Topless Virgins, Beer Fountains & CryoBrains: The Dispatch Ep. 14

Topless Virgins, Beer Fountains & CryoBrains: The Dispatch Ep. 14

Topless virgins, beer fountains and frozen brains! Just because you don’t need to know about these stories, doesn’t mean they won’t interest you. Welcome to WatchMojo.com, and this is The Dispatch, where we bring you the Internet’s weirdest and coolest stories! This week we’re looking at topless virgin protestors, fountains of beer and cryogenics.

#3 Brain Freeze

They did it! Researchers from 21st Century Medicine won the prize that we’ve all grown up hoping to win: the Small Mammal Brain Preservation Prize from the Brain Preservation Foundation. Sorry, what? Let me start from the top. Apparently, there actually is a group called the Brain Preservation Foundation, who gives prizes out to research groups that successfully – you guessed it – preserve brains. In this case, for the first time ever, a mammalian brain has been preserved; all of the neurons and synapse of this rabbit brain are in perfect shape without suffering the usual dehydration and crushing of neural connections from the cryonic process. This is huge for the cryopreservation field of science, as many sceptics in the community didn’t believe this feat was possible. However, we have to mention, the brain wasn’t thawed out and placed in another rabbit or hooked up to a machine; it was simply perfectly preserved. But, things are looking up for Austin Powers-worthy technology!

#2 Slovenian Beer Fountains

Whether you’re checking out the world’s largest chest of drawers in North Carolina, Iceland’s penis museum or the temple of rats in India, there are plenty of absurd and unsettling ways to drop your cash when travelling. So, you might want to consider adding Zalec, Slovenia to your next trip itinerary, as city officials in the small European town have approved plans for the construction of an enormous fountain - a beer fountain. Visitors to this sobriety-slaughterer will be offered three helpings of local Slovenian beers served in a commemorative mug for 6 euros. Not lacking protestors however, local mayor Janko Kos said, “it’s true the fountain won’t be cheap. But, it’s a development project, a tourism product.” And here’s a pro tip; next time you want to drunkenly dive into a fountain, use this one to keep the debauchery flowing!

#1 Topless Virgin Protests

President Obama incentivized American businesses to hire immigrant workers by offering around $3000 in bonuses. This benefits the employer and the hired individual. Well it’s not really the same story for female residents of Ladysmith, South Africa, whose mayor recently introduced a bursary for not doing something. Well, technically, not doing someone. The “Maidens Bursary,” a scholarship offered to female virgins, was created by the Kwazulu-Natal municipality in order to fund higher education for young women, but it’s being highly criticized by local groups who say that in addition to being an invasion of privacy, the bursary is promising opportunity only to those that choose abstinence. Well, that criticism was countered by angry topless virgins who protested the public outcry. Yeesh. The Mayor of the region says the incentive was designed to help reduce teenage pregnancy and the spread of HIV, while also widening job opportunities. He clearly has the virgin vote in the next election, and their efforts must have caught the eye of others. Oh, the power the human breast can yield.

So, what other liquid deserves a fountain?

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