Top 5 Times Carrie from Sex and the City Was the Hero of the Story & 5 Times She Was the Villain

Hands up if you’ve ever been in a situation where you tripped up and fell flat on your face— literally or figuratively. So basically everyone, right? When Carrie’s asked to appear in a fashion show, she’s initially reluctant because, well, society tells us that we regular folk have no business mingling among models. With some urging from her friends and Dolce & Gabbana, she finally agrees, and she really looks fabulous. Unfortunately, a little hiccup on the runway leaves her, as Stanford so elegantly puts it, “oh my god she’s fashion roadkill.” Most of us may have run for the hills, but Carrie shows us how to rise up, dust ourselves off, and strut forward with our heads high.

When Carrie told Samantha about her affair with Big, Samantha proved that she barely had a judgmental bone in her body. Sadly, the same can’t be said for Carrie. After seeing Samantha handling a…package, she makes a big show of telling anyone who will listen what she thinks. If she had just knocked on the door before entering, this whole thing could’ve been avoided. Eventually, Samantha gets fed up and calls Carrie out on her attitude. After all, what two consenting adults do is nobody else’s business, especially when it doesn’t hurt anyone. Meanwhile, Carrie was cheating and causing actual harm, yet Samantha stood by her without judgment. The irony’s pretty hard to miss.

In the final season, Carrie decides to move to Paris with Aleksandr Petrovsky, even after Miranda warns her that it’s an idealistic move. It turns out she’s right. Paris doesn’t feel like the City of Love when you’re constantly being stood up by your other half. During a fight that accidentally turns physical, Carrie finally admits out loud that coming to Paris was a mistake. She tells Petrovsky that she wants true love and that she shouldn’t have to give up that dream. Whether it’s romance, a career change, traveling the globe, or whatever your heart desires, Carrie reminds us that we should always follow our dreams and never settle for anything less.

This episode has some surprisingly progressive takes on gender fluidity for its time. Unfortunately, Carrie ruins the mood with some backward and offensive comments about bisexuality. She dates a younger man named Sean, and things are going well until they start talking about their dating histories. And it’s not just Carrie—her friends’ reactions the next day are cringeworthy, too. Hearing so many outdated opinions is just awful. This episode hasn’t aged well at all—honestly, it wasn’t great even when it aired. Still, Carrie’s total erasure of bisexuality is absolutely shocking and totally unforgivable. The only thing we want erased is this storyline from our memories.

When you reach a certain age, you find a sizeable chunk of your paychecks going towards buying gifts for friends who are either getting married or welcoming a new baby. While that’s all well and good for them, those aren’t necessarily the milestones everyone chooses, so where are the presents for the rest of us? When Carrie attends a ‘Welcome to the World baby’ party, her beloved shoes get stolen. The host isn’t too sympathetic and even judges Carrie on her life choices. Yeah, maybe we wouldn’t spend as much as Carrie on footwear, but we totally respect her right to shoes. Also, why shouldn’t other achievements and life choices be celebrated just as much?

While, yes, we completely respect Carrie’s right to spend her money however she wants, you’ve got to admit she could probably use a reality check about living within her means. This becomes painfully clear when she needs to buy back her apartment from Aidan and discovers she lacks the funds. Unable to secure a bank loan, Carrie whines to her friends, who, except Charlotte, offer to assist. The next day, Carrie comes to Charlotte’s home to berate her for not offering to help. Erm, entitled much? Seriously, where does she get off? Still, Charlotte ultimately steps up. Let’s not forget this isn’t the only time Carrie prioritizes herself over the sentimentality of Charlotte’s ring.

We’d say Carrie is pretty self-absorbed about 90% of the time. However, we can’t deny how much she loves her friends. She skips saying a formal Bon Voyage to Big to be with Miranda when she goes into labor. Carrie also supports Miranda after her mom’s passing and stands by her during a crucial life decision. Not only that, but she also accompanies Miranda to the abortion clinic. This is one of the few times where Carrie genuinely comes judgment-free. When Miranda asks her for advice, she doesn’t jump in; she just listens while Miranda figures out what’s best for her. Now, that’s the kind of friend we could always use.

Aidan was initially set up as the anti-Big —a genuinely good guy who really cares for Carrie and doesn’t play games with her heart. However, Carrie has no problem toying with him and doesn’t seem to appreciate his good qualities. Their relationship even starts off with a lie. We could pull up endless examples, but let’s focus on two of the worst. First, remember when her laptop crashed, and she was super mean to Aidan when he was just trying to help? But the real kicker is when she invited Big to Aidan’s cabin— and yes, this was post-affair. Seriously, what was she thinking!? Why Aidan ever took her back is beyond us.

Before we unveil our top pick, here are a few honorable mentions.

Hero: Taking Care of Samantha When She Had the Flu, “All or Nothing”
It Takes Some Friend to Volunteer to Hang Out with All Those Germs

Villain: Sending Aidan to Help Miranda, “Time and Punishment”
That Bathroom Rug Was More Comforting than Carrie!

Hero: Defending Her Friends, “Luck Be an Old Lady”
No, You Don’t Come for Carrie’s Friends Like That

Villain: Her Problematic Views on Therapy, “Games People Play”
Coming from the Person Who Basically Uses Everyone She Knows as Her Own Personal Therapist?

Okay, hear us out. We love Aidan as much as the next “SATC” fan, but we think Carrie made the right call here. In the heat of the moment, she might have genuinely believed Aidan was the one she wanted to spend her life with. But after some reflection, she realized she wasn’t ready for that commitment. So, isn’t it better for everyone if they don’t rush into something so major? No one should feel pressured to make life-changing decisions before they’re ready. Sure, it sucked to see Aidan get his heart broken again, but if he really loved Carrie, shouldn’t he have respected her feelings too? Good for her for standing her ground.

We hold Carrie and Big equally responsible for this one. Big was married, and Carrie was with Aidan, but that didn’t stop them from sneaking around together. If it had been a one-time lapse in judgment, maybe we could’ve forgiven them. But they carried on their affair for far too long. Carrie seems aware, deep down, that she’s hurting Aidan and Natasha, yet it’s not enough to make her stop. In true Carrie fashion, she even tries to paint herself as the victim in this mess. Naturally, they get caught. Poor Natasha ends up losing both her marriage and a tooth. Carrie even has the nerve to track her down to ease her own conscience.

On a scale where hero sits on one side and villain on the other, where would you place Carrie? Let us know in the comments.