Top 20 Dumbest Things Homer Simpson Has Done

“The Homer They Fall”

We know Homer fancies himself a tough guy, but fighting the best boxer in the world? Come on, now. Moe gets Homer into professional boxing, and his escapades attract the attention of heavyweight champ Drederick Tatum. The fight is enormously hyped in the media, but even Moe knows that this showdown is a bad, bad idea. And, well, it goes about as well as he expected. Homer is nearly knocked out by the very first punch, and then he proceeds to stand there in a daze while Tatum turns his face into a punching bag. He doesn’t land a single blow, and he probably would have died if it wasn’t for Moe’s timely intervention.

“G.I. (Annoyed Grunt)”

The army realizes that they messed up recruiting Homer, so they use him as a guinea pig. He and a number of other recruits are targeted by the malicious colonel, who hopes to kill them during a live fire exercise. Falsely believing that it’s Chinese New Year, Homer decides to celebrate with a flare gun. He shoots the bright flare into the dark night sky, accidentally exposing his unit’s location. Luckily, the colonel’s group were all wearing night vision goggles, and the flare disrupts their vision just long enough for Homer and his friends to escape. He can be pretty smart when he’s being stupid.

“Kamp Krustier”

You’d think the safety inspector of a nuclear power plant would have at least read the safety manual. You’d think. When Homer finally goes to work early one episode, he finds time to clean up his desk and even cracks into the Nuclear Reactor Safety Manual - something he should have read when he started the job. But, not only has he not read it - he hasn’t taken it out of the plastic wrapping! The reason for putting it off for so long is even worse. This is the man keeping the entire town safe from nuclear radiation.

“Bart Carny”

Not offering a bribe on the grounds of moral decency is one thing - not offering one because you just don’t get the idea is something else entirely. Homer and Bart take over a rigged ring toss game at a local carnival, and the booth attracts the attention of Chief Wiggum. He threatens to shut the operation down if a bribe is not offered, and he tries everything in his power to get Homer to understand this. At one point he even calls out his own wink and refers to a “Mr. Bribe” while asking for the money. But Homer just doesn’t get it, and Wiggum shutters the game after losing his patience.

“Bart Star”

Homer proves to be a bad football coach, and his behavior causes Bart to quit the team. This infuriates Homer, who decides to teach Bart a lesson about quitting. He calls up Mr. Burns to tell him he’s resigning, but immediately winks into the handset, hoping that Burns catches on and plays along with his act. But, as Marge very patiently points out, Burns has no way to catch onto what Homer is trying to do. To his credit, Homer immediately realizes his mistake. But for some reason, he hangs up in a panic rather than explain the situation to Burns.

“Marge vs. the Monorail”

Written by Conan O’Brien, “Marge vs. the Monorail” is often considered one of the show’s best episodes. It’s packed with iconic lines, brilliant visual gags, and clever references, including a “Batman” spoof where Burns and Smithers escape from town hall. Batman is referenced again when Marge brings engineer Sebastian Cobb to Springfield. She and Cobb manage to patch through to Homer, who is trapped on the runaway monorail, with Marge letting Homer know help is available. Should have probably given him a few more guesses, there. But, it is kind of adorable that he immediately thinks of the superhero.

“Homer and Apu”

In this classic episode from season five, Homer gets Apu fired from the Kwik-E-Mart after the latter sold him bad ham. But, after Apu does all he can to right his wrong, Homer tries to get Apu his job back. They both travel to the Himalayas and meet the ‘benevolent president and CEO’ of the Kwik-E-Mart franchise. Like a genie, the president allows them to ask three questions. Unfortunately, but not surprisingly, Homer quickly wastes all three with some truly inept queries. Her and Apu are swiftly booted from the building and, after all that, Homer still doesn’t believe that he was the head of Kwik-E-Mart.

“Marge vs. the Monorail”

Homer isn’t one to care about other people. And if that means tearing up the roads of Springfield so he can have a grand piano, then so be it! Marge mentions that Main Street is in horrible condition, owing mainly to people driving with winter chains and carrying too much weight in their cars. Well, that seems like a pretty pointed comment. Cut to Homer driving down Main Street with winter chains and a grand piano strapped to the roof. How he got that up there, we have no idea. The chained tires rip terrible divots in the road, and Homer proudly comments on the chunks of pavement shooting from his car. This is why Springfield can’t have nice things.

“A Star Is Burns”

Homer is no stranger to sticking foreign objects inside his body. And sometimes those objects are on fire! Lisa makes some endearing comments about a man on the TV, and Homer walks into the room claiming that his ears are burning. This is a phrase typically used by one when they feel others are talking about them. But in this case, Homer means it literally. His ears are actually burning because he stuck a flaming q-tip in them. This ridiculous statement is met by a puff of smoke emerging from his ear, just to really drive home the utter stupidity. Oh, Marge, we see you, girl.

“Homer Goes to College”

As clever as the writers are, some of the most genius lines can actually be accredited to the talented voice actors. And, sometimes, even those aren’t intentional. The Nuclear Regulatory Commission forces Homer to attend college and study nuclear physics. He is accepted into Springfield University (thanks to Mr. Burns) and, to celebrate, he sets his high school diploma on fire. He then sings a catchy little jingle about being smart - while misspelling the word “smart.” Apparently this was a genuine mistake from voice actor Dan Castellaneta, but it was kept in for being very Homer-esque.

“Bart the Daredevil”

Heralded as one of the best episodes of the early seasons, “Bart the Daredevil” is largely remembered for its iconic ending - which just so happens to be one of Homer’s dumbest moments. Bart decides to jump the Springfield Gorge on a skateboard, having been inspired by daredevil Lance Murdock. To Homer’s credit, he does try dissuading Bart from the reckless stunt. But then, to teach him a lesson, he purposely puts himself in the exact same situation. Fighting stupidity with stupidity: classic Homer. He’s successful in stopping Bart but unsuccessful in preventing his own stunt. The skateboard rolls away, Homer is dragged along with it, and the rest is “Simpsons” history.

“Boy-Scoutz ‘n the Hood”

When Bart joins the Junior Campers, both he and Homer go on a father-son rafting trip and share the structure with Ned and Rod. What should have been a fun day out quickly turns into a living nightmare thanks to Homer’s total ineptitude. First, he folds the map into a hat, which quickly blows away. He then commits a flurry of other asinine acts, like using their water to wash his socks, eating all their rations, riding with the current, and shooting down the rescue plane. To his credit, Homer ends up saving the group by bringing them to an oil rig. But, man, talk about incompetence.

“And Maggie Makes Three”

This episode contains what could be the most touching ending in “Simpsons” history - and also one of Homer’s most dimwitted moments. It’s largely told through a flashback, showing how Marge became pregnant with Maggie. Patty and Selma break the news to Springfield, and it seems like everyone in town starts congratulating Homer. Naturally, he doesn’t get it. Instead, he thinks they’re congratulating him on getting a job at the bowling alley. Even the most obvious of tells, like Marge’s baby shower and Moe directly mentioning the pregnancy, go completely over his head. Funnily enough, it’s only when Maude actually does congratulate him on his new job that Homer finally makes the connection.

“E-I-E-I-(Annoyed Grunt)”

The Simpsons move to Homer’s old farmhouse in order to avoid a Southern colonel who wishes to duel Homer. The patriarch is looking to do some farming but finds that the land is in poor condition. His solution? Call Lenny, get a hold of some plutonium, and stick the dangerous element in the ground. Surprisingly, this works and, by crossbreeding tomato and tobacco seeds, he creates the highly addictive “tomacco.” The fact that he used plutonium to farm is bad enough; the fact that he sold these radioactive fruits is just inexcusable. But, hey, this is Homer we’re talking about.

“Much Apu About Nothing”

Lisa tries teaching her father a lesson about logical fallacies, and frankly, we don’t know why she even bothers. A bear is spotted in Springfield and, to deter future attacks, Mayor Quimby stations a bear patrol in the city. No more bears are spotted, leaving Homer to conclude that the patrol is working. Lisa is quick to point out the fallacy, using a random rock on the ground to illustrate her point. Of course, the argument goes way over Homer’s head, and he takes what Lisa’s saying at face value. Guess who just became the proud owner of this a-here tiger-repelling rock?

“Cape Feare”

Giving Homer a new name was never going to end well. In an episode parodying “Cape Fear,” the Simpsons join witness protection to avoid Sideshow Bob, who has been released from prison. The program’s agents tell Homer that he will now be going by “Homer Thompson,” and they give him a little practice run to try the new name out. He immediately fails to understand, completely ignoring the agent’s calls for “Mr. Thompson.” After what seems like hours, they try something even simpler. All Homer has to do is smile and nod. But, still nothing. Homer’s famous response is one of the greatest one-liners in the show’s history.

“Homer the Smithers”

Only Homer Simpson can find a way to set cereal on fire. He becomes Mr. Burns’s new assistant, and one of his many duties is making Burns his breakfast. He first tries some type of bizarre kebab, but he continuously sets it on fire. Those are certainly his own fault and lack of sense – especially that microwave bit. But, fine, let’s try something simpler. Not simple enough, apparently, but it does make for a fantastic visual gag! We’ll commend him here: coffee and donuts does seem like the right next course of action. Unfortunately, Mr. Burns isn’t too thrilled about it.

“Bart’s Friend Falls in Love”

This episode from season three does a lot of fun things with Homer’s intelligence. Or lack thereof. When Lisa starts fearing for her father’s health, Marge buys him a weight loss tape, but the company instead replaces it with a tape that improves vocabulary. Homer listens to it while he falls asleep and he quickly develops a scholarly lexicon. But he discovers that he isn’t losing weight, so the tapes are thrown in the garbage. His vocabulary quickly returns to normal, and that includes losing the word for “spoon.” It’s just a lucky thing Marge is able to decipher the term “metal dealy.”

“Homer Goes to College”

The Nuclear Regulatory Commission pays a visit to the power plant and places Homer inside of their van, which contains a simulated workstation. The goal of the station is to test the competence of the safety inspectors. Well, we all see where this is going. A man informs Homer that he is not in any real danger, and the van obviously has no nuclear material inside of it. Despite this, Homer randomly presses a number of buttons and somehow causes a meltdown. A large amount of radiation is released, and the van gets so radioactive that it melts into the parking lot. Leave it to Homer to somehow break the very laws of quantum physics.

“Itchy & Scratchy: The Movie”

Homer’s stupidity can be traced to many things. Maybe it was the sixteen crayons he stuck up his nose as a child, or maybe it’s this story. Homer tells it to Bart, explaining that when he was a child, he desperately wanted a catcher’s mitt. Unfortunately, Grampa wouldn’t get it for him, so Homer held his breath in an act of defiance. He held it for so long that he eventually passed out and hit his head on a coffee table, giving himself irreversible brain damage. It explains so much. Then again, he had to be pretty dumb to even do that in the first place so, who knows, maybe he’s just born that way.