scene is . . . well, we don’t quite know what it is. Sitting in his office watching some sort of cooking program, White is holding a slice of pizza, which he gears up to put down his pants - only for his assistant Me'Shell to walk in on him. Turns out, it’s some sort of ‘private reflection period’. Whatever, man.

This guy just doesn’t know when to quit. Although White fails miserably at wooing Kate early on in the movie, he decides to pay her a visit at her home to give it another shot. Wearing a white leather suit and neck scarf, he fires her, offers her a flower, and seems confused why she won’t date him. And to make matters worse, he leans in for a kiss, only to get his head slammed against a wall, busting his lip. Awkward, right! Well, at least he rides out of there in style. And we’ll always have this classic line.

So, we already mentioned White’s past and how he used to be overweight. Well, after losing the dodgeball tournament - no thanks to Chuck Norris allowing Average Joe’s to compete - things go a little downhill for him. And he gains a little weight. Right before the end credits roll, White can be seen ogling at the TV, bucket of chicken in hand, cursing the name of Norris. And for those who stuck around right to the very end, there’s even a post-credit scene where White shows off some of his dance moves.



Before we unveil our top pick, here are a few honorable mentions.

Beaver Tranquilizer


Lance Shames Peter


Catching Practice


Ouchtown

Some people work better under pressure and appreciate an extra bit of motivation. And what better way to motivate someone to dodge a hurtling rubber ball than to make them, uh, dodge oncoming traffic, and also pelt them with wrenches. Right? Teaching the guys the importance of the 5 Ds of dodgeball, Patches enlightens the group with his pithy wisdom. And Justin is the first one to fall victim to it. We then watch as the guys dance their way through a routine, all while being target practice for Patches. You’ve got to appreciate their commitment… or worry about his sanity. Take your pick.