Top 10 Most Memorable Bridesmaids Quotes

We’re sure many a bridesmaid has considered this edict while in the midst of wedding-party insanity, but Kristen Wiig’s Annie is too far gone to remember at this point. Between the perfect Helen stealing Annie’s idea for a Paris-themed bridal shower, and then one-upping Annie’s sweet and meaningful gift to Lillian with an all-expenses-paid trip to Paris, Annie has had enough. Her public, messy, but not completely unwarranted meltdown turns into a drag-out fight, and Maya Rudolph’s Lillian feels it necessary to remind Annie of this unspoken rule. But there’s nothing “normal” about talking behind someone’s back, especially if it’s someone you truly love.

On the Most Eventful Plane-Ride Ever - the one the bridal party takes from Lillian and Annie’s hometown in Milwaukee to Sin City’s Las Vegas - many things go wrong. Starting with almost everyone getting drunk. But this moment between Ellie Kemper’s Becca and Wendi McLendon-Covey’s Rita is almost sweet. Becca and Rita share some real talk about sex and marriage, heightened by the alcohol in their systems—not to mention Rita subtly encouraging Becca to experiment and “find out what [she] likes.” Rita complains about feeling unseen by her husband, prompting Becca to tell her this truth. We can’t vouch for the scent of pine needles, but Rita’s blonde hair can certainly look like sunshine… at least to a drunk person.

Talk about #RelationshipGoals. Annie’s sometime beau Ted, played with smarmy charm by Jon Hamm, is always going out of his way to make Annie feel … like crap. Even in a situation like this, where he’s trying to be gentle and honest, we can’t help but wonder if he is at all aware of how much his words and actions—hell, everything about him—can harm others. Especially our hero, Annie. We know these two aren’t destined to be together, even at this early scene in the movie, but we can’t wait for her to figure out that she deserves so much better. Sorry Ted, no matter how much you try to hide it, you’re still a jerk.

We love Rhodes. He’s such a better partner for Annie than Ted is, even if it takes her a while to figure that out. When Annie runs into Rhodes in the late-night market after another bad date with Ted, he’s genuinely interested and comforting about Annie’s woes. Chris O’Dowd imbues Rhodes with sweetness, Irish charm, and authenticity when he’s encouraging Annie to share her feelings - and his carrots - with him. Saying he’s allowed to tell other people her secrets afterward may not be the best way to convince her, but at least he’s funny and honest about it. And he truly wants to know how Annie feels, unlike Ted the Jerk.

This is not the first time the expression “ugly crier” came of use, but the movie moment likely increased its prevalence and popularity. Annie’s archenemy, Helen, played with delicious condescension by Rose Byrne, approaches Annie for help finding Lillian, who’s gone missing on the morning of her wedding. As they’re driving around, Helen confesses her sins and begins crying… but doesn’t get the sympathetic response she expects from Annie. Annie’s a bit overjoyed to see Helen finally look less than perfect. Even though Helen denies it, vehemently, insisting she’s still pretty [xref], Annie knows the truth—and intentionally tries to hurt Helen by pointing it out.

One of the more heartfelt quotes on this list, and in the movie, comes from Annie’s new close friend Megan. Melissa McCarthy’s Megan isn’t just hysterically funny; she is there for Annie when Annie most needs a friend. Annie feels that she has nothing left, after having lost her job, been kicked out of her apartment, moved back in with her mom, and exiled from her best friend after their massive fight. She complains to Megan that she doesn’t have any friends, but Megan refuses to accept that, and eventually drops this truth bomb on her—and it’s one we can all relate to. Megan supports Annie during her “all is lost” moment, encouraging her and providing her with the real talk she needs.

The world’s introduction to Rebel Wilson, future star of the “Pitch Perfect” movies among other things, featured this classic bon mot. The Australian actor turns on the funny as Annie’s roommate Brynn, who is certainly not the sharpest tool in the outhouse. This role was written for the comedian after she lost the role of Megan to Melissa McCarthy, and her brother in the film, Matt Lucas, was once Wilson’s real-life roommate. When Annie finds out that Brynn read her diary, Brynn defends herself with this amazingly judgey statement about Annie’s pathetic life. And clearly the fact that it was a very personal “handwritten book” wouldn’t have stopped the nosy Brynn from reading it.

Melissa McCarthy says this line as part of the movie’s incredibly funny introduction to Megan, the rugged but kindhearted sister of Lillian’s fiancé and one of Annie’s new fellow bridesmaids. Everyone who meets Annie at the engagement party is so desperate for her to have a partner that they inadvertently pair her up with the nearest-in-proximity male—even if it’s the most unlikely candidate to be her boyfriend. When Megan makes this mistake about a tall sea-captain looking gentleman - and Annie corrects her, she confides in Annie that she’s glad he’s not taken, because… [quote]. It’s so outrageous and unexpected—just like McCarthy’s entire Oscar-nominated breakout performance.

This is the classic crux of a scene that is the pinnacle of this raunchy comedy—and helped make the movie a gigantic hit. The disgusting, embarrassing, somewhat shocking scene is chock full of hysterical quotes, making it nearly impossible to choose only one. Megan kicks off the literal poop-storm to come by apologizing for her enormous belch and her not knowing [xref] [quote: “which end that came out of”]. But “which end” becomes very clear as she squats on the bathroom sink and yells out this gem. As the lovely, classy bridesmaids succumb to the food poisoning from Annie’s sketchy restaurant pick—while wearing the bridal shop’s beautiful gowns—the scene culminates with poor Lillian actually pooping in the busy street [xref]. All these factors contribute to making this “Number 2” on our list. …Sorry.

Before we unveil our top pick, here are a few honorable mentions.

Bloating
Because Nearly Everything Megan Says Is Quotable

Airplane Nightmare
Because Wiig’s Co-Screenwriter Annie Mumolo Says This Hysterical Line

Maternal Guidance
Because This Sweet Advice from Annie’s Mom Is Totally Relatable

The Mile High Proposition
Because McCarthy Coming on to Her Real-Life Husband Ben Falcone Is a Sight to Behold

Bridal Party Diss
Because Rhodes Tells Funny Truth Bombs Like No One Else

Beside the fact that this infinitely quotable moment is relatable, and useful in many situations, Kristin Wiig’s picture-perfect delivery is classic. This is another hilarious scene that’s so jam-packed with great quotes that it’s a challenge to choose only one. On the plane ride from hell, Annie is completely off her gourd on alcohol and pills, thanks to Helen’s condescending, selfless charity. Annie utters this partially sarcastic, it’s-funny-cause-it’s-true statement as Helen tries to convince Flight Attendant Steve to allow Annie to stay in first class. But Steve insists she return to her seat in coach, and close the curtain on her way out. Poor Annie’s self-pitying declaration in response to Helen’s obvious disdain is funny—yet painfully real.