Top 10 Funniest Stewie Griffin Cutaways

“Inside Family Guy”
We for one love crepes, but we’d be lying if we said Stewie’s under-the-table business wasn’t humorous. In this meta episode, we see the characters “behind the scenes” as actors on “Family Guy.” At one point, James Woods checks in on Stewie in his dressing room, revealing the youngster isn’t a fan of his own show. Instead, he reveals it’s just a means to an end to keep afloat his side hustle of providing insecure men delicious crepes. We don’t know if the two things are related like Stewie says, but we also wouldn’t be ones to refuse a discreet crepe if it meant we didn’t have to share it.

“Lottery Fever”
If you’ve ever been on a budget, you know sacrifices must be made. When the Griffins run into money trouble, the family dog Brian is alarmed before Lois reminds him of his delayed grooming appointment. We’re treated to a flashback depicting the disturbingly overgrown pooch walking into the kitchen. His ghastly appearance combined with Lois doing her best not to notice is tremendous. The comedic scene is enhanced after Stewie falls out of Brian’s tangled mane, confused and delirious. Are we the only ones wondering how long Stewie was trapped in there?

“Believe It or Not, Joe’s Walking on Air”
Eviscerating celebrities is an old pastime for “Family Guy.” In this case, Stewie remarks on the supposed worthlessness of well-known Irish actor Colin Farrell. The lengthy cutaway features Farrell hanging out on a street corner while Stewie tears him apart. The sardonic baby rants on everything from his wardrobe to his personality, all while Farrell calmly stands there and takes it. Before long, Stewie decides he’s had enough and handles business with a laser gun. We’re not sure if Farrell has some outstanding beef with the show’s creator Seth MacFarlane. Regardless, Stewie’s cynical monologues are something that we will never tire of.

“The Dating Game”
When Stewie finds out he suffers from scoliosis, he’s forced to wear a back brace wherever he goes. This leads to him getting all sorts of positive attention, prompting this hilarious cutaway. In this bit, Stewie looks to cross the street and is seemingly waved along by a driver in a Porsche Cayenne. Yet when he enters the street, the car immediately knocks him over. It’s a funny and unexpected beat as it is, but the real kicker comes when the driver gives her explanation. We all know how self-centered and rude drivers can be, and this exaggerates that notion to hilarious effect.

“The Blind Side”
Just when you think you’ve seen it all, Stewie continues to prove he’s full of surprises. After reminding Brian of his talent and ingenuity, we’re treated to the proof of his words. During the cutaway, Stewie schools Elizabeth Berkley in the fine art of pole dancing on the set of “Showgirls.” His erotic performance paired with his cocky attitude is bound to tickle the viewers with hilarity. Plus, seeing Stewie show his effeminate side almost always results in a big laugh. We know where to go for dancing lessons from now on!

“Screwed the Pooch”
As the show progresses through its seasons, Stewie’s sexuality proves to be more and more pronounced. As early as the third season, we learn about his interesting relaxation habits. As he recalls one of his favorite ways to wind down, we cut to a nightclub full of loud music and shirtless men, Stewie among them. The scene is made funnier by Stewie yelling about his relationship with the owner before jamming out to the electronic beats. Judging by some of Stewie’s later fantasies, the only thing missing is a buff, humanoid version of his teddy bear Rupert, but this cutaway makes us laugh all the same.

“Jungle Love”
Drawn-out punchlines are an infamous staple of “Family Guy,” and in Season 4 we’re provided with one that’s all too humorous. After getting irritated by Will Ferrell’s performance in “Bewitched,” Stewie goes on quite the journey to seek revenge. His long trek from one coast to another is rather dull and mundane, lulling the viewer into a false sense of security. However, once he finally arrives in Los Angeles, it doesn’t take him long to show up on Ferrell’s doorstep. The tyke delivers a blow and a pent-up one-liner after much anticipation. Add “petty” to Stewie’s long list of personality traits.

“Bill & Peter’s Bogus Journey”
Looking back, we know our early artwork weren’t masterpieces, but most of us at least had supportive authority figures to make them feel special. But Lois and Peter are hardly role models. In this cutaway, Brian reminds Stewie of the time he showed his parents his drawing. They feign admiration for it while he’s there, but as soon as he turns his back they all but literally rip it to shreds. We don’t get to see the drawing, but we find it hard to believe it’s that bad to warrant this kind of response. Still, it’s heartbreakingly hilarious to watch Stewie overhear what they plan to do to it.

“Brian Goes Back to College”
There’s an important rule to remember in show business: know your audience. When Brian is offered a gig working for The New Yorker, Stewie scoffs at him. He tells Brian that he won’t fit in, just like Stewie didn’t at Woodstock. Cut to a hilarious image of Stewie as a hippie, complete with a soul patch and acoustic guitar. He scolds the audience for smoking marijuana and the boos rain down. As if that wasn’t bad enough, he goes on to perform a song praising the government. Definitely not the best place to mix politics with pleasure, ol’ Stew.

Before we unveil our top pick, here are a few honorable mentions.

Stewie’s Sarcasm Brings Humor to a Dark Moment

Stewie as an Adult Is a Perfect Way to Guarantee Nightmares

Stewie Really Shouldn’t Be Allowed to Give Motivational Speeches

Be Careful What You Post on Social Media

“Lois Kills Stewie”
As evil as Stewie can be, sometimes you just have to feel bad for the little guy. After the evil genius kidnaps Brian, he claims that he’ll soon achieve greatness, just as he should have when he auditioned for “American Idol.” We cut to an atrociously tone-deaf performance of Stewie belting out a Debbie Gibson classic. What follows is a hysterical deadpan delivery of criticism from the one and only Simon Cowell. The remaining judges offer their two cents as well before Stewie leaves the audition in tears. At least Stewie has a time machine to go back in time and erase that horrible memory!