Top 10 Movies You're Glad You Missed This Summer

Movie revivals of old TV shows rarely work, and this action/comedy dud is no exception. Despite the all-star cast including Alexandra Daddario, Zac Efron, Dwayne Johnson and Dwayne Johnson’s oiled pecs, this big-screen reboot attempts to turn the popular 90s TV show into more of a comedy, planting its tongue firmly in its cheek with in-jokes and knowing winks a-plenty. This could have been a good strategy, but the writing just doesn’t click, and often comes across as too “nudge nudge wink wink” for its own good. Try as the cast might to resuscitate the franchise, this one is dead in the water.

A movie adaptation of Stephen King’s decade-spanning fantasy epic has been something a lot of people have wanted to see hit movie screens, but given what audiences were met with when the film finally came out, maybe this adventure should have stayed on the page. With a rushed story that tries to throw far too much mythology and world-building at audiences, the film is a pacing nightmare even with the stellar cast of Idris Elba and Matthew McConaughey working their hardest to make it watchable. There’s plenty more of Roland Deschain’s adventures waiting to be adapted, but they probably won’t be hitting cinemas anytime soon.

This is the second time that Universal Studios have attempted to kick-start a cinematic universe starring their classic horror monsters, and the second time their efforts have been met with disaster. Not so much a movie as a series of overblown action set-pieces and grueling exposition dumps, this horror-action spectacle doesn’t exactly have us chomping at the bit for more of the “Dark Universe”, Russell Crowe’s amusingly hammy performance notwithstanding. The idea of a shared movie universe based around classic movie monsters still has legs, but maybe it’ll take another try to get the formula right.

There’s a list of things that could make the live-action Transformers movies watchable. Medieval knights is not on that list. Michael Bay’s latest entry in the blockbuster franchise is the biggest, loudest and dumbest, further muddying the already confusing Transformers Movie-verse continuity and stretching the limits of our patience with its confused, addlebrained script. You’d think that the always classy Anthony Hopkins might have been able to save this franchise, but not even Hannibal Lecter himself can make this assault on the senses bearable. There might have been a time when this movie series could transform into something worthwhile, but that time has passed.

Movies intended for kids don’t have to be Shakespeare, but most kids deserve better than this cash-in sequel. While the first film at least had a modicum of charm and wit, this sequel relies on too many tired jokes and worn-out story tropes to be anything other than a distraction for tired parents who just want to keep their kids quiet for a while. And for a supposedly major release, the animation on display is surprisingly shoddy, a far cry from what you’d see from other animated films that released this year. It just goes to show, not even children are safe from lazy sequels.


Before we reveal our top pick, why don’t you check out these honorable mentions.

“Birth of the Dragon”


“All Eyez on Me” (2017)


“The Hitman’s Bodyguard” (2017)

In theory, you can make a good movie out of just about anything, but this lame cash-grab doesn’t do much to support that theory. Movie fans scoffed when it was first announced that a feature film was in the works based entirely on the little icons you put in text messages, and while it would have been fun to see people eat those scoffs, their dismissal turned out to be well-founded. Barely justifying its own existence with lame joke after lame joke, this movie is nothing short of a disaster. But what could we have expected from a movie that cast Captain Picard himself, SIR Patrick Stewart, as a talking lump of poo.