Top 50 Worst AS SEEN ON TV Items Ever

A pillow that can hold your tablet - just what you always wanted…right? Maybe this was actually kinda useful before there were all those tablet cases with built-in stands. But even then, the reason for this thing seems odd. In the commercial they show people using it on an exercise bike. Really? We get using it in bed - but at that point can’t we just lean it against one of our own pillows? The one good thing about this product is that it transforms into one of those travel neck pillows. But then you have to go and hold your tablet in your hands!!! Guess you have to buy two.

They may call them a “miracle,” but these are just graduated compression socks. Now, can compression socks be useful? Yes, definitely - so these can be as well. But they aren’t using any kind of new technology that any regular pair of graduated compression socks don’t already use. They also claim to be much more fashionable than medical socks. That’s debatable. Basically they just took a product that already existed and threw a fancy eye-catching name on them. That gives us an idea for an amazing new product. It’s called a Miracle Fork. And if you buy one you get a Miracle T-Shirt at half price.

When socks and slippers just won’t do - Leg and Foot Warmers save the day. Some people have called them an ugly version of UGGs, but to us they are like a snuggie for your feet and lower legs. These fleece boot-like things wrap around your lower leg and feet and do the job of a nice big warm sock, but with the added bonus of making you look ridiculous. Not to mention the opening at the toe (we guess that’s why they aren’t called Leg and Foot and Toe Warmers). They also make the claim that the product helps promote circulation - but we doubt it. And we already have the Miracle Socks for that anyway.

It’s been decades and we still don’t know what secret Victoria is keeping from us. But it took us all of 5 seconds to crack the code of My Secret Hair Enhancer…Spray paint. Okay, not literal spray paint, but a head-safe version of spray paint that is supposed to cover up any bald or balding areas among whatever hair you have left. According to the how-to videos we watched, there are also some fibers you have to shake onto your head as well. Also, don’t plan on letting anyone get too close or touch your head if you want to keep your use of the My Secret Hair Enhancer a secret.

Nope this isn’t some kind of elegant PEZ dispenser but rather a urine dispenser for women who are sick and tired of all that sitting and squatting and want to pee standing up. All they have to do is stick this funnel-like device in their pants, tube pointed out and let ‘er wizz. The product description also hypes the fact that the product allows women to urinate while in the “lying position” as well. What? When is that ever necessary? And regardless what position they use it in, they still have to put this urine-covered device away afterwards. We hope not in their purse.

We understand that pillows get warm and that a cooler pillow is more comfortable—which is why we’ve been known to flip our pillow over at least once throughout the night. But what if you had a cold vinyl-covered mat filled with water to put on top of your pillow instead. Well, you’re in luck. Say hi to Chillow. Now, instead of a comfortable pillow you probably spent quite a bit of money on, you can rest your head on a rather uncomfortable mat. And you get the added bonus of the valve possibly popping and waking up in a pool of water.

Big dishwashing gloves with a hard, rough palm - Tater Mitts look more like some kind of torture device than a kitchen accessory. Which we guess makes sense since they are designed to rip the skin off of a potato in 8 seconds. What they don’t mention in the commercial is that you first have to boil the potatoes for 5 minutes before running them under cold water while rubbing them vigorously between the gloves to “peel” them. Forget to boil them and these things are more than useless. So, really you’re looking at 5-minutes and 8 seconds (at least). We’ll stick with the good ol’ potato peeler thank you very much.

You know when you were a kid in school and you got chalk on your hands from writing on the blackboard and then you touched your head and some of that chalk color got in your hair? Well, someone turned that into a business and called it Hot Huez. Pull your hair through the hair chalk applicator and voila - you have some chalk-colored strands. Except your head isn’t a chalkboard. Also, it washes right out in the shower, so if you like piña coladas, and gettin' caught in the rain - you might want to skip the rain part.

“Can” and “should” are two very different things. You know, just because you CAN make something portable - doesn’t mean you SHOULD make it portable. A phone…Yes. We’re totally on board. But we’re thinking a sauna is something that doesn’t really need the “portable” treatment. Maybe it’s just because you’ll look ridiculous in it - because you will, like some kind of upright silver turtle with your head and hands sticking out. But it will definitely heat you up like a sauna. And hey…there’s also a cup holder. So, that’s pretty cool.

If you make a big bowl of ramen, and your first thought is “man, if only this instant food took a fraction of the time to cook!”, then boy do we have the pointless product for you! Instead of simply placing the freeze-dried noodles into a pot, the Rapid Ramen Cooker promises that their ingenious plastic dish will cut your precious ramen-cooking time in half. Well, you don’t have to be a rocket scientist to realize that the microwave might be your fastest heating option, but how’s this cookware any better than your run of the mill bowl? It, uh… has handles, of course! Next, they’ll try to sell us a spoon and call it the… Speedy Scooping Device.

Nothing about the Neck Massage Air Cushion seems right. From the super uncomfortable look of the woman using the product on the box, to the fact that you are literally putting something around your neck and then purposely making it tighter and tighter. Why do so many of these products sound like they could be used as torture devices if they landed in the wrong hands? Although in the case of the Neck Magic Air Cushion it is in your hands—so you really have no one to blame but yourself.

We’re not trying to take sides in the very contentious “which are better - cats or dogs?” debate. But when it comes to making a pros and cons list, isn’t one of the items on the dog’s pro list the fact that they don’t go to the bathroom in the house? No litter boxes, no constant stink in the air. With the Potty Patch you can turn your outdoor pooper into an inside one with a square of artificial grass. Now, maybe if we could use it to practice our putting…

From dogs pooping on a patch of fake grass to cats using the toilet. Yes, we’re talking about Citikitty - the toilet training kit for your kitty cat. And yes, we get it. A cat that can use the toilet sounds like a dream come true. But is it really? Health officials warn us never to flush our cat’s litter down the toilet - and it isn’t just because of the litter clogging the pipes. It’s because the toxins in cat waste can be harmful to some humans and no one wants that getting into the water supply. There’s also the issue that cats who use the toilet aren’t burying their feces - which is a natural instinct of the animal. Sorry cats - back to the litter boxes.

Unrolling an electronic piano might sound really good, but you know what doesn’t sound really good? A roll up electronic piano. Unrolling an electronic piano might sound easy, but you know what isn’t easy? Properly playing a roll up electronic piano. To be fair - there are a wide range of rollup pianos out there, from really cheap kiddo ones to one supposedly designed for actual musicians. But for a little bit more money you know what you can get? An actual electronic keyboard. Sure you can’t roll it up, but those are the sacrifices we all must make.

There are plenty of toilet lights out there - but what makes Bowl Brite so special is the device’s detection system that can tell whether the toilet seat is up or down and indicate this via glowing red or green when you walk into the bathroom. If this product were ever to catch on, it would derail the careers of many aspiring stand-up comics whose whole routine is centered around a 10-minute bit about how men always leave the toilet seat up. What someone really needs to invent is a device that senses when you are about to purchase a ridiculous product like this and turns on a red light telling you to stop.

Head Wedgie? Really? They couldn’t think of anything better to call it? This is basically a larger neck pillow that, instead of fitting around your neck, fits over the head rest of your seat, allowing you to rest your head without flipping from side to side. If we’re being honest, this one actually looks kinda useful. It’s a little bulky, so you aren’t bringing it on a plane - but for the car, or maybe even a chair at home, we can see it coming in kinda handy. But again… Head Wedgie! We’re not sure we can get past that.

We were always told that sticking Q-Tips in our ears could be very dangerous, but no one ever told us not to stick a vacuum in there. Still, does that mean it’s safe to do it - or just that no one ever figured people would even consider sucking wax out of their ears with a vacuum device? Well, if it was the latter, then they were dead wrong. Say hello to the WaxVac ear cleaner. Well, you can say hello to it. We don’t care if they advertise it as using “Gentle Suction” - we are only saying good-bye to this crazy thing.

The Fanny Bank is a piggy bank in the shape of a bum sticking out of a pair of pants with the crack for the coins in, where else, the crack of the plastic butt. Insert a coin and hear the fanny fart. This one is pretty simple: The point at which this product goes from awesome As-Seen-On-TV item to awful As-Seen-On-TV item is the point at which you no longer find farts to be hilarious. Because the hilarity of the fart sound is what this product relies on 100%.

What are you to do when people at work are always stealing your lunch? Well, you could talk to them like adults and politely ask that whoever is doing it please stop. Or you can put your lunch in the fridge locked in a silly plastic cage. But wait. Couldn’t they just take the whole cage? Well, yes they could - but according to the commercial, doing so would be fruitless because even an 800 pound grizzly bear can’t break the fridge locker. We guess you better not forget the combination then.

Pajamas are super comfortable, but you can’t wear them in public. Jeans look good in public, but they aren’t that comfy. Allow us to introduce you to the Reese’s of clothing… Pajama Jeans. Just like the aforementioned candy brings together chocolate and peanut butter, Pajama Jeans bring you all the comfort of pajama bottoms with the stylish look of jeans (or at least that’s what the infomercial tells us). And for more weird wearables - get a load of the wearable towel. Because why just dry yourself off when you can wear your towel like some kind of terry cloth toga?

You know how annoying it is to open your butter dish, take some butter with a knife, and spread it on your toast? Ya, neither do we. And yet, that’s basically the problem EZ Butter decided to solve with this handheld dispenser. However, it’s not like the thing also spreads the butter for you. It just drops a pat of butter on your food and then you still have to do the rest. How much EZer is that really? The fact that the product no longer exists seems to imply that it was EZ for people not to buy it.

With a name like “Doc Bottoms” and “Aspray” - pronounced A-spray, but easily misread as “asspray” - you’d think this product would be ripe for a parody. And it would be if the product wasn’t actually deodorant for your butt. But it isn’t just for your butt, it’s also for your armpits, feet, and - we’re not kidding - your privates. Anywhere that can get stinky - just spray the Aspray and, as they say, it “Literally Stops Odors before they Start.” Given what they’re selling, we appreciate that the infomercial doesn’t take itself too seriously. But we can’t take the product seriously either.

Wanna listen to One Direction or Justin Bieber while you brush your teeth? Just take out your phone, go to your Spotify account, and play the song. What you don’t need to do is buy a Brush Buddies Singing Toothbrush. However, if it really does make your tooth-brushing experience as amazing as it does for the girl in the infomercial, then we take it all back. While we’re on this dental care kick - if squeezing toothpaste onto your toothbrush is as harrowing an experience as it is in the Press2Paste infomercial, we guess the product would have value. Otherwise, allow us to ask…. Why?

The name of this one is a little misleading. This isn’t talking toilet paper - because that would be dumb right? No, this is the toilet paper roll that talks. Yes, it’s a real thing. Just record a message on the roll and whenever the toilet paper gets pulled the message will play. Prank your friend or - as the example on the packaging suggests - ask your girlfriend to marry you. We’re not here to hand out relationship advice but… Don’t ask your girlfriend to marry you via a talking toilet paper roll! The best thing the roll could say would be to admonish you for having bought the stupid thing in the first place.

We all know how labor-intensive and time-consuming curling your hair is. Well, not anymore - if the AIR Curler is to be believed. Just stick the big bucket thing to the end of your hair dryer, put a chunk of hair in said bucket, and let ‘er rip. According to the product description, what you should end up with are, “soft, tangle-free, long-lasting curls.” However, that doesn’t always seem to be the case in real life. What many women get is kinda wavy hair or maybe scraggly curls - and be careful, it gets really hot.

As Timon said in “The Lion King,” “what’s in a name?” Well, in this case… everything. There’s nothing wrong with the product itself. It's a cookbook filled with easy and nutritious recipes you can make in under 15 minutes - who doesn’t like that? But oh that name. Yes, we get it. They call them “Dump Dinners” because you “just dump in all the ingredients and bake.” But come on! They couldn’t come up with a name for the recipes that didn’t also bring to mind where the meals would end up after passing through our intestinal tract? Do they not own a thesaurus? There’s gotta be at least one or two better words. And speaking of number two…. Sorry, we couldn’t help it.

While it sounds like an NSYNC parody song, Booty Pop is actually underwear with padding. Say bye, bye, bye to your flat rear, and say hello to your brag-worthy bubble butt in seconds with these transformational panties. It looks like we found out where all the shoulder pads went when they went out of style in jackets at the end of the 80s. The problem is that, while it does seem to work with certain outfits and certain types of clothing - other times you can see the outline of the padding through the clothes. And, at least according to a few real women who’ve tried it, it isn’t very comfortable either.

We’re all familiar with how Mafia men use rubber bands from broccoli bunches to hold their money instead of wallets, right? Well, how would you like to pay for a manufactured version of those bands to hold your money - instead of getting one for free off of an actual wad of broccoli? Ya, we wouldn’t either. But that didn’t stop Johnny Gennaro from creating The Broccoli Wad money band and pitching it on “Shark Tank” back in season two. While he did make a deal on the show, it never actually materialized - and within a year or so the Broccoli Wad was swimming with the fishes.

As-seen-on-TV items seem to spend a lot of time focused on people's rear ends - from making them look better to helping them smell better. But with the Tush Turner now your butt can… turn better? Ya, like you know how awful it is getting in and out of a car? Well, stop turning your body to get in and out all by yourself, and start letting the seat cushion help out a little. The Tush Turner is a seat cushion that rotates to supposedly make it easier and less strenuous on your body to enter and exit a vehicle. Honestly, we'd like to tell the people who invented this ridiculous thing to do a different kind of sitting and rotating.

Though dog waste might seem like little more than an inconvenience, it can contain bacteria and parasites, which if exposed to the eyes, can result in blindness. Meaning that when you don’t pick up after your dog, you expose others to more than just some poop on their shoes. PooTrap is a product with good intentions, but an incredibly bizarre execution: it’s a brightly-colored harness you strap onto your dog’s rear with a tiny bag attached, so that when they squat to do their business the poo will – in theory - go straight into the bag without you having to actually pick it up, nice and simple! But unfortunately… it’s simply too odd for most people (and probably dogs as well).

If the talking toilet paper wasn’t enough ridiculousness for your bathroom, you can now buy your own very miniature golf set to put on the floor in front of you. This is advertised as being a way to help you practice your putting and uses the same fake green as real golf courses do - though on a real golf course you probably won’t be trying to use the bathroom at the same time! Unfortunately, the Potty Putter raises more problems than it solves, mainly the question of whether you set it up permanently or do you only take it out whenever you need to go.

In what is perhaps the most insulting item on this list, the instant arm lift is used to get rid of unwanted flab by literally taping the flab to the back of your arm! It’s advertised to make “sagging arms appear tight and firm,” and we couldn't think of a more degrading and useless product. The tape is also extremely hard to apply and is quite painful to take off, like slowly peeling off a Band-Aid. Agonizing, undignified, and hopelessly impractical, this item ticks all the boxes of a dumb product.

In case you wanted an alternative to our earlier My Secret Hair Enhancer product, there’s this option. That’s Great Looking Hair Formula #9, and it’s hair in a can. Ron Popeil is the king of infomercials: if you were homesick in the ‘90s, you can bet your ass you were begging your parents for a food dehydrator or a pasta maker the minute they walked in the door. But the most ridiculous Ronco product was GLH-9. Think the before-and-afters would be as effective in HD?

Eating healthy is something we all want to do. But unhealthy food just tastes so good! Well, the Fat Magnet claims to be the perfect solution. You hover it over your food, and the excess fat on greasy foods gets sucked up by magnets, or something like that. Truth is, we don’t really know how it works, mainly because it doesn’t. Seeing this product endorsed on “The Dr. Oz Show” is just painfully awkward, and it should be apparent to anyone watching that it is nothing but a cash grab. Maybe just buy a salad instead.

If you’re stuck in an office all day, finding the time to work out can be a struggle. The Hawaii Chair, also known as the Hula Chair, is intended to kill two birds with one stone. With the appearance of a regular desk chair, this invention possesses a rotating seat that mimics a hula dance. Users can exercise their whole body without even standing up… at least that’s what the infomercial implies. As far as fitness equipment goes, the Hawaii Chair is hardly a substitute for the treadmill or elliptical. On top of that, it’s too rambunctious to function in a quiet workplace environment. Imagine answering the phone or using the computer while riding a tilt-a-whirl. It’s bound to end badly.

This device looks more like it belongs in a dental clinic than as part of your daily beauty/fitness regime. Advertised as a product that gives you a “natural face lift,” the Facial Flex is almost as odd as the reactions of the woman trying it out in the infomercial. And yet, there are reportedly many people who swear by the Facial Flex’s positive results. A similar device is the Neckline Slimmer, a very unusual gadget promising to tighten your jawline, eliminate your double chin, and take years off your appearance by having you repeatedly push your head against it. They say that beauty is pain, but this stuff looks like downright torture.

Younger-looking skin is only one terrifying mask-wear away! Just get into your silk pajamas, sit in your favorite fireside chair and enjoy facial toning sessions that send “impulses” from a nine-volt battery directly into your 12 facial zones! And whatever you do, don’t forget your lube. Does this sound to anyone else like shock therapy? Side effects may include redness, burning, memory loss and violent horror film-inspired nightmares.

No, this is not a support to house your marijuana. It's even worse. The product is basically a piece of foam or plastic that goes in between a woman’s breasts as she sleeps to support them during the night. It's impossible to look at this thing in action and not laugh in embarrassment at the sight of it. If that wasn't bad enough, a vast number of consumers complain that it doesn't stay in place due to the poor, slippery quality of the material. Sorry C-cuppers, but you'll have to find relief elsewhere.

If your goal is to look absolutely foolish while you're out in public, then Zoomies are for you! Zoomies are hands-free binoculars that sit on your head like a pair of glasses, so you can look at faraway objects without the annoying hassle of actually holding a pair of binoculars. Not only do you look ridiculous wearing them, but reviews also cite poor, blurry vision and weak magnification as deal breakers. We can imagine that even avid bird watchers passed on these, and we advise you to do the same.

This ad gets off to a seriously rocky start when a boss looks down his employee’s top, but having the narrator make it the woman’s fault is worse. But for a moment, let’s just pretend this was being marketed as your run-of-the-mill garment to be worn under plunging necklines. There are already so many comfortable, reasonable options out there! This ad is quick to diss the most popular one, a camisole, by dismissing it as uncomfortable. Okay… but then you can still go with a bandeau, or you know, a well-fitting camisole. Other options seem more comfortable, and are undeniably more aesthetically pleasing than the cami secret.

The fact that this is even on the market speaks volumes about our culture. We’re not going to sugarcoat this: the Better Marriage Blanket is a comforter that absorbs your spouse’s fart so that it doesn't stink up the bed. It's even advertised that the blanket uses the same fabric “used by the military to protect against chemical weapons.” Last we checked, humans farted methane, not VX. This probably started as a joke, but then some executive thought there was money in it, so here we are.

You’re on a golf course, having the greatest game of your life, when all of a sudden nature calls. Fear not, the UroClub will resolve your potty emergency! The ads for the UroClub promise a “discrete, sanitary way for your urgent relief.” However, there’s nothing discrete about peeing into a golf club with a receptacle built into the grip. Covering yourself with a towel isn’t going to fool anybody either. It’s also worth pointing out that public urination is illegal in most places. You’re better off seeking out the nearest toilet, especially if it comes equipped with a Potty Putter Seriously, why do inventors keep associating golf with the bathroom?

SlobStopper…. you feel dirty just saying it, which is ironic considering it’s essentially a baby-style bib for adults. The level of incompetence displayed by the characters in this ad is, quite frankly, astounding. So dudes, are you worried that a pretty lady won’t date you after you’ve spilled a coffee on your shirt? Well... if she ever finds out you wear a slobstopper, let us tell you this: it won't be stains that are keeping you single.

The Back-Up is a gun rack that is meant to house a gun beside your bed in order to shoot intruders without you even having to leave the comfort of the mattress. Not only is this one of the most puzzling and useless products ever, but it also holds the potential to be extremely dangerous. God help the spouse who sneaks back into the room from getting a drink. Terrible in all the wrong ways, The Back-Up is truly one of the most perplexing things we've ever seen.

Though “As Seen on TV” items tend to be bad across the board, the worst of the lot was bound to be found in the bathroom. At least there’s no play on words - the “Long Reach Comfort Wipe” lets you know what it’s all about right from the get-go. It creates a degree of separation between your hands and the toilet paper when it comes time to wipe. While there’s no denying the fact that it could serve as a great tool for those with reduced mobility, the fact that this product markets itself as the next toilet paper innovation, poised to make traditional wiping a thing of the past, undermines any and all credibility.

Honestly… there’s little fun to be had here. A motion-activated fake bird, Polly chirps, turns its head back and forth in a jarring, unnatural movement, and even moves its tail feathers ever so slightly. If this were being marketed as a toy for kids, it would just be an unremarkable, slightly boring product. But look at this commercial. It’s being advertised as a companion - as a legitimate stand-in for a real pet! Sure, caring for a real animal can be a lot of work – especially for the very young or the very old – but seeing an entire family fawn over this plastic bird is downright unnerving.

For any sci-fi writers who predicted a dystopian future in which tv replaces social interaction, TV Hat was exactly the nightmare they were worried about. It’s a visor with a very long cap that you can put your phone inside, creating a portable movie theater perfect for blocking out the rest of the world. It even includes a custom lens to make the display bigger, and is shown as an alternative to the expensive VR gaming systems currently on the market. While watching things on your phone hands-free is a nice idea, anyone who actually wears a TV Hat will never live this down...

Women are always trying to avoid the dreaded Oprah arms, and the Shake Weight is the revolutionary product that exercises your biceps and triceps, while making you look like a complete jackass! And, it’s not just for ladies. Obviously. In just six minutes a day, this little guy will work its magic.

One of the most perplexing weight loss devices ever, sauna pants promise to help you “sweat in the areas you need it most.” These are bulky, uncomfortable pants that heat up the lower half of your body in the hopes of making you sweat. They also need to be plugged in, meaning that you must be sitting within five feet of an outlet. So probably on the floor. Another criticism is that they come in one size, so many report an uncomfortable fit, despite the fact that they’re adjustable. Needless to say, Sauna Pants are one of the dumbest products ever.




What’s the worst infomercial product you’ve ever bought? Let us know in the comments.


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