Top 10 Scenes in Cats That Will Make You Cringe

Warning, the following video may cause you to cough up hairballs. Welcome to WatchMojo, and today we’ll be counting down our picks for the Top 10 Cringiest “Cats” Moments.

For this list, we’ll be looking at scenes in the motion picture version of “Cats” that had people hissing at the screen in horror and laughter.

Move over, Dr. Frank-N-Furter! There’s a new overly sexualized musical character in town and his name is Rum Tum Tugger. Seriously, his name is Rum Tum Tugger! They weren’t even trying to be subtle with this guy and his big musical number only piles on the already thick innuendo. The whole song plays out like “Magic Mike XXL” in 3D. Of course, we’re not entirely sure if the “XXL” applies here… if you catch our drift. At least Jason Derulo looks like he’s having a ball, but there’s a reason why the Razzies nominated him and “his CGI-neutered ‘bulge’” for Worst Screen Combo. Whatever the filmmakers were thinking, the character and his song are indeed “curious,” amongst other things.

Virtually everyone’s goal in this movie is to reach the Heaviside Layer. Just as they never explain what Jellicle means, though, the Heaviside Layer is also somewhat ambiguous. Since the Jellicle Choice is given a new life, we guess going to the Heaviside Layer is like being reincarnated. So, when the Jellicles put Grizabella in the hot air… chandelier, they’re basically sending her off to die. That’s… disturbing, even though the uplifting music suggests that we’re supposed to find this inspiring. Sorry, but watching Grizabella float into the clouds, we can’t help but think of the Ättestupa scene in “Midsommar.” Just replace that magic chandelier with a clifftop and this sequence suddenly takes on a much darker meaning.

When Macavity snatches Old Deuteronomy, it’s up to the magical and clever Mr. Mistoffeless to bring her back. The literal cat in the hat has a little trouble performing in front of everybody, however. Take that last sentence as you will. As Mr. Mistoffeless continues to struggle, the surrounding Jellicles try to give him a confidence boost. They do so by repeating the chorus over, and over, and over, and OVER again. While the melody is admittedly catchy, the number itself goes on forever. Some songs get stuck in your head, but this one claws its way in there. As the sequence builds to its climax, Mistoffeless finally uses his wand to make some real magic happen. Again, take that as you will.

Oh, Ian McKellen, what did they do to you? One does not simply go from playing Gandalf to playing a theatre cat named Asparagus, or Gus for short. We’d like to think that McKellen and Patrick Stewart dared each other to accept the silliest roles possible. Where Stewart wound up playing a piece of poo in “The Emoji Movie,” McKellen got stuck drinking from a milk saucer. As ridiculous as McKellen looks here, he does manage to bring a fair deal of class to the role. Sure, he essentially talk-sings through his song, but McKellen’s delivery has a bittersweet, nostalgic sentiment to it nonetheless. Still, how can you not cringe watching a performer of McKellen’s caliber get turned into the feline equivalent of Rex Harrison?

We’ll give the movie this. James Corden as Bustopher Jones is an ideal casting choice and he does deliver one of the film’s more entertaining performances. We get the suspicion, though, that Corden knew he was starring in an inevitable dud. After all, there’s a reason why he reportedly skipped the film’s theatrical run and has continually made fun of it. Bustopher’s song thus carries a very self-aware tone, almost as if Corden was trolling the material and the audience. It’s like watching a comedian purposely bomb on stage. It’s so unfunny that it’s not funny, which in turn makes it hilarious. Was this Corden’s intention? Hard to say, but this scene will leave you uncomfortably laughing in any case.

As Skimbleshanks the Railway Cat taps his way onto the screen, this musical suddenly turns into “West Side Kitty.” While the number is well-produced for the most part, it takes a bizarre turn towards the end as Skimbleshanks ascends upward and spins into oblivion. We get that Macavity made him disappear, but why did Skimbleshanks propel up into the air like one of those Sky Dancer toys? Was that just part of Macavity’s disappearing act or did Skimbleshanks channel Mary Poppins? Whatever the explanation is, this song really went off the rails.

Just when you thought that this movie couldn’t get more disturbing, Old Deuteronomy starts directly talking into the camera. Granted, the characters repeatedly address the audience in the original stage musical, but this movie was deprived of any fourth-wall breaks until now. As a result, this scene simply comes off as random, not to mention highly unsettling and kind of invasive. What makes the scene particularly cringe-worthy is that it just keeps going. Every time it seems like Judi Dench is about to wrap things up, she turns back to the camera with another rambling bit of nonsense. All we want is to leave, but Old Deuteronomy takes the audience prisoner. We don’t know about you, but we’re gonna go adopt a dog after this.

For a good portion of the film, Macavity the Mystery Cat dresses like Dolemite. In the middle of Bombalurina’s sensual number, however, Macavity emerges without his coat or hat. On one hand, a lot of the cats in this movie seemingly parade around in their birthday suits. On the other hand, there’s something very off about Macavity’s design. Where most of the other cats are covered by thick layers of digital fur, Idris Elba looks like he’s wearing a skintight bodysuit made of velvet. While every character here has humanoid features, Macavity appears to be more man than cat. So, when he starts frolicking without any clothes on, we half expect him to shout, “we’re going streaking!” Way to make “Fritz the Cat” look tame.

Let’s say you went into this movie without seeing the infamous trailers that broke the internet. About a minute in, you might’ve been thinking, “Alright, the production design is creative, the melody is nice, this all seems quite promising.” Then those darn CGI cats came onscreen and it dawned on you, “Oh boy, this is gonna be a long 110 minutes.” Matters only grow more awkward as “Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats” gets rolling. Here’s a fun game. Take a shot of milk every time that they say “Jellicle” in this movie. Actually, don’t do that because you’ll suffer a lactose overdose before the redundant opening number is even finished. We get it, you’re all Jellicle cats. Now can you please explain what Jellicle means?

Rebel Wilson is clearly doing whatever she wants here, making “Jennyanydots: The Old Gumbie Cat” a highlight of the film. Even without Wilson falling over and swinging her tail around, this musical number would still be completely bonkers. Why? Well for starters, Jennyanydots keeps little mice with human faces as pets. As if that wasn’t enough nightmare fuel, Jennyanydots also has dancing humanoid cockroaches that she snacks on. Roach genocide arguably isn’t even her worst offense. She proceeds to unzip her fur, exposing a pink ensemble covering more fur underneath. Oh, and this isn’t the last time Jennyanydots unzips in the movie. Does this mean that she skinned multiple cats and turned them into bodysuits? Geez, this movie should’ve been called “Silence of the Cats.”