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Bestiality Bills, Kanye Busted & Brain Uploads: The Dispatch Ep. 17

VO: Adrian Sousa
Script Written by Jesse Polowin & Adrian Sousa Welcome to The Dispatch, WatchMojo.com's look at the weirdest and coolest news stories from the previous week of human existence. This week we’re looking at Kanye getting exposed on Twitter, bestiality bans in New Hampshire, and Matrix-esque brain uploads.
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Bestiality Bills, Kanye Busted & Brain Uploads: The Dispatch Ep. 17


Brain uploads, Kanye the Thief and bestiality bans! Just because you don’t need to know about these stories, doesn’t mean they won’t interest you. Welcome to WatchMojo.com, and this is The Dispatch, where we bring you the Internet’s weirdest and coolest stories! This week we’re looking at Kanye getting exposed on Twitter, bestiality bans in New Hampshire, and Matrix-esque brain uploads.

#3: Skeezy Yeezy

After the madness that was the album release of Kanye’s “The Life of Pablo,” to his daily Twitter rants and everything in between. Well, now he’s been caught using The Pirate Bay, the notorious torrent site, by none other than EDMs biggest troll: Dead-Mao-Five. Err, Deadmau5. After Kanye tweeted a picture of his laptop display, one of the open browser tabs was on a Pirate Bay page to illegally download some music production software. Deadmau5 quickly tweeted saying “What the fuck Kanye West, can’t afford serum? Dick.” People use this stuff all the time, but for someone like Kanye – a frequent peddler of Tidal, the streaming service nobody asked for – it hits a particularly harsh note. Kanye’s reply? Asking the Mau5 to perform at his daughter’s birthday with a Minnie Mau5 head.

#2: Bestiality Ban

For the uninitiated, New Hampshire is a state in the New England area of the Eastern United states known somewhat for its icy peaks, thousands of lakes and it’s famous state motto – Live Free or die. But according to a recent hearing, it’s taking on a reputation as a haven for dog fuckers. Supporters of a bill to ban bestiality told policy makers that New Hampshire is one of 10 states that doesn’t explicitly prohibit sexual contact with animals. Proponents believe the bill will help with prosecution, as previous cases of animal sexual abuse have not resulted in felony charges for the abuser. This was problematic according to supporters because it did not treat the offense as they see it; a gateway to human sexual abuse. Surprisingly, some farmers are actually against it, as they believe it could cause complications with their day-to-day work. To this, supporters respond “let’s just pass this bill already and outlaw animal cruelty.” Fair play.

#1: Brain Uploads

The Matrix taught us a lot about reality, cognition and the bendiness of spoons. It also made everyone want to learn kung-fu instantly. Well that may still be a pipe dream, but a research group out of California called HRL Laboratories have made a breakthrough that could get us that much closer. After studying the electric signals in the brain of a trained pilot, they fed the data via electrode-embedded head caps into novice subjects using flight simulation. The subjects responded positively, learning specific tasks 33 percent better than a placebo group. Lead researcher Dr. Matthew Phillips calls it a “brain stimulation system” and believes it could one day be used to teach language, prepare for exams and help develop practical skills like driving a car. Hopefully one day they’ll take after us and build a suggestion page for new skills! Vape tricks will be only one brain-stimulation session away! Woo!

So, what skill would you wanna learn first from a brain upload?
For your weekly dispatch of offbeat news stories and Top 10 lists published every day, be sure to subscribe to WatchMojo.com.
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