Another Top 10 Games That Trolled the Cheaters & Pirates!

“Puggsy” (1993)

Ah yes, you guys remember “Puggsy?” That’s OK, we don’t either. While this seemed to be yet another platformer cashing in on the Mario craze of the time, what it is perhaps best known for is its snarky anti-piracy message straight from the developers themselves. “Puggsy” used SRAM as an anti-piracy measure; because the game employed passwords, internal SRAM was not present in genuine cartridges of the game. However, the game does a quick SRAM check after completion of the fifth level, and if detected, the game will lock down, presenting a note from the developers in which they tell you to stop playing a “silly” copy and to go buy the real version of the game.

“Garry’s Mod” (2004)

Like a great fisherman, “Garry’s Mod” set the bait, cast it out, and waited patiently for the juicy reward. And it worked flawlessly. In order to catch pirates, an intentional error was placed into the game, which would read, “Unable to shade polygon normals.” Naturally, players who received this error message went to the forums in order to seek out a solution. The only problem is that this message would only be seen in illegal copies of the game, meaning anyone who asked about the error online was automatically outed as a pirate, and their accompanying SteamID could result in a permanent ban. This error message resulted in 2,500 pirates being identified in just 15 hours.

“Spyro: Year of the Dragon” (2000)

Once upon a time, the “Spyro” games were notorious for being easily cracked. Upon release of this title, the developers put their foot down and filled the game with pirate booby traps. At the beginning, Zoe clearly explains that they are playing an illegal copy of the gam , and as such, they should expect consequences. If they decided to ignore her warning, consequences they received, ranging from altering the game’s language settings to removing necessary items for story progression. But perhaps the most devilish method they employed was sending players back to the beginning of the game and erasing their save file if they managed to reach the final boss. You can’t say they weren’t warned.

“Cross Days” (2010)

Not for one second would you consider sharing your…um…personal habits on social media for all to see. Unfortunately for those that stole the erotic manga game “Cross Days” in Japan, that’s exactly what happened. Pirates would download what looked like the game installer from file sharing websites, but it was actually vicious malware which would steal personal information from the pirate’s computer. After taking a brief survey once installed, the victim’s personal information and a screenshot of their desktop would be uploaded on a website so everyone could see their erotic fetishes. It’s a little line-crossing, sure, but it would certainly teach a lesson.

“Michael Jackson: The Experience” (DS version) (2010)

Who doesn’t love a good Michael Jackson tune? Nobody, that’s who! Who enjoys the sound of thousands of vuvuzelas playing at once? Nobody, that’s who! For those who pirated the Nintendo DS version of this game, they were treated to a full blown assault on their ears. Stolen copies would literally be unplayable, as necessary button prompts were removed, eliminating the entire concept of the gameplay, and the game’s licensed music was replaced with the screeching noise of vuvuzelas. This made it sound like you were in the middle of an obnoxious soccer match surrounded by thousands of drunk fans instead of listening to the funky tunes of Michael Jackson. A he-he!

“Marvel vs. Capcom 3: Fate of Two Worlds” (2011)

Fighting games and rage quitting are like the yinyang of gaming – you couldn’t think of a more harmonious connection. As this game keeps track of win-loss records, many furious fighters were disconnecting from their internet once a loss was imminent. Fortunately for those of us who DON’T disconnect upon the slightest hint of losing, the developers thought of a brilliant solution. Once a clear pattern began to emerge of a certain player quitting, thegame would segregate them from everyone else and put them in a special server with fellow quitters. This would ensure not only that you stop ruining everyone else’s experience, but that you would never finish a match again.

“Command & Conquer: Red Alert 2” (2000)

Anyone who has ever played the masterpiece that is “Red Alert 2” knows that there are two things essential to the gameplay: units and bases. It’s kind of hard to play without them, which is exactly what happens if you steal the game. After spending valuable and somewhat lengthy amounts of time setting up, all of your units and bases will explode into a fiery mess within thirty seconds of starting the game, leaving you with nothing but a flaming crater where once your hopes and dreams of the game stood. This not only creatively wasted the pirate’s time and energy, but provided them with a brief period of excitement before literally blowing it up in their faces.

“Alan Wake” (2010)

Well, we certainly can’t think of anything more fitting for the mateys! Upon illegally obtaining and booting up the game, pirates literally became pirates, as the character of Alan Wake would don a permanent eye patch
throughout the duration of the story, forcing pirates to acknowledge their own thievery while playing the game. As if the constant reminder wasn’t enough, the game would also politely ask you to buy a real copy during the loading screens. While it’s not as harmful or game-ending as the others on this list, it’s certainly hilarious and referential, so much so that Remedy would continue the tradition in their next game, “Quantum Break.”

“The Witcher 2: Assassins of Kings” (2011)

While CD Projekt RED seems to be gaming’s Gods nowadays due to their quality titles and anti-DRM stance, even they aren’t ones to let piracy of their games slide. While their lawsuit-threatening letters to pirates upset many, no one saw issue with their hilarious trolling that was turning the beautiful women of the game into old and wrinkled grandmas. Rather than making love to the gorgeous ladies as he should be, Geralt instead finds himself in thesame situation as Jack Torrance from “The Shining” – making out with a leathery and weathered old lady instead. While not as harmful as a good old fashioned lawsuit, this trick was certainly more memorable.

Before we get in trouble from our top pick, here are a few honorable mentions.

The Wrong Code Lands You in Jail
“Zak McKracken and the Alien Mindbenders” (1988)

The FADE System
“ARMA 2” (2009)

“Banjo-Kazooie” (1998)

Lesson one of “Banjo-Kazooie.” Do NOT piss off Grunty! If you do, terrible, terrible things will happen to you. Players who decided to cheat during the Sandcastle level found this out the hard way. If too many illegal cheats are entered during this section, like opening note doors or moving obstacles, then you will get a fair but stern warning in which you are told that your game’s save file will be erased if you enter another cheat. If you ignore this warning, the game actually goes through with its threat and your entire save file will be gone when you next boot up the game. The real lesson here? Just don’t cheat. Or piss off Grunty.