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Top 10 Things Guests Should Never Do at a Wedding

Top 10 Things Guests Should Never Do at a Wedding
VOICE OVER: Lisa Yang
Script written by Savannah Sher

A lot of effort goes into planning a wedding. Besides having a lot of money invested in the event, the newlyweds are already under tons of pressure the day of. As wedding guests, here's a list of things people should NEVER do at a wedding! Don't tackle anyone for the bouquet, don't hog the spotlight by proposing to your significant other on the same day unless you have permission to do so, don't text during the wedding ceremony and don't get drunk at the reception because you will most likely embarrass yourself and piss of the bride and groom.

#10: DON’T Tackle Anyone for the Bouquet

When it comes to the bouquet toss, this can be one of the most stressful moments for wedding attendees – whether they’re single ladies or in a relationship. If you believe in the superstition that the lucky girl who catches the bride’s bouquet will be the next to get married, it can be a high pressure situation for even the best behaved. But you should never elbow people out of your way in your quest to be the one who catches it. If it happens, it happens. You can’t force it – just like getting engaged.

#9: DON’T Text During the Ceremony / Leave Your Ringer On

In our modern high-tech world, you’ll be hard-pressed to find a situation where people don’t have their phones on them. While we’re used to being glued to our screens at all times, weddings are one occasion where we should definitely unplug and enjoy the moment. Of course you don’t want your cell phone ringing during the ceremony, but you also want to avoid browsing on your phone or texting during key events. If you don’t think you can stop yourself from scrolling or swiping for a few hours, maybe consider leaving your smartphone in the car or your hotel room.

#8: DON’T Start a Fight

Fortunately, weddings are an opportunity to bring together all the people you love into one room. Unfortunately, this means that some drama is unavoidable, with old family feuds bubbling to the surface and tension between relatives possibly running high. Whatever grievances you may have with a family member, an old friend, or even an ex, you need to remember that this isn’t the time to air them; this is a happy occasion to celebrate the bride and groom, and you don’t want to take the focus off of them by getting into a fight. Besides, isn’t that what Thanksgiving’s for?

#7: DON’T Get in the Photographer’s Way

With the caliber of today’s cell phone cameras, everyone thinks they’re a world-class photographer. But after a bride and groom have spent thousands on a professional wedding photographer, it’s disrespectful to get in their way by crouching in the aisle or holding your phone up to film during the ceremony. Not only can you prevent them from getting the best possible shot; it also kills the moment if everyone’s watching the big day on their cell phone screens.

#6: DON’T Propose

Weddings are romantic and can feel like the perfect time to express your love and devotion to your partner, but you should think twice about proposing on someone else’s big day. It seems to happen in cute YouTube videos all the time, but stealing the bride and groom’s thunder can be a big no-no. This also applies to other big announcements, like pregnancies. Brides get one day that’s supposed to be all about them so you shouldn’t put the focus on yourself instead. However if you’re dead-set on doing this, at least speak to the bride and groom first to make sure they’re on board.

#5: DON’T Try to Switch Seats

One of the most stressful parts of planning a wedding can be organizing the seating chart. You have to be sure to keep friends and families together, while avoiding seating anyone next to someone they have bad blood with. Of course, there are no perfect solutions and some guests may still feel like they got the short end of the stick. But, even if you’re unhappy with your seat, trying to switch tables is not the answer. There’s a reason you’re sitting at the table you’ve been assigned to, and if there’s one thing you don’t want to do at a wedding it’s mess with the bride and groom’s carefully made plans.

#4: DON’T Wear White

This is an old-school rule but it still applies today. Wearing white as a wedding guest is still frowned upon, and it’s always best to choose any other shade—even black—for someone else’s ceremony. In fact, you should probably avoid any shade of cream, off-white, ivory, or eggshell to be completely safe. Of course, there are some exceptions: wearing a patterned dress that includes white isn’t a big deal, and wearing something like a shawl or jacket in white should also be okay. But a white dress with a ten-foot train is definitely out.

#3: DON’T Complain to the Newlyweds

Couples put months of planning into their wedding and often invest a lot of their personal savings into their big day. There are a million little decisions to be made, and the last thing they need is guests complaining about the choices they’ve made. Whether it’s the lack of an open bar, the quality of food, or the style of music, the couple doesn’t need to hear your opinions on the details of their ceremony or reception. If you have a problem that genuinely needs to be addressed, mention it to a member of the wedding party or a member of staff at the venue rather than the newly weds.
#2: DON’T Get Drunk at the Reception

Open bars can be disastrous for wedding guests who just can’t help but drink excessively. While it’s okay to let loose a little at a wedding reception, you don’t want to make a fool of yourself and distract from the couple’s attention. If you’re worried that you have a tendency to indulge a little too much, try to set yourself a drink limit or match the pace of a responsible friend. Say no to shots, say yes to water and juice, and consider sticking to beer and wine instead of hard liquor.

Before we unveil our top pick, here are a few honorable mentions:
- DON’T Wear Something Scandalous
- DON’T Be Late
- DON’T Let Your Kids Run Wild

#1: DON’T Give an Embarrassing Toast

This can definitely go hand in hand with drinking too much, but whether you’re drunk or sober, the easiest way to leave a lasting negative impression at a wedding is with a bad toast. There are a lot of different ways to mess up your reception speech: you might ramble on for too long, you might tell inappropriate stories about the bride or groom, or you might go off on a tangent and talk about yourself. If you’ve been asked to give a speech, do some planning in advance so that you have at least a rough outline of what you want to say. And if you haven’t been asked to speak... don’t.

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