Top 10 Upcoming Movies That Might Suck in 2019
Check out the voting page for this list and add your picks: WatchMojo.comsuggest/Top+10+Upcoming+Movies+That+Might+Suck+This+2019. Special thanks to our user Risk Gambler for suggesting this idea!
Script written by Nick Spake
#10: “Charlie’s Angels” (2019)
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In recent years, Columbia Pictures has become known for digging up nostalgic properties in the hope of attracting a new generation of fans. For every “Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle,” though, there’s a “Total Recall,” “RoboCop,” or “Ghostbusters.” The new “Charlie’s Angels,” starring Kristen Stewart, Naomi Scott, and Ella Balinska, seems like another shameless attempt to milk a profit from an established brand name. Whether you grew up with the 70s TV series or the early 2000s movies, nobody was begging for this reboot, and director Elizabeth Banks will need to bring something really unique to the table to generate interest. At least after 2011’s short-lived TV reboot, there’s seemingly nowhere to go but up.
#9: “Dark Phoenix” (2019)
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From Bryan Singer’s original film, to “Deadpool,” to “Logan,” the “X-Men” franchise has been responsible for some of the best superhero movies ever. At the same time, the series has been anything but consistent, with disappointments like “X-Men: Apocalypse,” “X-Men Origins: Wolverine,” and “X-Men: The Last Stand.” “Dark Phoenix” is essentially supposed to be an apology for the later film, which botched one of the most celebrated story arcs from the comics. Granted, we’re not sure how this film could possibly be worse than the third “X-Men” movie, which was so poorly-received that it was eradicated from the continuity. Given Fox’s shaky track record and multiple release delays, however, we can’t help but be skeptical.
#8: “Shaft” (2019)
The original “Shaft” trilogy was clearly made at the height of the Blaxploitation craze, but that’s largely part of its charm. Since these movies were products of their time, we’re not sure why Hollywood decided to resurrect the franchise in the year 2000. What’s even stranger is that we’re getting another sequel almost two decades later. Was anyone aside from the Fresh Prince asking for this? The sequel sees the return of Richard Roundtree as John Shaft I and Samuel L. Jackson as his nephew while Jessie Usher debuts as a third generation Shaft. The fact that director Tim Story previously made the first two “Fantastic Four” and “Ride Along” movies doesn’t exactly bode well.
#7: “Grudge” (2019)
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In many respects, “The Grudge” series has mirrored “The Ring” movies. Both started off as Japanese horror flicks that inspired successful American remakes. It wasn’t long until these remakes got the sequel treatment, but the later installments didn’t perform nearly as well as their predecessors. Paramount tried to breathe new life into “The Ring” franchise in 2017, but critics and audiences were generally left underwhelmed. Will this 2019 reboot of “The Grudge” suffer the same fate? Only time will tell, but if this film actually manages to sink lower than the direct-to-video “The Grudge 3,” Kayako isn’t the only one who will be left holding a grudge.
#6: “Sonic the Hedgehog” (2019)
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Sonic’s no stranger to cinema, having made a cameo in “Wreck-It Ralph.” He also starred in a 1996 anime that was later rebranded as a movie. And Jaleel White reprised the Blue Blur’s voice in a 2013 fan film. Still, a $125 million movie centered on Sonic doesn’t seem like the wisest investment, especially since his latest games haven’t really hit bullseyes. We could potentially see this working if the filmmakers draw inspiration from the “Sonic SatAM” show. Given the comedic talent involved, however, we’re expecting something closer to “Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog.” Also, Jim Carrey as Dr. Robotnik? That’s probably the weirdest video game movie casting choice since Dennis Hopper played King Koopa.
#5: “Alita: Battle Angel” (2019)
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We could see this adaptation of Yukito Kishiro’s manga going either way. On one hand, the film was directed by Robert Rodriguez and producer James Cameron co-wrote the screenplay. The cast is also quite impressive with names like Christoph Waltz, Jennifer Connelly, and Mahershala Ali. On the other hand, YIKES! What big eyes you have! The main character’s design is an acquired taste to say the least. Some find it visually intriguing while others are just creeped out by the uncanny valley effect. The mixed reception might explain why “Alita: Battle Angel” was originally supposed to come out in July 2018, but has since been pushed back multiple times.
#4: “A Madea Family Funeral” (2019)
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Talk about beating a dead horse. The “Madea” movies are a cinematic infestation that’s not going away any time soon. It doesn’t matter how much critics pan these films or how many Razzies Tyler Perry wins for playing the titular “mad black woman.” Based on the box office returns, there’s obviously an audience out there for these movies, meaning we can count on a new entry every year or so. That being said, there’s little doubt that “A Madea Family Funeral” will have longtime fans laughing all the way to the graveyard. Others, meanwhile, are likely keeping their fingers crossed that this is the final nail in the coffin.
#3: “The Angry Birds Movie 2” (2019)
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Despite becoming a financial hit, “The Angry Birds Movie” was primarily viewed as a blatant cash grab deprived of humor or charm. Of course, it’s not like we were expecting much from a movie based on a smartphone game with little story or well-defined characters that quite frankly peaked in popularity years ago. Alas, it’s all about the almighty dollar, meaning a sequel is crashing into theaters this year. What’s more, the film has caged up a flock of voice talent to squander, including Rachel Bloom, Sterling K. Brown, and Leslie Jones. While we’d like to think the newcomers will liven up the material, we’re already smelling a bad egg.
#2: “UglyDolls” (2019)
There appears to be a mentality in Hollywood that if something exists, it needs a feature film adaptation. So, it shouldn’t come as a surprise that we’ll soon be living in a world with an Uglydolls movie. Based on a line of a hideously adorable plush dolls, this project has been in the works since 2011, eventually finding a home at STXfilms. To be fair, if “The Lego Movie” proved anything, it’s that films based on toys have the potential be infinitely better than expected. Then again, if “The Emoji Movie” proved anything, it’s that some feature-length commercials deliver exactly what we expected. We can only hope “UglyDolls” won’t follow in the latter’s footsteps.
Before we get to our top pick, here are a few honorable or – depending how they turn out – dishonorable mentions.
“Terminator 6” (2019)
“Minecraft: The Movie” (2019)
#1: “Dora the Explorer” (2019)
With each new announcement regarding this film, it just sounds more and more bizarre. For starters, it’s a live-action version of an educational cartoon that ran on Nick Jr. Second, Dora’s not a little girl in this interpretation, but a teenager played by Isabela Moner from “Transformers: The Last Knight.” Speaking of “Transformers,” Michael Bay’s production company was reported to be tied to the project at one point, although this has since been debunked. Even so, “Dora the Explorer” has never exactly screamed, “cinematic!” Honestly, if director James Bobin somehow manages to pull this off, it might be the biggest shock in cinematic history. In any case, we’ll always have CollegeHumor’s interpretation.
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