Top 10 Times Eric Cartman Went Full Cartman

From the beginning, it was clear that Cartman had an easily-triggered temper. In the tenth episode, we see how quickly Cartman can be sent into full-on tantrum mode. To attend his over-the-top birthday, the other kids need to bring the gifts that Cartman requests. Where most of the guests comply, Kyle fails to acquire a Red Mega Man. Instead, he gives him Ants in the Pants, a real product that Matt Stone calls “the lamest game ever.” Throwing a spoiled fit, Cartman attacks Kyle, wishing he was dead. It’s one of the first times we see Cartman get physically violent over virtually nothing. Although any other kid would kill to have a party like Cartman’s, he’s no longer in a celebratory mood, sending everyone home.

Cartman longs to be where the Sea People are. Upon arriving in the mail, Cartman doesn’t receive a kingdom of mermaids, but rather, a package of brine shrimp. Cartman takes out his disappointment on his so-called friends. Naturally, he targets Kyle for being Jewish. He proceeds to criticize Tweek’s inability to button his shirt and Stan for having a girlfriend. As Cartman releases his anger, heartbreak also washes over as he laments about the falsely advertised sea society that never was. As far as Cartman is concerned, the fake Sea People can be sent down the drain. When Stan suggests putting them in the teacher’s coffee, though, Cartman immediately perks up. In barely a minute, he goes from 0 to 180 and back to 0.

After Scott Tenorman cheats him out of his money, Cartman is hellbent on getting a refund. Tenorman pushes Cartman to the edge of desperation and humility, leaving him broken when the money is set ablaze. As Cartman’s $16.12 burns, another fire is set within him. If Cartman was angry before, his blood is litterally boiling now. Getting his money back is no longer Cartman’s endgame. He’s committed to a different kind of payback. With the rain pouring down on him, Cartman lets out a roar encompassing all of his rage, sorrow, and agony. It’s a scream that says, “I’m going to stop at nothing until the one who wronged me pays… even if it means turning his parents into chili.”

Unable to find a suggestive photo of him and Butters, Cartman jumps to the most logical conclusion: Kyle took it! Interrupting a friendly game of HORSE, Cartman immediately starts firing off unfounded accusations… and anti-semitism. Despite having no evidence, Cartman puts up his dukes, threatening to beat Kyle if he doesn’t cough up the photo. Cartman also drags Stan and Kenny into his vendetta against Kyle, sounding more and more like a Hitler Youth. The constant hate speech at his people’s expense prompts Kyle to give Cartman the slightest of punches to the arm. At first, Cartman sounds annoyed… then angry… then like a whiny baby, even though Kyle barely touched him. You win this round, Kyle… and you’ll probably win the others too.

For Cartman, Christian rock isn’t about the music or the message. It’s about going platinum and rubbing the success in his friends’ faces. With a million albums sold, Cartman’s prayers are seemingly answered. He puts on an extravagant celebration to commemorate this milestone, but his victory becomes a defeat. Turns out that Christian music doesn’t give out platinum albums… at least in “South Park’s” universe. Cartman isn’t pleased with his Myrrh album, shattering the prize. He also destroys his career with some choice comments about God and his son. Although Trey Parker isn’t sure, he thinks Cartman’s words regarding Jesus might be a first for television. Matt Stone was left questioning why the censors let them do this. In any case, Cartman gets his comeuppance.

As per usual, Cartman’s berserk behavior stems from a little problem. The issue in this case is literally little. Rampaging through the cafeteria, Cartman nearly flips a table when a physical indicates that he’s not as well-endowed as his classmates. At least that’s what Cartman assumes. The measurements are actually for overall height, although it turns out Cartman is indeed packing the tiniest package. We can’t speak for all toxic males, but it’s clear that Cartman is compensating for something. The bigger he goes, the smaller he is. Cartman should’ve been sent to anger management a long time ago. His meltdown in this Season 15 episode finally leads to some overdue counseling (not that it has much of an impact).

When the other kids become suspicious of his fake iPad, Cartman snaps at his mom for not purchasing him a real one. He harasses her into taking him to Best Buy, but Liane would rather they get a cheaper alternative. Although Liane usually caves to her son’s demands, she refreshingly lays down the law for a change. To say that Cartman creates a scene would be an understatement. Making false claims that could get her mother thrown in jail, Cartman leaves with nothing. His tirade isn’t over, however. Cartman vents to Dr. Phil about his mom before cursing out God. Liane wouldn’t cause Cartman physical pain for his actions, but the Creator doesn’t hesitate to send down a lightning bolt.

Nobody is having a worse holiday than the Broflovskis, being forced to return Ike to his Canadian birth parents. This inspires the adults of South Park to be charitable rather than buy their children Christmas presents. While many kids are disappointed, nobody is more pissed off than Cartman, who’s all too eager to blame Kyle. Cartman has threatened Kyle before, but rarely has he appeared more committed to beating him up. A mission to Canada subdues Cartman’s wrath for a little while, but upon missing the Christmas deadline, he goes back into “Punch-Out” mode. This builds to a hilariously anti-climatic showdown with Kyle delivering a gentle jab and Cartman making a face that required the animators to draw him a whole new head.

They hang out, but are Cartman and Kyle truly friends? Kyle doesn’t think so, hence why Cartman isn’t invited to Casa Bonita for his birthday. Cartman begs Kyle to take him, almost earning our sympathy. It’s too little too late for Kyle, driving Cartman to unleash a profanity-laced freak-out. While Cartman is infamous for overreacting, seeing him shift gears this suddenly still feels like whiplash to the audience. Cartman storms off, only to return with his tail between his legs. Kyle dismisses him again, though, setting off another verbal attack. The way Cartman tells Kyle that he hopes he dies is so simple and childish - yet so brutal. There’s a furious finality to Cartman’s tone of voice. Of course, this is far from over.

Before we unveil our top pick, here are a few honorable mentions.

Cartman Won’t Be Moving Along From This

Ice Cream Can’t Ease His Justifiable Anger

We’re Sure the “FernGully” Filmmakers Feel Like Cartman

Romance Is Officially Dead

While Trash Talking to the Lord

Cartman’s foul mouth usually gets himself and others into trouble. When all hell breaks loose in the “South Park” movie, though, his unhinged anger and unfiltered vocabulary save the day. With the V-chip in his brain going haywire, Cartman comes up with some creative words to shock Saddam. In addition to discharging all of the profanity he’s been keeping locked up, Cartman takes on the appearance of an anime character. While “South Park” hasn’t always been known for state-of-the-art animation, they went all-out here with intense angles, 3D effects, and an epic camera spin. The language doesn’t hold back either, capping things off with a profane use of Barbra Streisand’s name. We’ve never been happier or more enthralled to see Cartman go berserk.


What’s your favorite Cartman freak out? Let us know in the comments.