Top 10 Terrible Movie Dialogues
The world is full of stupid conversations, but some of these take the cake. Hollywood screenwriters can't always be trusted to produce sterling, standout lines of dialogue; and we've chosen these as the worst of the worst. In this video, http://www.WatchMojo.com counts down our picks for the top 10 terrible movie dialogues. For this list, we're taking a look at dialogue between two or more characters that has displayed some of the worst writing and horrible delivery ever captured on film.
Special thanks to our users offbeat08, Andrew A. Dennison and Josh Hammerman for submitting the idea on our Suggestions Page at WatchMojo.comsuggest
#10: The Observation
“Plan 9 From Outer Space” (1959)
In this film, aliens are planning to raise the dead and unleash a horde of zombies upon the earth. The entire movie is awash in nonsensical dialogue and wacky plot points, but some scenes stand out more than others. Take this scene for example, where one of the main characters discusses his fear of the unknown with his wife on their front porch.
#9: Something Stinks
“G.I. Jane” (1997)
Demi Moore is trying to make it as a pseudo-Navy-Seal-in-training, fighting for equal treatment in a male-dominated field. She’s looking to survive the brutal training period without special attention. But when she’s given a 30-second allotment on a grueling obstacle course due to her gender, she confronts her sexist commander, and the conversation turns to…farts.
#8: Gobble, Gobble
“Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me” (1992)
The film adaptation of this cult-classic TV show didn’t translate as well. As a prequel-slash-sequel, there are a lot of confusing elements, tricky twists and turns, and scenes that leave us scratching our heads. One notable one includes a dialogue so ridiculous it can only be expressed through turkey references and “fowl” language.
#7: A Little Girl Talk
“Showgirls” (1995)
No one really expected “Showgirls” to be great, but few expected it to be this awful. Looking to distance herself from her “good girl” image form “Saved by the Bell,” Elizabeth Berkley strikes out as a stripper with a heart of glitter. She lands a job as a showgirl and is working her way up the naked ladder when she has an….interesting conversation with the show’s headliner and her main adversary.
#6: Family Reunion
“Mortal Kombat: Annihilation” (1997)
Film adaptations of video games can be risky. And if the horrible dialogue in “Mortal Kombat: Annihilation” is any indication, campy acting can’t bring bad lines back from the dead. In this scene of unintentionally hilarious dialogue, Kitanan’s mother has made a sudden reappearance from the Outworld to start wreaking havoc on Earth. In case anyone’s confused, she makes it pretty clear she’s going to start with her daughter.
#5: The Ultimate Tough Guy
“Road House” (1989)
Patrick Swayze plays a mysterious bouncer with a high tolerance for stab wounds in this ‘90s classic. He’s been hired to keep order and revive the image of an unruly nightclub. When he gets into a brawl with some of the regulars, and a few corrupt goons, he suffers a stabbing injury to his side. While seeking medical attention, he coolly brushes off getting shanked in a nightclub and the ridiculous dialogue ensues.
#4: Through Rain & Sleet & Apocalypse
“The Postman” (1997)
We all know that in the wake of a nuclear apocalypse, nothing is more important than mail service. Kevin Costner plays a renegade loner turned postal carrier in a world that’s been ravaged by a nuclear holocaust. As humanity struggles for survival, delivering the mail is apparently a huge deal, and this exchange between Costner’s character and a sweet old lady is full of cheesy awfulness.
#3: Love & Bloody Noses
“Pearl Harbor” (2001)
A Michael Bay interpretation of the bombing of Pearl Harbor wouldn’t be complete without explosions and massive destruction. But it’s mainly a story about a love triangle, with World War II as the backdrop. Ben Affleck and Kate Beckinsale play two of the three people in love with each other, and in this scene of particularly corny dialogue, you wonder how anyone was getting laid.
#2: Werewolves are Bad Business
“Howling III” (1987)
In this Australian stand-alone of the werewolf themed horror series, werewolves have evolved into marsupials and just want to live a normal life. The entire movie is preposterous, with the dialogue bordering on asinine. In this scene, a young female werewolf is on the lam from the rest of her werewolf clan for some pretty compelling reasons. Although the dialogue is brief, the horrendous acting and terrible lines are breathtaking.
Before we unveil our top pick, here are a few honorable mentions:
- “Commando” (1985)
- “Predator” (1987)
- “Once Upon a Time in Mexico” (2003)
#1: Everything is Confusing
“The Room” (2003)
This low-budget, comically bad movie is supposed to be about a love triangle between a man, his best friend and his fiancée; but nothing about the film makes sense. Here we see Johnny, played by director-slash-producer-slash-writer Tommy Wiseau, as he retreats to the rooftop for some bro-time with his buddy, Mark. There’s so much wrong with the scene from start to finish, including the inappropriate laughter and awkward transitions. It’s so bad; it’s awesome.
Do you agree with our list? What’s your favorite terrible movie dialogue? For more entertaining Top 10s published every day, be sure to subscribe to WatchMojo.com.