The 10 WORST Parents On South Park
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VOICE OVER: Ryan Wild
WRITTEN BY: Holly Hoyt
Bad parenting in South Park? Who would have thought... Welcome to WatchMojo, and today we're counting down our picks for the least-qualified “South Park” parents. Our countdown includes Carol & Stuart McCormick, Randy Marsh, Mr. & Mrs. Tweak and more!
Welcome to WatchMojo, and today we’re counting down our picks for the least-qualified “South Park” parents. We get that the adults in this fictional town aren’t particularly bright, but they could really use some insight into how much damage they’re causing their kids. Warning: Expect a few small spoilers ahead. Which “South Park” parent do you think is the worst? Let us know in the comments.
South Park Elementary’s resident comedian, Jimmy Valmer is by and large a very nice kid. And to be fair, his family life seems solid as well – at least from the outside. In most of his parents’ interactions with Jimmy, they’ve come across as largely supportive of him. They even worry for him when he gets himself into various ridiculous situations. But we can’t forget a certain comment made by his father, Ryan, in Season 7. Not only did his parents make fun of disabled kids, but they literally view Jimmy’s existence as a punishment for their past crimes. Ouch.
Scott Malkinson has diabetes. How do we know? Because it’s pretty much his defining characteristic. It’s bad enough that the other kids universally refer to Scott as the diabetic kid. But what about the fact that his father appears to treat him even more harshly? In Season 23’s “Basic Cable,” when we get a glimpse into Scott’s everyday life, it’s revealed that his dad cares much more about his battle against streaming services than Scott’s feelings. At one point, he even mocks Scott in the same way Cartman does! Why are compassionate parents so difficult to come by in this town?
Garrison Jr. isn’t exactly what you’d call an exemplary citizen. Although Garrison’s father has only been featured in Season 3’s “World Wide Recorder Concert,” he definitely leaves a questionable impression, as well. In one of the earlier seasons’ darkest jokes, Garrison Jr. takes a lack of abuse growing up to heart while on a trip home to Arkansas. To resolve this issue, Garrison Senior hires Kenny G. to impersonate him and sneak into the younger Garrison’s bedroom. While it could be argued that Garrison Senior only arranged this encounter to save his relationship with his kid, you can’t deny that this whole situation is “pretty effed up right here.”
You might remember Bridon Gueermo from “Elementary School Musical,” which was “South Park’s” parody of the “High School Musical” phenomenon. Even if you don’t, it’s hard to forget his dad. In a sort of inversion of the Troy Bolton character, Bridon dreams of playing basketball. Unfortunately, his musical-theater-obsessed father pushes him to sing and dance instead. When Bridon attempts to be honest with his dad, Mr. Gueermo just aggressively - and rhythmically - starts slapping. Between ignoring his son’s feelings, forcing his family to perform, and going “slap-happy” on anyone who gets in his way, Mr. Gueermo is hardly “Best Dad Award” material. But maybe he has a chance at winning a Tony.
A classmate and acquaintance of the main boys, Tweek Tweak is virtually always on edge. When isn’t he twitching, screaming, or otherwise freaking out? What makes this all the more disturbing is the fact that his parents are the ones who appear to be behind his constant anxiety. They’re the owners of Tweek Bros. Coffeehouse, and they’re constantly shown letting their young son drink copious amounts of their product, even though it keeps him perpetually anxious. To add insult to injury, they’ve been known to manipulate Tweek on several occasions, often for the benefit of their business… which may or may not be a drug front, too. At least Tweek has Craig to comfort him!
Eric Cartman’s single mother is considerably nicer than other entries on this list. But in this unique case, it’s Liane’s giving and gentle nature that makes her such a lackluster parent. Liane is almost completely blind to her son’s sociopathic behavior, frequently giving him all the treats and toys that he wants. Not only does she allow Cartman to disrespect her, but she’s rarely, if ever, seen stopping him from his various misdeeds. The Season 10 episode “Tsst” has Liane attempting to control her son’s behavior with help from the Dog Whisperer. While this briefly works, she and Cartman unfortunately fall back into the old dynamic by the end.
Kyle and Ike’s parents generally care about their kids, but sometimes they have strange ways of showing it. Let’s look at Sheila’s role as leader of the War on Canada in the 1999 movie. She starts the crusade to take down Terrance and Phillip as a way of protecting America’s youth. However, it soon becomes clear that it’s more a matter of her own pride, and the same can be said for much of her antics in the series. Meanwhile, Gerald shows his true colors in Season 20 when he’s revealed to be an internet troll. His behavior during this time likely leaves his sons with very little respect for their father. We hope the Broflovski boys find a good therapist.
Stan’s dad Randy is the most heavily featured parent on the show. And let’s face it – his stupidity can be pretty entertaining. But as the series has progressed, we’ve watched Randy turn from a caring (if clueless) father to a self-centered and self-indulgent man-child. In fact, a lot of the humor in Randy-centric episodes stems from his terrible parenting decisions, from drinking and driving, to infecting himself with cancer, to moving his family to a marijuana farm. Most of it can be chalked up to Randy’s profound lack of common sense, but we can’t help but wish better for Stan (and to a lesser extent, Shelley).
While Mr. and Mrs. McCormick aren’t usually mean to their three kids, they certainly can’t be considered responsible. The two are frequently seen drinking, using illegal substances, and engaging in violent arguments with each other. As such, Kenny and his siblings are largely neglected and have been taken away by child protective services at least once. Carol and Stuart do appear to love their kids to some extent (for instance, they’ve been to many of Kenny’s funerals), but they seem to love their irresponsible lifestyle more. On the bright side, their awful parenting skills have led Kenny to form a tight bond with his little sister Karen.
Where do we even start with these two? Butters’ mother and father are not only the worst parents on this show, but they’re often counted among the worst parents in animated history. Every time Butters’ father appears, he’s either grounding his son, threatening to ground his son, selling his son to Paris Hilton, or worse. Mrs. Stotch is little better, consistently being cruel to Butters and even trying to drown him in a car at one point. What’s so frustrating about this is their constant mistreatment makes Butters - arguably the sweetest kid in town - think there’s something inherently wrong with him, and he’s shown to still care deeply about his parents’ opinions. Where’s Professor Chaos when you need him?
#10: Ryan & Sarah Valmer
South Park Elementary’s resident comedian, Jimmy Valmer is by and large a very nice kid. And to be fair, his family life seems solid as well – at least from the outside. In most of his parents’ interactions with Jimmy, they’ve come across as largely supportive of him. They even worry for him when he gets himself into various ridiculous situations. But we can’t forget a certain comment made by his father, Ryan, in Season 7. Not only did his parents make fun of disabled kids, but they literally view Jimmy’s existence as a punishment for their past crimes. Ouch.
#9: Clark Malkinson
Scott Malkinson has diabetes. How do we know? Because it’s pretty much his defining characteristic. It’s bad enough that the other kids universally refer to Scott as the diabetic kid. But what about the fact that his father appears to treat him even more harshly? In Season 23’s “Basic Cable,” when we get a glimpse into Scott’s everyday life, it’s revealed that his dad cares much more about his battle against streaming services than Scott’s feelings. At one point, he even mocks Scott in the same way Cartman does! Why are compassionate parents so difficult to come by in this town?
#8: Garrison Senior
Garrison Jr. isn’t exactly what you’d call an exemplary citizen. Although Garrison’s father has only been featured in Season 3’s “World Wide Recorder Concert,” he definitely leaves a questionable impression, as well. In one of the earlier seasons’ darkest jokes, Garrison Jr. takes a lack of abuse growing up to heart while on a trip home to Arkansas. To resolve this issue, Garrison Senior hires Kenny G. to impersonate him and sneak into the younger Garrison’s bedroom. While it could be argued that Garrison Senior only arranged this encounter to save his relationship with his kid, you can’t deny that this whole situation is “pretty effed up right here.”
#7: Mr. Gueermo
You might remember Bridon Gueermo from “Elementary School Musical,” which was “South Park’s” parody of the “High School Musical” phenomenon. Even if you don’t, it’s hard to forget his dad. In a sort of inversion of the Troy Bolton character, Bridon dreams of playing basketball. Unfortunately, his musical-theater-obsessed father pushes him to sing and dance instead. When Bridon attempts to be honest with his dad, Mr. Gueermo just aggressively - and rhythmically - starts slapping. Between ignoring his son’s feelings, forcing his family to perform, and going “slap-happy” on anyone who gets in his way, Mr. Gueermo is hardly “Best Dad Award” material. But maybe he has a chance at winning a Tony.
#6: Mr. & Mrs. Tweak
A classmate and acquaintance of the main boys, Tweek Tweak is virtually always on edge. When isn’t he twitching, screaming, or otherwise freaking out? What makes this all the more disturbing is the fact that his parents are the ones who appear to be behind his constant anxiety. They’re the owners of Tweek Bros. Coffeehouse, and they’re constantly shown letting their young son drink copious amounts of their product, even though it keeps him perpetually anxious. To add insult to injury, they’ve been known to manipulate Tweek on several occasions, often for the benefit of their business… which may or may not be a drug front, too. At least Tweek has Craig to comfort him!
#5: Liane Cartman
Eric Cartman’s single mother is considerably nicer than other entries on this list. But in this unique case, it’s Liane’s giving and gentle nature that makes her such a lackluster parent. Liane is almost completely blind to her son’s sociopathic behavior, frequently giving him all the treats and toys that he wants. Not only does she allow Cartman to disrespect her, but she’s rarely, if ever, seen stopping him from his various misdeeds. The Season 10 episode “Tsst” has Liane attempting to control her son’s behavior with help from the Dog Whisperer. While this briefly works, she and Cartman unfortunately fall back into the old dynamic by the end.
#4: Gerald & Sheila Broflovski
Kyle and Ike’s parents generally care about their kids, but sometimes they have strange ways of showing it. Let’s look at Sheila’s role as leader of the War on Canada in the 1999 movie. She starts the crusade to take down Terrance and Phillip as a way of protecting America’s youth. However, it soon becomes clear that it’s more a matter of her own pride, and the same can be said for much of her antics in the series. Meanwhile, Gerald shows his true colors in Season 20 when he’s revealed to be an internet troll. His behavior during this time likely leaves his sons with very little respect for their father. We hope the Broflovski boys find a good therapist.
#3: Randy Marsh
Stan’s dad Randy is the most heavily featured parent on the show. And let’s face it – his stupidity can be pretty entertaining. But as the series has progressed, we’ve watched Randy turn from a caring (if clueless) father to a self-centered and self-indulgent man-child. In fact, a lot of the humor in Randy-centric episodes stems from his terrible parenting decisions, from drinking and driving, to infecting himself with cancer, to moving his family to a marijuana farm. Most of it can be chalked up to Randy’s profound lack of common sense, but we can’t help but wish better for Stan (and to a lesser extent, Shelley).
#2: Carol & Stuart McCormick
While Mr. and Mrs. McCormick aren’t usually mean to their three kids, they certainly can’t be considered responsible. The two are frequently seen drinking, using illegal substances, and engaging in violent arguments with each other. As such, Kenny and his siblings are largely neglected and have been taken away by child protective services at least once. Carol and Stuart do appear to love their kids to some extent (for instance, they’ve been to many of Kenny’s funerals), but they seem to love their irresponsible lifestyle more. On the bright side, their awful parenting skills have led Kenny to form a tight bond with his little sister Karen.
#1: Stephen & Linda Stotch
Where do we even start with these two? Butters’ mother and father are not only the worst parents on this show, but they’re often counted among the worst parents in animated history. Every time Butters’ father appears, he’s either grounding his son, threatening to ground his son, selling his son to Paris Hilton, or worse. Mrs. Stotch is little better, consistently being cruel to Butters and even trying to drown him in a car at one point. What’s so frustrating about this is their constant mistreatment makes Butters - arguably the sweetest kid in town - think there’s something inherently wrong with him, and he’s shown to still care deeply about his parents’ opinions. Where’s Professor Chaos when you need him?
