Top 10 Anime Characters That NEED To Get Laid (Ft. Todd Haberkorn!)

“Mr. Osomatsu” (2015)
Given their wide range of personalities, you would have thought at least one of these sextuplets who have a chance to score. You’d be dead wrong. Heck, the only one that came close was Jyushimatsu, but that was quashed before it began. Osomatsu and his brothers are above all else immature. They’re funny as all hell, but filthy NEETs none the less, to the point where they’re incapable of living without each other. Perhaps all they need to kickstart their path to adulthood is finding that special someone. Here’s hoping that said someone has five sisters…

“Code Geass” (2006-08)
There are crushes, and then there are creepy obsessions. After falling hopelessly in love with Princess Euphemia, Nina takes her feelings well beyond that of gentle blushes. This is on full display when we see her rubbing up against a table while looking at the princess’ portrait in a newspaper clipping. Then there’s also that one time she had a total mental breakdown after Euphemia was killed, leading her to go on a little bit of a rampage. Yeah…girl is a totally cuckoo. Ah well, at least she will always have Table-kun.

“Watamote” (2013)
Oh Tomoko…as much as we’re all pining for you to find that dream boyfriend, you really don’t do yourself any favours. A shut-in who spends most of her time indulging in erotic video games, Tomoko enters high school convinced she’s going to be popular. Alas, she finds herself constantly thrown from one cringe-worthy situation to the next. It’s a shame really, since for all her eccentric qualities and perverted thoughts she’s a real sweetheart who deserves to find Mr Right. Just keep being yourself Tomoko and we’ll sure he’ll come along…eventually.

“My Hero Academia” (2016-)
There’s one in every class. While the rest of the students at U.A High have their own reasons for wanting to become a hero, Mineta’s is rather…shallow. Yeah, the guy is a total pervert who wants to become a hero so he can get his purple freak on with the ladies. As annoying as he might seem, over the series we’ve come to “appreciate” his particular charm, though if there ever was a caped crusader in need of getting his world rocked – it’s Mineta.

“Shimoneta” (2015)
Okay, this gal needs to get some purely for public health and safety! While she seems like the very picture of a proper lady, so many years of repression have turned her into a ticking time-bomb, to the point where her thirst has caused people harm. And we aren’t just talking about that time she nearly drowned Tanukichi in her “love nectar”. We can only hope some brave souls has what it takes to satiate her... Granted it will probably be a rather obscene experience that would put most hentai to shame, but hey, for the sake of humanity it has to be done! Godspeed.

“High School DxD” (2012-)
For a guy who died while trying to score, you would have thought that he’d celebrate his new life as a devil by indulging in as a much sin as possible. Especially since that he has the likes of Rias Gremory throwing her assets at him twenty-four hours a day! Given that Issei is way thirstier than your average anime protagonist, the fact he cops out at every single opportunity gets kind of annoying after a while. Come on man, it’s not like you aren’t spoiled for choice in the romp department either!

“Pokemon” (1997-)
It’s honestly quite fascinating, after all these years, Brock still hasn’t managed to hook up with anyone! Is that even possible? It’s certainly not for lack of trying. After all, there’s a Nurse Joy and an Officer Jenny in every town of every region on the planet, you would have thought that at least one of them would have wanted to ride his Onyx. That’s not even including the countless filler girls that came and went in every episode. Seriously, he's lost out on more girls than Ash has on championship matches

“Rosario + Vampire” (2008)
To be fair, if you found out your fellow students were actually monsters just dying to sink their claws into human flesh, your libido would be at an all-time low as well. Or at least they would if you weren’t constantly surrounded by a harem of devoted, busty monster girls like Tsukune is. His posse consists of an adorable vampire with a second tsundere personality, a voluptuous succubus and a snow woman whose sole goal in life is to bump hips. How do you walk away from that without hitting a home run? Man, wonder which voice actor got tasked with making Tsukune’s serious lack of game believable.

“Naruto Shippuden” (2007-)
To think, a whole war could have been prevented if this guy had got more action. Think about it, if Obito and Rin grew up together and did some horizontal two-person taijutsu, the whole course of ninja history would have been changed. He wouldn’t have gone on a massive vendetta, Naruto wouldn’t have had the Nine Tailed Fox sealed inside him, no Akatsuki, no needless slaughter, the list goes on. Wow…who knew so much pain could have been prevented if only Obito had gotten lucky.

“Yu-Gi-Oh!” (2000-04)
A millionaire who puts all his time into playing a children’s card game and turning everything into a Blue Eyes White Dragon. If there ever was an anime character in serious need of a booty call, it’s Kaiba. You would think between the stress of running a large company, constantly losing to Yugi in a duel and even having his soul sucked out would prompt this guy to find himself a bedroom buddy. You shouldn’t worry too much Kaiba, we’re sure there are legions of women out there who would be happy to tailor to your tastes and dress up as a Blue Eyes.