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Immortality, Smell Dating & Cliffhangers: The Dispatch Ep. 22

VO: Adrian Sousa
Script Written by Jesse Polowin & Adrian Sousa Welcome to The Dispatch,'s look at the weirdest and coolest news stories from the previous week of human existence. This week we’re looking at a major cliffhanger, dating by scent and cyber immortality.

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Smell Dating, Immortality & Cliffhangers: The Dispatch Ep. 22

Just because you don’t need to know about these stories, doesn’t mean they won’t interest you. Welcome to, and this is The Dispatch, where we bring you the Internet’s weirdest and coolest stories! This week we’re looking at a major cliff hanger, dating by scent and cyber immortality.

#3: Cliff Caper

People living and working in LA know it has one of the most frustrating commutes in the U-S and A, as a normal commute can take up to 81 percent longer during peak hours. But, the daily grind took on a whole other meaning this Monday for one motorist, who narrowly escaped driving his SUV off a cliff. After losing control along Malibu Canyon road, the motorist was left dangling over a curb and just managed to climb out of the vehicle. Disoriented and in shock, the motorist wandered into the road and was struck by a passing tour bus, but somehow survived the ordeal. He was treated by the Los Angeles County Fire Department and is currently recovering in a local hospital. Glad he’s doing all right! But unless this was just a major shout out to Steven Tyler and Aerosmith, we are very concerned that the Terminator has once again returned.

#2: Smell Dating

Mail order brides? How about mail odor brides? SCENT is the brainchild of two New York artists that seek to match up potential lovers based entirely on scent. The service provides single people with a t-shirt in the mail, which they are instructed to wear for three days, while simultaneously avoiding deodorants and perfumes. Once three days have passed, the participant sends the t-shirt back and receives 10 t-shirts from other singles. If two participants determine one another’s odor to be satisfactory, SCENT provides them with the necessary contact information, but that’s it. No details on gender, sexual orientation or age are provided. An alternative to the selfie-saturated dating services available to the public, the project points to studies suggesting a link between human attraction and body odor. Participants would do well to avoid their grandma’s basement, any kind of swamp or bog and that coworker that doesn’t know about the whole deodorant thing.

#1: Cyber Immortality

The Fountain of Youth, snake oil, potions… What do they have in common? Promises of agelessness. What else? They are all phony baloney! And yet, we continue to try and find a way to make ourselves immortal. Well, perhaps the answer is focusing less on preserving our temporary meat-sack bodies, and moving towards the preservation of our true being? You know, our brain, mind, consciousness, etc. etc. The technology to replicate our brains on a computer will apparently be achievable by 2050-ish, according to the likes of Stephen Hawking and inventor and futurist Ray Kurzweil. How? Well, our brains function like a computer program, sending functions via electric signals. When we can replicate this on a powerful computer successfully, then we’ll have achieved cyber-immortality. But, as many have speculated: if we successfully upload a brain to a program, how do we know if it’s the actual person’s brain, or just a perfect copy? Yikes, we’ll have a Synth problem of our own soon!

So, would you want to be uploaded to a computer?
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